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The 10 Sweet Nothings a Man Needs to Hear
« on: April 09, 2013, 09:39:46 AM »
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In a relationship, it's not only women who like to hear that they look nice, or that they're wanted. Whether it's a simple compliment to kick off his day or something deeper, these affirmations will strengthen your bond. By Brie Schwartz, REDBOOK.

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...than to speak out and remove all doubt." - Abraham Lincoln

hubag bohol

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Re: The 10 Sweet Nothings a Man Needs to Hear
« Reply #1 on: April 09, 2013, 09:40:12 AM »
"You look handsome"

It may sound obvious, but men enjoy a good ego-stroking, especially when they're not trying to impress. "Whenever my fiancé groggily tells me I look nice in the morning, before I head out the door for work, it makes me feel unstoppable for the rest of the day," says New Yorker Charles C., 30. "It's one thing to hear it if we're going out to a nice place, but when she tells me I look dapper when I'm on my way to the office, it gives me a renewed confidence."

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Re: The 10 Sweet Nothings a Man Needs to Hear
« Reply #2 on: April 09, 2013, 09:40:39 AM »
"Thank you"

It's easy to overlook the small gestures, like when he swaps out his toothbrush head for yours or straightens up the apartment even if you're not having friends over. Instead of issuing a passive aggressive, "it's about time!" thank him. "Catch him doing something right every day," says says Lisa L. Payne, life transitions coach and author of What If They Knew: Secrets of an Impressive Woman. "Whether it's that he made your coffee just the way you like it, or holds the door for you, tell him how much you appreciate his efforts and, above all, be specific about what he did and how it made you feel. That way, he'll know exactly what he's done well, and he'll do it more often."

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Re: The 10 Sweet Nothings a Man Needs to Hear
« Reply #3 on: April 09, 2013, 09:41:06 AM »
"I trust you"

You've probably got this one covered, but communicating it is all in the timing. "The best time to share your feelings with your guy is just before or during sex," says Georgianna Donadio, PhD, relationship expert and author of Changing Behavior: Immediately Transform Your Relationships with Easy to Learn Proven Communication Skills. "At that time, levels of oxytocin, a hormone that enhances feelings of trust, love and intimacy, are elevated, making it the very best moment to love talk with your partner. It's also the ideal time to let him know what you want from him in the relationship, as he will be the most receptive and open."

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Re: The 10 Sweet Nothings a Man Needs to Hear
« Reply #4 on: April 09, 2013, 09:41:31 AM »
"I'm on your side"

"Find a way to let your partner know, on a daily basis, that you're in his corner," says Dr. Shannon Kolakowski, psychologist and author of the forthcoming book, When Depression Hurts Your Relationship. "You might show your loyalty by standing up for your guy when he feels the world is against him. Let him know you support what he's passionate about. Show him that you value what he values. This adds a sense of teamwork, security, and intimacy to your relationship."

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Re: The 10 Sweet Nothings a Man Needs to Hear
« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2013, 09:41:50 AM »
"I'm listening"

Men communicate differently than women, tending toward reticence when they're upset. When this happens, don't badger him, but do let him know that you're there for him, and when he does begin to talk through his issues, don't interrupt him or offer any unsolicited opinions. Let him feel safe and unjudged. According to Mindfulness and Acceptance: Expanding the Cognitive-Behavioral Tradition, couples that really hear each other are happier in their relationships, and experience lower levels of depression and anxiety.

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Re: The 10 Sweet Nothings a Man Needs to Hear
« Reply #6 on: April 09, 2013, 09:42:14 AM »
"Good morning. Let's get frisky!"
 
Perhaps you shouldn't use that quote verbatim, but let him know that if he wants to be intimate with you, he needs to set the stage in the morning. According to Sharyn Wolf, LCSW, marriage counselor and author of How to Stay Lovers for Life, you've got to "stroke the mind before you stroke the behind." If you want to have sex that night, foreplay begins that morning, so send him suggestive texts throughout the day. He'll get the idea.

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Re: The 10 Sweet Nothings a Man Needs to Hear
« Reply #7 on: April 09, 2013, 09:42:40 AM »
"I'm sorry"

My fiancé and I are fortunate enough that we don't fight (too) often, and when we do' it's usually hunger-induced. However, when I am driven to the point of crazy and my low blood sugar turns into an assassination of his character, I need to remember to leave the room, take a few deep breaths - or sips of wine - and apologize. When an irrational fight arises out of a silly situation, the best thing to do is to apologize before it escalates into something bigger, and a lot meaner. He's not always the enemy. Sometimes hormones, or even lack of calories are the culprits.

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Re: The 10 Sweet Nothings a Man Needs to Hear
« Reply #8 on: April 09, 2013, 09:43:05 AM »
"Your friends are fun"

There are nights you'd much prefer to stay home with a Say Yes to the Dress marathon than endure hours of beer-guzzling with his former frat brothers, but these guys are a part of his past and it's important to let him know that you love every aspect of him - even if you're glad he's grown up a bit since his keg-stand days. "Going to his social events or family functions makes you see your boyfriend through other people's eyes and remember why you started dating him," says Lucie V., 29, of San Francisco, CA.


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