A man was brought before the judge and charged with Necrophilia (having sex with a dead woman).
The judge told him, 'In 20 years on the bench, I've never heard such a disgusting, immoral thing. Just give me one good reason why I shouldn't lock you up and throw away the key!'
The man replied, 'I'll give you THREE good reasons:
1. It's none of your damn business.
2. She was my wife; and.... .
3. I didn't KNOW she was dead, she ALWAYS acted that way!'