MikeLigalig.com

Ni Jojo C. Ugdol/EIM (Banat) | Updated October 27, 2014 - 12:00am


CEBU, Philippines - Patay ang usa ka 36-anyos nga lalaki nga ubos sa ilimnon nga makahubog sa dihang nanulong apan gitabangan og tigbas sa magsuon diha sa Sitio Tagaytay, Barangay Napo, dakbayan sa Carcar.

Ang biktima naila nga si Randy Reyes, duna’y ka live-in partner ug nagpuyo sa maong lugar.  Samtang ang mga suspetsado naila nga sila si Christopher, 31, ug Erwin Dayagdal, 41.

Sa imbestigasyon sa kapulisan sa Carcar nga gipangulohan ni Police Officer 3 Edmund Obiso, giingong nagkuyog ang biktima ug ang iyang kapuyo pagpauli.

Matud pa nga hubog kini niadtong tungora ug kalit nga misud sa hunahuna niini nga sulongon ang kaaway nga si Christopher.

Dihang nag-abot ang duha  gikomprontase sa biktima si Christopher  tungod sa giingong pagbahad niini nga siya patyon. Sa kalagot ni Christopher misud kini sa balay ug paggawas nagdala na kini og sundang.

Daling miibot og kalibre 38 paltik si Reyes ug gipusil si Christopher apan mikagar ang armas. Diha-diha miibot sa iyang kaugalingong sundang ang biktima ug nahitabo ang tinigbasay sa duha.

Ang igsoon ni Christopher nga si Erwin pagkakita sa hitabo daling mitabang sa iyang igsoon hinungdan nga nalupig si Reyes ug diha na kini gitabangan og tigbas.

Daling gidala sa Carcar District Hospital si Reyes apan patay na kini samtang si Christopher nalandig gihapon sa maong tambalanan tungod sa kadaghan sa samad tinigbasan sa lawas niini.

Ang iyang igsuon nga si Erwin gitanggong na karon sa Carcar Police detention cell nga gikatakdang pasakaan og kasong homicide.  (BANAT NEWS)

Hmm, unsa kahay pagtulun-an nga gitanyag niining maong dugoong balita nga madasigong ikapaambit ni Bay Bugsay nganhi kanato...

Ni Romeo T. Limpangog/EIM (Banat) | Updated October 27, 2014 - 12:00am


CEBU, Philippines - Patay ang usa ka lalaki nga miduaw sa kanhi kapuyo dihang kini gidunggab sa bag-ong kapuyo niini atubangan mismo sa ilang 5- anyos nga anak nga lalaki diha sa Sitio Milagrosa, Barangay San Vicente, Lungsod sa Liloan.

Si Senior Police Officer 1 Bryan Batiquen sa Consolacion Police Station miila sa biktima nga mao si Richard Cape, 26 , taga Barangay Lahug, Dakbayan sa Sugbo,

Ang suspetsado mao si Jovel Bolo, alyas Ovel nga bag-ong kapuyo sa kanhi kapuyo sa biktima nga maoy inahan sa 5- anyos  nga gibuhi sa biktima. Matud pa ni Batiquen nga gimingaw sa inahan ang bata hinungdan nga gidala kini sa biktima ngadto sa inahan. Sa una, walay tensyon nga nahitabo ug nag-inom pa ang duha. Apan dihang nangahubog na nagkabingkil ang duha hangtud nga nadunggaban si Cape.

Gidala sa suspek ang kapuyo lakip na ang 5-anyos nga bata.  (BANAT NEWS)

Hmm, less is more. More or less...

Gipugngan ang pangalan sa bana ug asawa samtang ang kabit nga nadunggaban gihinganlan? Giklaro pa nga minyo ug may anak, gimantala pa ang adres? Yataps...

Wa pa gani matubag sa asawa ang maong pangutana, daling gisusi niini ang ilawom sa ilang katre.

“Sakpan gyud ka, Bay!” masuk-anong sudya sa bana uban sa pagsikad sa lalaki nag-ilis pa og sinina.

Wala makapugong sa iyang gibati, ang bana nidunggab og makadaghang higayon sa lalaki.

Base sa blotter sa kapulisan, ang biktima giila nga si Salvador A. Samar, 38, minyo, dunay usa ka anak ug lumad nga taga Carreta Village, Barangay Punta Princesa, dakbayan sa Sugbo.

Ang 27-anyos nga bana nagtrabaho isip maintainance staff sa usa ka kompanya sa MEPZ II.

Si Salvador nakaangkon og duha ka samad-dinunggaban sa bukobuko ug mga garas sa nagkadaiyang parte sa lawas ginamit ang usa ka tulo ka pulgada nga kitchen knife.

Misuway pa og ikyas ang biktima pinaagi sa paglayat sa bintana sa kwarto sa magtiayon
human sa insidente.

Human sa hitabo, nitahan sa kapulisan ang bana ug padayong nagpaalim sa tambalanan si Salvador.

Samtang sulod sa ospital, si Salvador nangayo usab og pasaylo sa iyang asawa bahin sa iyang pagluib niini.

“Pasayloa gyud ko kay nakasala gyud ko nimo,” pulong ni Salvador, sumala sa kapulisan sa Sun.Star Superbalita.

SuperBalita Cebu
Ni John Paul A. Pepito
Saturday, October 25, 2014


KABIT nakaangkon og daghang samad dinunggaban human nasakpan sa bana uban sa iyang asawa sulod mismo sa lawak nga ilang giabangan sa Sitio 3H Barangay Basak, dakbayan sa Lapu-Lapu niadtong Biyernes, alas 11:00 sa gabii.

Sayo nianang gabii, ang bana giingnan sa iyang asawa nga dili una papaulion nianang gabhiona. Ang mga pangalan sa asawa nga 21-anyos ug bana nga 27-anyos gipugngan ning mantalaan.

Si PO1 Jomar Florentino sa Homicide section sa Lapu-Lapu City Police Station (LLCPO) nga ang bana niuli aron ihatod lang ang uniform ug makig-inom sa iyang mga amigo nga gikasabot.

Apan nakurat ang bana nga ngitngit ang lawak ug nag-andar ang telebisyon. Nipaspas ang pitik sa iyang dughan sanglit kini maoy naandan nila nga buhaton kon mag-sex sila sa iyang asawa.

Ug dihang giablihan ang pultahan sa iyang asawa human sa iyang pagpanuktok, nakabati siya og kisaw sa ilawom sa ilang katri.

“Love pa ko nimo!?” singgit nga pa­ngutana sa bana.

More events...

Quote from: BolBuhol on January 24, 2013, 10:59:52 PM

Calvin and Hobbes...

He he, naay buhok nga di angay ang beer shampoo, basin makapaluya lang...

7 Finished.

6 Using a funnel transfer your beer shampoo from the bowl to a plastic container with a lid to store and use it as you would any other shampoo.

5 Pour the beer into the bowl containing the shampoo and gently stir until blended.

4 Take the pan off the stove and let it cool completely. It should take about 5-10 minutes. Now may be a good time to enjoy a drink while you're waiting.

3 Measure out 1 cup of shampoo and pour it in a medium sized bowl.

2 Boil the beer for approximately 15 min. or until it reduces to about a half a cup.

1 Measure out 1 cup of beer. (Any brand can work, and can be can or bottle.) Put the beer in a medium saucepan with the lid off and turn the heat on medium high.

http://www.wikihow.com/


Making beer shampoo at home is surprisingly easy 6 step process that needs only any type of beer, a pan, stove, shampoo to use as a base. Beer can help improve the luster, help dry-scalp, and control dandruff for all hair types.

Pwede pud pulipulihon og gamit ang coffee shampoo ug beer shampoo...

Quote from: hubag bohol on October 22, 2014, 05:26:41 PM
a monkey on somebody's back
a serious problem that will not go away

Sama ani...





Oi, wa ra man maproblema si Inday, nahimuot man hinuon...

a monkey on somebody's back  (American & Australian)
a serious problem that will not go away
The divorce proceedings are a monkey on her back.

a monkey on your back
a serious problem that you cannot forget
When you know you have to do everything perfectly, it puts a giant monkey on your back.

Usage notes: also used in the form get the monkey off your back (to end a problem): By winning the championship, this team has finally got the monkey off its back.

Quote from: islander on July 13, 2014, 12:58:39 AM
definition of what rhymes with ethos:

pathos
ˈpeɪθÉ's/
noun

    a quality that evokes pity or sadness.
    "the actor injects his customary humour and pathos into the role"
    synonyms:   poignancy, tragedy, sadness, pitifulness, piteousness, pitiableness, plaintiveness, sorrowfulness
    "the pathos of Antoine's predicament"

sapathos - a type of foothwear

Quote from: hubag bohol on October 21, 2014, 06:25:58 PM

Islander's doggie


Klaro jamo nga liwat sa tag-ija, an!

Botoy's doggie


Simple lang maninina, pero kon itapad ni Islander's doggie, klarong mas kyut...

Here are the top 10 islands according to readers of CN Traveler. The full list can be found at http://cntrvlr.com/1Fx5uXO.

1. Palawan, Philippines
2. Kiawah Island, South Carolina, USA
3. Maui, Hawaii, USA
4. Kauai, Hawaii, USA
5. Bazaruto Archipelago, Mozambique
6. Great Barrier Reef & Whitsunday Islands, Australia
7. Santorini & Cyclades, Greece
8. St. John, U.S. Virgin Islands
9. Kangaroo Island, Australia
10. Big Island, Hawaii, USA

Along with its lagoons, beaches, and dramatic limestone cliffs, one of its most astounding natural features can also be found in the capital city of Puerto Princesa, an 8 km (5 miles) subterranean river that snakes through an underground cave system.

Not surprisingly, dominating the list of top islands in the world is Hawaii, which landed three spots in the top 10 ranking for Maui, Kauai and Big Island.

Interestingly, the second highest-ranked island doesn’t hail from French Polynesia or the Caribbean, but...South Carolina.

A short drive away from Charleston, Kiawah Island is described as a small barrier island on the Atlantic coast that can feel like it’s “a world away.”

The destination is particularly popular for golf enthusiasts, as it’s home to a sprawling 90-hole golf resort.

Palawan in the Philippines named world's top island: CN Traveler
14 hours ago Relaxnews


Tourists explore a cave at the Puerto Princesa Subterranean River National Park in Palawan, Philippines


If you’ve been to Thailand, done Bali and bought the T-shirt in Vietnam, consider Palawan, one of 7,107 islands belonging to the Philippines that’s just been named the world’s top island by readers of CN Traveler magazine.

About an hour’s flight from Manila, Palawan’s virtue lies in the fact that it remains largely uncolonized by international hotel chains and developments -- and consequently heaving throngs of fellow tourists.

Coffee May Protect the Liver
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/
By Nicholas Bakalar   
October 20, 2014 8:17 pm


Drinking coffee â€" even decaffeinated coffee â€" may protect your liver, a large new study has found.

Researchers examined the coffee-drinking habits of 27,793 people who filled out diet questionnaires in a large national health study from 1999 to 2010. The scientists also tracked blood levels of four enzymes that indicate liver function. The study is online in Hepatology.

More than 14,000 of the subjects drank coffee. After controlling for age, sex, race, education, smoking, alcohol consumption and other factors, the researchers found that compared with people who drank no coffee, those who drank three cups a day were about 25 percent less likely to have abnormal liver enzyme levels. Among the more than 2,000 who drank only decaffeinated coffee, the results were similar.

The reason for the effect is unclear. “There are more than a thousand compounds in coffee,” said the lead author, Qian Xiao, a cancer prevention fellow at the National Cancer Institute. “There are a few candidates, but I don’t know which is responsible.”

Should those who do not drink coffee start doing so? “This is an observational study and not designed to determine cause and effect,” Dr. Xiao said. “So based on this study, I wouldn’t make any recommendations. But it is reassurance that coffee and decaf are not harmful to liver function.”

My favorite...

Ingon ani ang hitsura sa gihiloasn nga iro...

Ni Khacel Anne Diel Sanchez (Banat) | Updated October 22, 2014 - 12:00am


CEBU, Philippines â€" Gireklamo sa usa ka babaye ang iyang silingang Belgian human ang iyang iro balor og P70,000 ang giingong gihiloan sa barangay Maghaway, Talisay City. Ang tag-iya sa English sheep dog mao si Jaclyn Precious Vivar, 35-anyos, dalaga ug maestra kauban ang caretaker sa iyang balay ang ni-report sa kapolisan human ilang nakit-an ang maong iro nga wala na’y kinabuhi.

Sa inisyal nga imbestigasyon sa kapolisan nasayran nga nilakaw si Vivar padulong sa trabaho ug gibilin niya ang iyang iro kang Mario Sabal kinsa usa ka tanod sa barangay.

Matud ni Sabal nga human niya pakan-a ang iro, nibalik siya sa kusina apan iyang nakit-an si Jan Julius Verkoulen nga may gilabay ngadto sa iro.

Dali niyang gidagan ang iro ug gisuwayan pagkuha gikan sa baba ang ground beef nga gilabay ni Verkoulen.

Gipahibawo ni Sabal si Vivar sa panghitabo ug pag-abot niini sa balay, iyang nakit-an si Gom nga wala na’y kinabuhi.

Sa CCTV footage ilang nakompirmar nga si Verkoulen gyud ang nilabay og ground beef nga nakaon ni Gom. Daling gipahibawo ni Sabal ug Vivar ang kapolisan aron madakop ang langyaw apan wala nila nakit-i sa iyang gipuy-an.

Gipadayag ni Vivar nga iyang pasakaan og kasong kriminal si Verkuolen sa paglapas niini sa Republic Act 8485 kon ang Animal Welfare Act of 1998. â€" /GMR) (BANAT NEWS)

He he, B as in Banat?

Dos mil? Mahal pa man ang usa ka litson baboy...

P2 mil ray suhol sa mga gun-for-hire: Gillamac
Ni Guam P. Logroño
Tuesday, October 21, 2014


BARATO ra diay ang kinabuhi.

Sa P2,000 nga suhol, mahimo ka na diay nga patyon.

Mao kini ang gibutyag ni Sr. Supt. Noel Gillamac, direktor sa Cebu Police Provincial Office (CPPO), dihang nahinabi sa Sun.Star Superbalita nunot sa kamatayon sa lider sa grupo sa mga gun-for-hire ug giingong tulisan nga si Jojo Gañolon ug Arnel Coronel ug laing tulo ka mga kauban.

Ang 10 ka mga sakop sa grupo, usa kanila gii­ngong pinanser, nadakpan sa dungan nga mga operasyon niadtong Sabado sa mga bukirang dapit sa habagatang Sugbo.

Matod ni Gillamac nga mao kini ang rason kon nganong gikahadlukan ang mao nga grupo sa mga lumolupyo sa kabukiran.

Si Gillamac nibutyag nga gilangkuban sa 20 kapin ang grupo ug naglihok kini sa tibuok lalawigan sa Sugbo.

“Kini maoy rason nga kurog gyud kaayo ang mga residente sa bukid nila kay bisan P2 mil ra ilang dawaton aron makasapi, manulis pa sa mga mobisita sa bukid panahon sa fiesta, ang mga babaye harason” dugang ni Gillamac.

Quote from: hubag bohol on October 21, 2014, 07:18:14 PM
George Bernard Shaw

After the opening performance of Arms and the Man in London in 1894, playwright George Bernard Shaw joined the actors on stage to acknowledge a rousing, appreciative ovation. Amidst the sustained applause, a solitary voice cried out: "Boo! Boo!" Shaw looked in the direction of the voice and said:

“I quite agree with you my friend, but what can we two do against a whole houseful of the opposite opinion?”

This one is a favorite of mine:

G. K. Chesterton: To look at you, Shaw, anyone would think a famine had struck England.
George Bernard Shaw: To look at you, Chesterton, anyone would think you have caused it.



George Bernard Shaw



G. K. Chesterton

Hmm, I was thinking more of the facial expression...

John Wilkes

Perhaps the most celebrated retort in the history of wit occurred in a famous exchange between two 18th century political rivals, John Montagu, also known as the Earl of Sandwich, and the reformist politician, John Wilkes. During a heated argument, Montagu scowled at Wilkes and said derisively, "Upon my soul, Wilkes, I don't know whether you'll die upon the gallows, or of syphilis" (some versions of the story say "a vile disease" and others "the pox"). Unfazed, Wilkes came back with what many people regard as the greatest retort of all time:

“That will depend, my Lord, on whether I embrace your principles, or your mistress.”

Oscar Wilde

In 1882, the 28-year-old Oscar Wilde embarked on a year-long lecture tour of America. During that much-heralded trip, he traveled to more than seventy cities and towns across the U. S. and Canada, lecturing on art and the aesthetic movement to intellectuals in Boston, farmers in Nebraska, and miners in Colorado. With his velvet coat, frilly silk shirts, and patent leather shoes, Wilde looked every inch the English dandy. He also shocked people with his open displays of sensuality (when he met Walt Whitman in New Jersey, the two men greeted each other with a kiss on the lips). Wilde's tour started with a bang on January 2, 1882, when he arrived at New York Harbor. Asked by a U. S. Customs official if he had anything to declare, he famously replied:

“I have nothing to declare but my genius.”

James McNeill Whistler

Primarily remembered today for his paintings, James McNeill Whistler also became a successful author with the publication of his 1890 book "The Gentle Art of Making Enemies." An exceedingly witty man, he was one of the few people who could hold his own with the incomparable Oscar Wilde. In one legendary exchange, after Whistler had offered a particularly clever observation, Wilde said admiringly, "I wish I had said that." Whistler seized the moment, replying:

“You will, Oscar, you will.”

Mae West

In 1926, after spending a few decades paying her dues and developing her provocative stage persona, Mae West began writing, producing, and starring in her own Broadway shows. In her first play, titled Sex, she challenged social convention by playing a prostitute. The show was an immediate success, and West achieved national fame when she was jailed for eight days for "corrupting the morals of youth." In 1928, she followed up with her next hit play, Diamond Lil, in which she more fully displayed the sultry, wisecracking style that would become her trademark. In one scene, a woman gazes at West's jewelry and says with admiration, "Goodness! What beautiful diamonds." West replied:

“Goodness had nothing to do with it, dearie.”

Voltaire

In the mid-1700s, the great French man of letters known as Voltaire was invited by friends to attend an orgy in Paris. Having never participated in such an event, but always open to new experiences, he eagerly accepted the invitation. The next day, as the group rehashed the previous night's activities, the intellectually-curious philosopher reported that he had learned many new things and had greatly enjoyed the experience. Happy to learn that they might have converted the great philosopher to their hedonistic ways, the group invited him to join them again later that evening. Voltaire graciously declined by offering a bon mot that only served to enhance his reputation as a great wit and wordsmith:

“Ah no, my good friends, once a philosopher, twice a pervert.”

Mark Twain

Olivia Clemens, the wife of Mark Twain, often struggled with her husband's salty language. After years of unsuccessful nagging, she decided one day to try a different tack. Having heard Twain cuss a blue streak after he cut himself while shaving, Mrs. Clemens spent the rest of the day repeating those very same profanities, hoping the endless repetition would get her husband to see what he sounded like and, hopefully, motivate him to clean up his act. Twain patiently let her have her fun throughout the day, but when she did it once again before bedtime, he calmly observed:

“You have heard the words, my dear, but you will never master the tune.”

George Bernard Shaw

After the opening performance of Arms and the Man in London in 1894, playwright George Bernard Shaw joined the actors on stage to acknowledge a rousing, appreciative ovation. Amidst the sustained applause, a solitary voice cried out: "Boo! Boo!" Shaw looked in the direction of the voice and said:

“I quite agree with you my friend, but what can we two do against a whole houseful of the opposite opinion?”

Babe Ruth

In the 1920s, George Herman "Babe" Ruth was not only the greatest home run hitter the game had ever seen, he was alsoâ€"by a large marginâ€"the highest paid. In 1927, he made a staggering $70,000 (teammate Lou Gehrig made $8,000 that year). Ruth's highest annual salary was $80,000, which he made in 1930 and 1931, at a time when the country was slipping deeper and deeper into The Great Depression. Despite a monster year in 1931 (.373 batting average, 46 home runs, 163 RBIs), Yankee officials cited economic hard times when they asked Ruth to reduce his salary to $75,000 for the 1932 season. Ruth made headlines when he held out. At a press conference, a reporter pointed out that $80,000 was $5,000 more than President Hoover's salary. Ruth considered the question and said:

“Maybe so, but I had a better year than he did.”

Dorothy Parker

In the 1920s, Dorothy Parker was establishing a reputation as a witty woman with a sharp tongue (the actress Mrs. Patrick Campbell called her, "My pretty, pretty cobra"). At the same time, Clare Booth Luce was becoming a respected journalist and well-known playwright. While both women were highly talented, their numerous political, philosophical, and personal differences resulted in a strained relationship. One day, Parker was about to step through a doorway when she came face-to-face with Luce. As the story goes, Mrs. Luce stepped aside, extended the palm of her hand, and said coyly, "Age before beauty." Parker glided through the door, saying ever-so-sweetly:

“Pearls before swine.”

Groucho Marx

From 1950 to 1961, Groucho Marx's "You Bet Your Life" was one of the most popular shows on television. In addition to being a perfect vehicle for Groucho's quick wit, the show featured several gimmicks that became part of television history (a little bird that appeared whenever a contestant uttered "the magic word" and the question, "Who is buried in Grant's tomb?"). Shot before a live audience, Groucho would typically interview contestants for a short while before moving onto the quiz portion of the show. However, so many of Groucho's quips were off-color or risqué that it generally took to up to two hours to produce enough suitable material for a half-hour show. One night, a contestant revealed that he was the father of ten children. When Groucho asked "Why so many children?" the man answered, "Well, Groucho, I love my wife." Marx hesitated for a moment, panned to the audience in his inimitable manner, and then delivered one of the most famous lines never to be actually broadcast on the show:

“I love my cigar, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.”

Chico Marx

Chico (correctly pronounced "chick-oh") Marx, the oldest of the brothers, got his famous nickname from his penchant for chasing young women (i.e., chicks) early in his life. Although the Marx Brothers made millions over the years, Chico was often in financial straits because of a lifelong gambling problem (his wife Betty insisted that they rent rather than own a home for fear of Chico's losing their house in a card game). Over the years, his interest in the ladies also created a few marital problems. At a club one night, Betty angrily accused Chico of kissing another woman on the dance floor. His defense may not have convinced his wife, but it has pleased language lovers ever since:

“I wasn't kissing her, I was whispering in her mouth.”

Quote from: islander on October 21, 2014, 06:16:18 PM
whew!  if this were true as in true, true, regardless of under whose name this is, arang gajod, where goest the former human rights lawyer who now wants to be president?

Ah, what one formerly was doesn't count, I guess. As in this one:

John F. Kennedy

President John F. Kennedy and his father Joseph were once proudly watching JFK's daughter Caroline at play. As they sat side-by-side on comfortable lawn chairs, no words passed between the two men for quite some time. Finally, the elder Kennedy said, "Caroline's very bright, Jack." Then, after a pause, he added, "Smarter than you were at that age." The president adopted a similar thoughtful demeanor and, without looking over at his dad, said, "Yes, she is." Then, after a pause of his own, he added:

“But look who she has for a father.”

Pope John XXIII

One of the few pontiffs in history with a rich sense of humor, Pope John XXIII once reported to an interviewer that important problems would frequently come to mind in the middle of the night, disturbing his sleep. Half awake, he'd make a mental note: "I must speak to the pope about that." "Then," he confessed, "I would be wide awake and rememberâ€"I am the pope!" Once asked by a journalist, "How many people work in the Vatican?" the pontiff pondered the question, giving the impression that he was trying to come up with an accurate estimate. Then, with a straight face, he answered:

“About half.”

Alfred Hitchcock

Alfred Hitchcock's 1944 film "Lifeboat," a drama about eight survivors of a freighter sunk by a German U-Boat, was one of the most popular films of the year (it was also nominated for three Academy Awards). While posing for publicity photographs for the film, actress Mary Anderson approached the director and asked, "What is my best side, Mr. Hitchcock?" His reply was soon being circulated all around Hollywood:

“My dear, you're sitting on it.”

W. C. Fields

W. C. Fields died at age sixty-seven on December 25, 1946, his life cut short by his notorious alcohol consumption (by some accounts, he drank as much as two quarts of gin a day). Some wags thought it was a fitting irony that Fields died on Christmas, the one holiday he despised the most. As he lay in his hospital bed shortly before his death, Fields was visited by the actor Thomas Mitchell, a good friend. When Mitchell entered Fields' room, he was shocked to find the irreligious Fields paging through a Bible. Fields was a lifelong agnostic, and fervently anti-religious (he once said that he had skimmed the Bible while looking for movie plots, but found only "a pack of wild lies"). "What are you doing reading a Bible?" asked the astonished Mitchell. A wiseacre to the end, Fields replied:

“I'm looking for loopholes.”

Edna Ferber

Edna Ferber worked for a number of years as a news reporter in the Midwest before moving to New York City in 1912. After her novel "So Big" won the Pulitzer Prize in 1926, she quickly followed up with the hit play "Show Boat" (so successful and financially remunerative, she called it her "oil well"). Ferber was fond of wearing tailored suits well before they became fashionable. One day, she arrived at the Algonquin Hotel wearing a suit that was very similar to one that the English actor Noël Coward was wearing. Ferber and Coward were friends (she once described him as her favorite theater companion) and Coward saw an opportunity to engage in a bit of playful badinage with one of his favorite people. Carefully looking her over, he observed, "Edna, you look almost like a man." Ferber looked Coward over in a similar manner and came back with a classic riposte:

“So do you.”

Calvin Coolidge

In a profession noted for windbags, the 30th U. S. President Calvin Coolidge was a politician of very few words, well deserving the nickname, "Silent Cal" (he once said, "I've never been hurt by something I didn't say"). Coolidge's taciturn style frustrated the many people around him who felt a man of his stature should be more talkative. At a White House dinner one evening, a female guest sidled up to the President and whispered in his ear, "You must talk to me, Mr. President. I made a bet today that I could get more than two words out of you." Coolidge whispered back:

“You lose.”

Marc Connelly

When it comes to repartee, nobody did it better than the members of that legendary collection of wits known as The Algonquin Round Table. For many decades, a delightful story has been told about one member of the group, playwright Marc Connelly. One evening, Connelly was dining with friends when another member of the group snuck up from behind, placed his hands on top of Connelly's bald head, and said to the amusement of the other guests, "Marc, your head feels as smooth as my wife's ass." Without missing a beat, Connelly raised his hands to his head, began rubbing his own scalp, and with a wry smile, said:

“So it does, so it does.”

Winston Churchill

Nancy Astor was an American socialite who married into an English branch of the wealthy Astor family (she holds the distinction of being the first woman to be seated in Parliament). At a 1912 dinner party in Blenheim Palaceâ€"the Churchill family estateâ€"Lady Astor became annoyed at an inebriated Winston Churchill, who was pontificating on some topic. Unable to take any more, she finally blurted out, "Winston, if you were my husband, I'd put poison in your coffee." Without missing a beat, Churchill replied:

“Nancy, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.”

Another famous Churchill reply also involves a London party and a female Member of Parliament, and once again a slightly inebriated Churchill. This time, it was Bessie Braddock, a socialist Member of Parliament from Liverpool, who finally had enough. She reproached Churchill by charging, "Winston, you're drunk!" The Grand Old Man may have had one too many drinks, but he still had his wits about him, replying:

“You're right, Bessie. And you're ugly. But tomorrow morning, I'll be sober. And you'll still be ugly.”

Johnny Carson

During his three-decades as host of The Tonight Show, Johnny Carson delivered some of the funniest lines in the history of show business. While many of his best lines were undoubtedly written by his stable of talented comedy writers, one of Carson's funniestâ€"and most famousâ€"remarks was a spontaneous quip he made on a 1965 show. The guest that night was Ed Ames, formerly of the popular singing group "The Ames Brothers" and at the time appearing on the Daniel Boone television series in the role of Mingo, a Harvard-educated, tomahawk-throwing Indian. When Ames said he had taken tomahawk throwing lessons, Carson asked for a demonstration. Within seconds, a curtain opened, revealing the chalked outline of a standing human figure on a huge wooden log. As Ames hurled the tomahawk at the target, he said, "This is how you take care of an enemy." To everyone's shock, the blade of the tomahawk landed squarely in the crotch of the human figure, with the handle pointing up and out, looking almost like an erect penis. There was a moment of stunned silence, which was immediately followed by Carson's quip:

“Gee, Ed, I didn't even know you were Jewish. A frontier bris!”

A bris, of course, is the term for the Jewish circumcision ritual. After Carson's remark, the audience erupted into one of the longest laughs in television history. As the laughter died down, Ames said to Carson, "Would you like to give it a try?" Carson declined, and got one last laugh as he said, "I can't hurt him any more than you did."

Truman Capote

Truman Capote was fond of regaling people with an anecdote about one of his finer moments. At the height of his popularity, he was drinking one evening with friends in a crowded Key West bar. Nearby sat a couple, both inebriated. The woman recognized Capote, walked over to his table, and gushingly asked him to autograph a paper napkin. The woman's husband, angry at his wife's display of interest in another man, staggered over to Capote's table and assumed an intimidating position directly in front of the diminutive writer. He then proceeded to unzip his trousers and, in Capote's own words, "hauled out his equipment." As he did this, he bellowed in a drunken slur, "Since you're autographing things, why don't you autograph this?" It was a tense moment, and a hush fell over the room. The silence was a blessing, for it allowed all those within earshot to hear Capote's soft, high-pitched voice deliver the perfect emasculating reply:

“I don't know if I can autograph it, but perhaps I can initial it.”

Niels Bohr

After receiving the Nobel Prize in 1922, the Danish physicist Niels Bohr invited friends and associates to a celebration party at his country cottage North of Copenhagen. The event was also well-attended by members of the press. One reporter, noticing a horseshoe hanging on a wall, teasingly asked the famous physicist, "Can it be that you, of all people, believe a horseshoe will bring you good luck?" Bohr replied:

“Of course not, but I understand it brings you luck whether you believe it or not.”

Robert Benchley

After lunching at the Algonquin Hotel one day, the American humorist Robert Benchley and his companions walked through the lobby and out the front door. Still engaged in conversation with his friends, Benchley offhandedly said to the uniformed man standing by the front door, "My good man, would you please get me a taxi?" The man immediately took offense and replied indignantly, "I'm not a doorman. I happen to be a rear admiral in the United States Navy." Benchley instantly quipped:

  “All right then, get me a battleship.”

John Barrymore

After a long day of shooting a film in Hollywood, John Barrymore and some fellow actors stopped in at Lucey's, a popular watering hole near Paramount Studios. After one-too-many drinks, Barrymore excused himself to go to the bathroom. In his slightly inebriated condition, however, he inadvertently chose the ladies' room. As he was relieving himself, a woman entered and was shocked to see a man urinating into one of the toilets. "How dare you!" she exclaimed, "This is for ladies!" The actor turned toward the woman, organ in hand, and resonantly said in full actor's voice:

  “And so, madam, is this.”

http://www.drmardy.com/repartee/historygreatreplies.shtml

Islander's doggie


Klaro jamo nga liwat sa tag-ija, an!

http://bisayanews.com/cebuano-news/naligsan-og-porlon-patay/


KIDAPAWAN CITY â€" Patay ang usa ka mag-uuma human siya gibanggaan sa porlon nga dunay kargang patay alas 9:30 sa gabii niadtong Lunes didto sa probinsiya sa Cotabato.

Giila ang biktima nga mao si Regan Pangundas Saliling, 37, minyo ug molupyo sa Sitio Gawasan, Barangay Bintagan, Carmen.

Nasayran gikan sa spot report gikan sa North Cotabato Provincial Police Office nga sakay ang biktima sa iyang bisikleta ug patabok sa National Highway sa Barangay Balogo, Pigcawayan niadtong tungura.

Apan kalit siyang gibanggaan sa naghaguros nga porlon sa Saint Peter Funeral Homes.

Dead on the spot si Saliling dihang sentro siyang nabanggaan sa porlon ug nalagpot.

Ang porlon sa Saint Peter dunay kargang patay gikan sa Cotabato Regional and Medical Center (CRMC) sa Cotabato City.

Gikanayon sa mga sibilyan nga nakakita sa hitabo nga nakainom ang biktima nga sakay sa iyang bisikleta dihang mitabok sa kalsada ug nabanggaan sa porlon.

Boluntaryo sab nga mi-surrender ang drayber sa porlon ngadto sa kapulisan nga wala gibutyag ang pangalan gumikan sa seguridad nga padayon nga gi-imbestigahan sa traffic unit sa Pagcawayan Police Station.

Laude’s boyfriend arrives



Marc Suselbeck, the German fiancé of Jeffrey ‘Jennifer’ Laude, weeps at the wake for the slain transgender in Olongapo City yesterday.


Meanwhile, Marc Sueselbeck, the German boyfriend of Laude, arrived yesterday at the Ninoy Aquino International Airport (NAIA) Terminal 1 to pay his respects to his lover.

“I cannot say much. Jennifer usually picked me up at the airport every time I arrived and now she is not here, so sad,” said Sueselbeck, a financial accountant.

Sueselback said he had been in Manila at least five to six times and “I had good times with Jennifer.”

“We met online and were in a relationship for more than two years.”

He had plans of marrying Jennifer in Thailand next year, “to start life over together.”

They communicated through social media, Sueselbeck said.

Sueselbeck condemned the brutality of Laude’s death, describing the suspect as “sick” and “bloodthirsty.”

Laude’s burial was moved from Oct. 21 to 24 to give more time for friends and relatives to attend the wake.

http://www.philstar.com/headlines/2014/10/21/1382610/noy-hit-silence-jennifer-case

Ni Jojo C. Ugdol (Banat) | Updated October 21, 2014 - 12:00am


CEBU, Philippines â€" Usa ka negosyante nga florist ang nakit-an nga wala nay kinabuhi nga nakaangkon og mga samad dinunggaban sa lawas niini diha sa Barangay Day-as ning dakbayan sa Sugbo, kagahapon sa buntag.

Pagpanulis ang usa sa gidudahang motibo sa kapulisan sa nahitabong pagpatay ni Daniel “Jun” Cañete, 44, nga nagpuyo ug nag-abang sa ground floor sa VR Apartment nga nahimutang sa Sikatuna Street, Day-as. Ang hepe sa kapulisan sa dakbayan nga si Senior Superintendent Noli Romana mimando sa Homicide ug Theft and Robbery Section nga mohimo og hiniusang imbestigasyon sa mao’ng krimen.

Si Cañete nga lumad nga taga Pagadian City, duna kini duha ka mga anak lalaki ug buwag na sa asawa. Kini nakaangkon og daghang samad sa kalawasan partikular sa iyang tiyan, hinungdan nga nakabsan sa iyang kinabuhi.

Sa gihimo nga ocular inspection sa Homicide Section sa crime scene dunay gibanabana nga P250,000 nga salapi nga nawala sa drawer sa biktima, apil  sa nahanaw ang laptop, iphone ug lain pa nga mga cellphones niini. Si Cañete maoy tag -iya sa JMC Wedding Creation. Ang iyang patay nga lawas nadiskobrehan sa iyang empleyado nga si Ivy Medalle pasado alas -7 sa buntag.

Gidugang pa ni Medalle nga kasagaran duna’y mga bisita nga mga lalaki si Cañete panahon sa gabii. Niadtong Domingo sa gabii, nabantayan sa usa sa mga residente sa mao’ng lugar nga dunay usa ka lalaking mibisita ug misulod sa shop sa biktima.

Laing trabahante nga si Hernani Timtim mitug-an nga gibanabanang dunay P250,000 ang cash sa drawer ni Cañete nga ilang kinitaan  sukad pa niadtong Biyernes nga unta ilang ideposito sa bangko kagahapong adlawa. Si SPO4 Alex Dacua imbestigador sa Homicide Section mitug-an tulo ka oras nang patay sa dihang nadiskobrehan si Cañete. â€" /EIM) (BANAT NEWS)

Ni Jojo C. Ugdol (Banat) | Updated October 21, 2014 - 12:00am


CEBU, Philippines â€" Patay diha-diha ang usa ka 65-anyos nga lola human kini gitigbas sa iyang umagad gamit ang sanggot sa sitio Kamagayan, Borbon niadtong nakalabay nga gabii.

Ang biktima naila nga si Rufina Pilit, mag-uuma sa maong lugar samtang ang suspek naila nga si Gloria Pilit, 45, minyo ug silingan ra sa biktima. Matud ni SPO3 Robin Baticuang, imbestigador sa Borbon Police, nga gikan nangompra ang biktima sa usa ka tabo ug pag-uli niini sa ilang balay iyang gipangita ang iyang bana.

Naabot sa balay sa suspek sa pagpangita ang biktima ug sumala pa nahitabo ang init nga lalis tali sa duha.

Human sa lalis nakahukom ang biktima nga mouli na sa iyang balay apan gisundan sa suspek ug pag-abot sa kamaisan, gitigbas sa umagad igo sa ulo nga bahin ang biktima.

Ang kapitan sa maong barangay nga dali sab nga gipahibawo sa maong insidente ang dali sab mihimo og blockade sa ilang barangay aron dili makaikyas ang suspek ug mitawag og tabang sa kapolisan.

Sa pagpangita sa kapolisan ug mga barangay opisyal, ilang nasikop ang suspek nga paingon na unta mosibat.

Narekober sa kapolisan ang sanggot nga gituohang gigamit sa suspek sa pagpatay ni Pilit. â€"/GMR) (BANAT NEWS)

DAVAO. The booth of Purok 11 of Barangay Los Amigos in Tugbok District, Davao City, is decorated with all kinds of fruits and vegetables in the farmer’s fair in celebration of the 47th Araw ng Barangay. (Seth Delos Reyes)

There are thousands of websites and blogs written about the corruption in the Philippines Immigration, just Google Philippines Immigration Corruption, it will give you years of reading.

How can such a "criminal syndicate" operate for such a long period of time? They lock up and detain pregnant women, children, handicapped, elderly, foreigners and extort them in order for a release.

Remember Bicutan Immigration Detention center is supposed to be a temporary administrative holding facility, why are foreigners being held on an average of 6 years? There are foreigners that are being held for 7, 9, 11, 14 years in Bicutan.

Despite criminal complaints filed with Commission of Human Rights, Philippines Ombudsman, DOJ, Senators, Office of President, Manila Prosecutors office and many other agencies, nothing is being done.

The only way to clean up this "cancer of corruption" is mandatory early retirement for the entire legal staff including the Board of Commissioners. Replace with younger, in-corrupt staff that will look for a better Philippines, one that looks for the future not for their pockets, looks for humanity and legal due process, not their pockets.

The Department of Justice which is headed by Leila De Lima is the agency that oversees the Philippines Bureau of Immigration. So why does the DOJ not take action? Simple answer, Leila De Lima and Siegfried Mison go back a long way to law school, they are close friends. How can 1 friend discipline another? This is a criminal syndicate, if one goes down, so does the other.

Leila De Lima knew what Siegfried Mison was doing, all his dirty deals, but she turned a blind eye and deaf ears in order to recommend him as Chief Commissioner. How can she oversee the Bureau of Immigration when her own agency is over ridden with corruption and deal making prosecutors?

The Foreigners for Justice group has uncovered and provided evidence of extortion, payoffs, bribery, violence, drug dealing, human rights and legal due process violations by the Philippines Immigration headed by Siegfried Mison, yet only 1 person has been arrested and charged, Arvin Cesar Santos, and his punishment is to be promoted?

Webpages, blogs, media have all exposed corruption in the DOJ and Immigration, even the President calls them a "criminal syndicate" but not 1 official has been convicted and the same criminals are in the same positions or get promoted.

http://www.philippinesimmigration.info/
http://www.foreign-assistance-center.com

Why? 2 main reasons.

1) Money - If Arvin Cesar Santos was suspended or transferred out of the legal department, then Siegfried Mison had no one he could trust to make his deals. Who would be the buffer? His dirty money would finish!

2) Blackmail- If Arvin Cesar Santos is to take all the blame, then he will take down Siegfed Mison with him. Partners in crime! See articles posted:

"BI Ex-chief of legal, Arvin Cesar Santos in fear of his life, tells all about corrupt DOJ prosecutors and immigration legal department"

http://shamelessimmigration.blogspot.com/2014/02/bi-ex-chief-of-legal-arvin-cesar-santos.html

"Immigration ex-chief of legal Arvin Santos tells all, Siegfred Mison knew everything that was going on, he was neck deep”

http://shamelessimmigration.blogspot.com/2014/02/immigration-ex-chief-of-legal-arvin.html

"Philippines Immigration Chief Siegfred Mison is neck deep in illegal activity within Bureau of Immigration"

http://shamelessimmigration.blogspot.com/2014/02/philippines-immigration-chief-siegfred.html

This whole process could take 24-36 months, while the foreigner is kept locked up. No bail is given, the reason is to pressure the foreigner into paying the extortion money.

Bicutan immigration detention center is a holding facility for victims of extortion. Most victims are Chinese, Koreans, Indians and Europeans. The foreigners with money.

Philippines Immigration Commissioner Siegfried Mison and now promoted OIC Arvin Cesar Santos have a long history. Hundreds of dirty deals have been made and millions of pesos has changed hands, extorting foreigners, approving visas, releasing child rapists and anything that needed fixing.

http://shamelessimmigration.blogspot.gr/2014/02/immigration-commissioner-chief-siegfred.html?m=1

When Arvin Cesar Santos was arrested and charged with Graft and Corruption just 9 months ago, he was not suspended for helping a Korean fugitive escape and also issued him an employment visa, he was promoted by BI Chief Siegfried Mison.

6.If the foreigner goes before the Philippines DOJ, he will then face the corrupt Chief Counsels and prosecutors who handle Immigration cases and is coordinating with the corrupt immigration legal staff.

7. Again the foreigner will face extortion by the DOJ prosecutors to quickly resolve the appeals in a short period of time or it will be rejected.

8. If the foreigner does not pay, the appeal process will face delays negligently beyond the 3 month time period to resolve, it could be delayed for 12-15 months.

9. Once a rejection of the appeal has been decided, the foreigner must file a "Motion for Reconsideration" , which will take 6-10 months to decide, obviously negative. The DOJ will then send back to the Immigration commissioner Siegfried Mison "for comments", once again you will be approached to pay extortion money in order to get a positive comment.

10. Once the MTR is decided, then the foreigner can file an appeal with the Court of Appeals, which will take 6-12 months.

The process is as follows:

1. Throw away the first filings by the foreigner, thus have him wait 2-3 months until his lawyer makes inquiries, only to find out that it has gone "missing" despite being stamped and mark received.

2. Refile the same filing and have to wait another 2 months for a reply, which is a definite rejection.

3. Then file a "Motion for Reconsideration", which will be rejected. After another 2-6 months a summary deportation order is issued.

4. Then a "Motion for Reconsideration" must be filed, which could take another 2-6 months to get an answer, if at this point the foreigner does not pay the extortion money, it will be rejected.

5. The foreigner has the option to file an Appeal Memorandum before the Department of Justice or the Office of the President.

How can ex-chief of legal Arvin Cesar Santos was arrested not less than 9 months ago and charged with Graft and Corruption practices by the Manila prosecutors office on December 19, 2013 for helping a Korean fugitive released from Bicutan, [See article http://www.rappler.com/nation/46260-charges-immigration-officials-escape-korean-park] keep a position and get promoted under the most important man in the Philippines Immigration?

There are logically 2 ways, either money or blackmail, lets look at the possible scenarios.

First at money payoffs, it is a well known fact that millions of pesos were passing through the hands of "fixers" to the legal department prosecutors who in turn paid off the chief of legal, Arvin Cesar Santos, who was the buffer for the corrupt commissioners. All these payoffs were for either fixing visa violations or obtaining visas for foreigners.

Bicutan Immigration detention center became a processing factory for foreigners, if the foreigner did not pay the exorbitant amount of extortion money, which ranged from 200,000 php to 10 million php ($5000-$175,000), depending if the foreigner had administrative violation or if they were fugitives from their country. The foreigners could be held for days or up to years, they became commodities,  illegally detained until their will was broken and they paid the extortion amount demanded.

If the foreigner did not pay and decided to take the legal recourse, it became a long a grueling process. The legal department first action is to file a charge sheet and detain the foreigner, thus he is caged like a trapped animal. The foreigner will file a "Motion to dismiss charge sheet and Motion for bail". Bail is never given, how can you extort them for large payments if they are free?

Philippines Immigration: "cancer of corruption" under protection of DOJ. Despite changes, it remains the biggest "criminal syndicate"
http://ireport.cnn.com/docs/DOC-1180207
By PetAnderson  |  Posted October 16, 2014  |  Manila, Philippines





In the ongoing fight against corruption in the Philippines government agencies, there has been dramatic exposure by net citizens or "whistleblowers", enough to have 3 famous senators charged, arrested and detained without bail. The 3 senators were suspended from their duties.

In the Philippines Immigration, the most famous "deal maker" Arvin Cesar Santos, ex-chief of legal, was arrested and charged on December 19, 2013 for Graft and Corruption practices, not only got to keep a position in the legal department but also received a promotion to serve directly under the Chief Commissioner Siegfried Mison.

Quote from: bugsay on October 20, 2014, 05:46:30 PM
wa'y blema ka membro na man ta's hukbalahap...

...nga sa tanto-tanto, sa pagpunayng sil-ing-sil-ing, mahimong Huk nga nahalap...

Hanep...