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jorgeanna

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Is there somthing wrong with me?
« on: March 14, 2010, 04:16:56 PM »
My grandfather died four years ago. He was the best grandfather ever. I was really close to him even if he stayed in Jolo and I live in Bohol. I was already here in China when we got the news that he passed away. It was quite a shock to us because he just recovered and was very healthy that time. When i heard about his death, no tear ever came out .... and until now, i cannot shed a tear for him. I have not even mourned for his death... Is there something wrong with me?

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Ching

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #1 on: March 14, 2010, 06:34:11 PM »
my own opinion, there's nothing wrong with you. not all people acts & reacts the same. in your situation, you're just suppressing your feeling, still in denial phase. i am sometimes like that,coz i don't like to cry coz to me it is a sign of weakness but it is not true. it is also one way of releasing, learn that through the yrs. one day you will be able to accept it...

jorgeanna

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #2 on: March 14, 2010, 07:21:01 PM »

maybe ur ryt.. the sad part is that i haven't seen his grave... a lot of my cousins are telling me to visit Jolo and visit my grandpa but as always, i have a reason not to go back to Jolo...

hubag bohol

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #3 on: March 14, 2010, 07:22:43 PM »
I agree with Ms. Ching. The heart is a mysterious thing. One day, Ann, as you go about your daily chores, something you do will likely trigger a flood of remembrance of your grandfather, and your tears will fall without letup.
...than to speak out and remove all doubt." - Abraham Lincoln

jorgeanna

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #4 on: March 14, 2010, 07:25:34 PM »
i hope that "someday" will come soon.

ms da binsi

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #5 on: March 14, 2010, 10:39:31 PM »


you dont have to cry for deaths Anne. your brain wants to cry but your heart knows how he is now. Do dont cry, celebrate instead. that is a very good sign.

That is what everyone should do. Remember death is not the end. (if you believe what you belueve.)
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Ching

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #6 on: March 15, 2010, 12:25:05 AM »
sure it will come, only time can tell

chicogon

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #7 on: March 15, 2010, 05:06:06 AM »

I don't think there's anything wrong with you... that's all I can say. I buried one of my grandfathers (I missed the one on my father's side), both my grandmothers and my mother. To my surprise, wa na sad ko makahilak not like when we were still holding on sa himatyon pa sila (kadto nuoy maoy kuyaw and cried a lot of tears). Di sad ko ka explain why... in retrospect, I tell a lot of people, maybe, mao na toy summation sa atong pagtoo: faith in everlasting life, in a God who is good and who loves us no matter what and so forth. Personally I don't ask a lot of questions and rack my brain looking for answers.... I simply place myself on God's mercy and providence. And He does provide!!! I hope ning akong tampo makatabang pod gamay sa imong gibati...

Addendum: maybe this is what we call maturity and the acceptance of the reality that one day we will all be caput!!! Or ngani jud siguro ning nagka tiguwang na bwahahaha!!! (Sowee for the pakatok)
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jorgeanna

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #8 on: March 15, 2010, 12:29:21 PM »

salamat sa word of wisdom nmo Pads... tinood gyud ka nga katong medyo bedridden cya, sige ko hilak gyud salabi nga wala ko sa kilid niya...

Ching

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #9 on: March 15, 2010, 05:35:34 PM »
tinuod na, that happens to me, days nga padong na mongpanaw sige ug hilak pero sa pagka wa na hinoon, wa nay luha nga ikahilak, left with the  feeling of sadness & no tears. sakit sa bout pero wa joy luha

Lorenzo

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #10 on: March 16, 2010, 01:34:36 AM »

There is nothing wrong. The important thing is that you coped with death. Different people cope with death in different ways. Many cry, many stay silent, many pray and accept it, there are many intricacies of how the mind deals and copes with death. As it is a complex issue; one that is studied.

The most important thing, Anna, is that you have dealt with it, or are dealing with it in your own way. Continue to be strong.


Lorenzo.

jorgeanna

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #11 on: March 16, 2010, 08:58:30 AM »

thanks sa words of wisdom...

Lorenzo

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Re: Is there somthing wrong with me?
« Reply #12 on: March 31, 2010, 11:18:53 AM »

I want to share with you a quote from the late Randy Pausch, Professor at Carnegie Mellon University:
"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand."


In all things, friend, always carry strength and reason in your choices. Reason to decide what is right and wrong; and the strength to live by your choices, whatever it may be.



In Christ,
Lorenzo.



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