Author Topic: How to mend a broken heart  (Read 1479 times)

jorgeanna

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How to mend a broken heart
« on: September 26, 2009, 11:59:56 AM »
People may say no one ever died of a broken heart, but when you're suffering from one, it sure doesn't feel that way--at least initially. These suggestions may help you navigate the painfully troubled waters of a relationship that has ended and help you heal a broken heart.

Day 1 and 2
Step 1 Breathe. All you can do is survive this first and difficult day. Take one day at a time. Give yourself permission to mourn. Call in sick at work, sleep all day, eat too much ice cream, sob.

Step 2 Congratulate yourself for being human: It is only when you open yourself to love that your heart can break. Develop and repeat a helpful mantra to get you through the initial shock and pain, such as "This too shall pass" or "I will survive."

Step 3 Reach out to a close friend or family member. It helps to share your thoughts with others. Watch a movie to distract yourself. Choose a comedy that has cheered you up in the past. Or watch a movie that's guaranteed to make you sob--it may surprise you how good that feels.

Month 1
Step 1 Week 1: Force yourself to go out even if you are feeling despondent. Take yourself out for a cup of coffee or go on a long walk. Express your emotions in a way that comes naturally. Write in a journal, paint, sculpt or play music. Do daily cardiovascular exercise--the endorphins will give your spirits an immediate lift. Resist the urge to call your ex. Instead, write a letter. Don't mail it. Go out of town for the weekend to distance yourself from the temptation to call your ex. Visit an old friend or go back home to your roots. A change of environment does wonders for the spirit. Put everything that reminds you of your ex in a box and seal it. Throw it away, donate it to charity or ask a friend to hold on to it indefinitely.

Step 2 Week 2: Surround yourself with friends. This may mean reaching out to people you fell out of touch with during the relationship. Make lists to help you regain your confidence and identity: a list of your friends, of things you like, of what you want to accomplish in the next decade. Spoil yourself: Get a new hairstyle, have a spa day or go shopping. Resist the urge to call your ex.

Step 3 Week 3: Assess the experience. Have you learned anything about yourself? Does the experience make you more empathetic to others who've suffered a hardship? Begin an activity that will fill your time, distract your mind and rebuild your confidence. Train for a marathon, take up yoga or learn a new language. Resist the urge to call your ex. Volunteer your time at a local homeless shelter, soup kitchen or tutoring center. It will take your mind off your own woes and keep your suffering in perspective.

Step 4 Week 4: Continue regular socializing and exercising. While socializing, though, make sure you don't depend on alcohol or drugs to dull the pain. Call your ex if you feel it would be helpful. Resist if you merely want to say hurtful things. Consider dating other people, but be wary of rebound relationships. Understand that you will need to experience and process sadness, anger, guilt and fear to fully heal. Burying or ignoring these emotions will thwart the healing process. Write, cry, share the feelings with friends.

Months 3 to 6
Step 1 Force yourself to go on dates. You'll be surprised to discover that your heart can still flutter over someone. It's part of the healing process.

Step 2 Consult a psychiatrist if you are experiencing symptoms of depression, such as lack of appetite, insomnia or too much sleeping, low self-esteem, and an inability to concentrate or carry out routine tasks. Ask a friend or physician to recommend one who is experienced in treating depression.

Step 3 Remember that healing is a process that takes time. Expect waves of sadness, anger, guilt or fear even after you think you are over it. Give your heart time to heal.

One year and beyond
Step 1 Compartmentalize the experience in your memory: "My heart was broken once. It really hurt and I'm glad it's over."

Step 2 Reach out to your ex if you want to re-establish a friendship. Do not harbor secret ambitions of winning him or her back. You'll only set yourself up for another heartbreak.


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mistyeyed

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #1 on: September 26, 2009, 01:28:13 PM »
Do not harbor secret ambitions of winning him or her back. You'll only set yourself up for another heartbreak.


Dodong Tigs, para imoha ni nga lines..timan-e ni. ;D ;D

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"You will be happy if you're living the truth...as the truth will set you free"

Keep Smiling :)

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taga tigbao

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #2 on: October 08, 2009, 05:14:07 PM »
Do not harbor secret ambitions of winning him or her back. You'll only set yourself up for another heartbreak.


Dodong Tigs, para imoha ni nga lines..timan-e ni. ;D ;D

Hahahaha. Mating wa ko kakita ani da. Hahahaha

Mas okay na ko te. I dont hope nga mobalik pa. Lakaw na ko ug aho. ;D

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sab_sad

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #3 on: October 08, 2009, 05:25:51 PM »
naks! dugaya nako kabasa ani dah! maU rapud kay kas man d i nig kwarta! waaahhh  ;D ;D ;D

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mistyeyed

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #4 on: October 08, 2009, 05:35:41 PM »
Bwahhaha..Na broken ba diay imong heart Sab?

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hofelina

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #5 on: October 08, 2009, 05:36:52 PM »
Imagine this scenario;
Man " I will leave you because I have a new found love, younger and better".
Woman schocked, " Okay you know we have 2 kids, 7 and 18". Go your way and good luck!"
The woman tried her best to pull through, this is not simply a broken heart, its a family breaking down!

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #6 on: October 08, 2009, 05:43:45 PM »
Imagine this scenario;
Man " I will leave you because I have a new found love, younger and better".
Woman schocked, " Okay you know we have 2 kids, 7 and 18". Go your way and good luck!"
The woman tried her best to pull through, this is not simply a broken heart, its a family breaking down!

Sakto ni Manay, there are a lot of things here on Earth nga atong naexperience. We thought nga mao nay pinakabug-at nga mga problema ba pero wa lamang ta kahibawomas daghan pa ang mas bug-at ug problema kaysa nato.

Mura ni sa phrase nga kadto bitaw gusto sija ug sapatos not until he saw a man without legs or leg lamang ba? Dili ko sure.

Lisud jud ang pagsunod sa lakang sa Ginoo ba. Faith ra gajud, faith. Which is sometimes lisud ( o mas lisud) nga makuha, but with His guidance and blessings, everyone of us are bound to have such faith.

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hofelina

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #7 on: October 08, 2009, 05:47:59 PM »
continuation;

That woman was me, it happened 9 years ago. My daughter is now an engineer and my boy turned 16 today, you can see them in my avatar.
Problems big and small will always be solved. Trust Him. ;)

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sab_sad

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #8 on: October 08, 2009, 05:48:51 PM »
Bwahhaha..Na broken ba diay imong heart Sab?

broken molng??maU nlng gani kay internal cya nahamutang..og external pa goro murag bildo nagtingkagay! (heeh! lawom npud hapit npudko malumos ;D)


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Hungry not only for bread - but hungry for love. Naked not only for clothing - but naked for human dignity and respect. Homeless not only for want of a room of bricks - but homeless because of rejection.

"Mother Teresa: Quotes on Sacrifice"

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #9 on: October 08, 2009, 05:49:47 PM »
continuation;

That woman was me, it happened 9 years ago. My daughter is now an engineer and my boy turned 16 today, you can see them in my avatar.
Problems big and small will always be solved. Trust Him. ;)

I ber your stronger than me Manay. Saludar ko nimo. ;D

Unta lagi ug marealize lamang gajud ni ba. Unta..

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jorgeanna

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #10 on: October 10, 2009, 10:56:20 AM »
wala na gyud ko na broken hearted ever since naminyo ko.. i think blessing nga na-minyo ko

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mistyeyed

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #11 on: October 10, 2009, 01:19:58 PM »
broken molng??maU nlng gani kay internal cya nahamutang..og external pa goro murag bildo nagtingkagay! (heeh! lawom npud hapit npudko malumos ;D)



Naku pasalamat jud diay nga tago ang nahimutangan sa heart. ;D

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Lorenzo

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Re: How to mend a broken heart
« Reply #12 on: October 11, 2009, 11:12:06 AM »
How to mend a broken heart?

Write! Talk! Share it.

Its a process. You'll get through.

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