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Author Topic: Text Jokes  (Read 31754 times)

Happy

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #80 on: November 16, 2007, 11:14:53 PM »
Hahaha ok-ok manka mawjood imo man gipun-an ;D

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mawjood

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #81 on: November 20, 2007, 12:05:46 PM »
Hahaha ok-ok manka mawjood imo man gipun-an ;D

Napun-an ba to abi nako ug mao jud to ang original, naloko diay pod ko, LOL
O nia pay usa

DOKTOR: (sa pasyente) Iho usa ka sa kandidato sa mga pagawason na kay naayo ka na sa imong sakit. Duna koy mga pangutana nga kinahanglan imong matubag para ma confirm nato nga insakto ang among desisyon.

PASYENTE:sige dok, dali-a kay naghinam na gyud kong makauli sa amo, gimingaw na ko akong asawa

DOKTOR: sige kay gimmingaw man kaha ka sa imong asawa, anang bahina akong mga pangutana.Inig kakita nimo sa imong asawa, unsa may imong pinaka unang buhaton.

PASYENTE: syempre dok, gakson ug hugot, hawkan ug dugay unya inig ka taud-taud huboan dayon ug sinina

DOKTOR: pagkahuman ug hubo sa sinina, unsa pay isunod nimo nga buhaton

PASYENTE: ikaw gyud dok, mora pod ka ug ignoy, kuhaan gud sa bra unya tilapan ang n***les, kahibaw na ka sunod dok ayaw na ko pangutan-a

DOKTOR: kinahanglan makasiguro mi nga nabut-an na ka, unsay pay imong sunod nga buhaton, aber

PASYENTE: gibinuangan gyod ko nimo dok da, huboan gud sa p***ty, mao na to (lipay na ang dagway)

DOKTOR: pagkahuman unsa pay sunod

PASYENTE:kuhaon nako ang garter sa p***ty himoong pitik



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Barbaro

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #82 on: November 23, 2007, 12:12:05 PM »
Anak: Daddy, ngano sige man ga-agulo si Mommy kada gabie?
Daddy: Wala lang nak happy lang siya..
Anak: Mao bah? Imo buot pasabot kada gabie cya happy bisag katong naa paka SAUDI!


wahahah ahak na...

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Glen

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #83 on: November 24, 2007, 07:27:39 AM »
Hahahhaaaa! hala na sakpan si mommy naka ubo jod sija ni Daddy ;D

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You can never really live anyone else's life, not even your child's.
   The influence you exert is through your own life, and what you've
      become yourself.

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #84 on: November 24, 2007, 12:19:15 PM »
BANA: Day, kung unsa gani mahitabo human sa operasyon ayaw pasagdi atong
mga anak ha? i love you day....
ASAWA: hilom dinha, ka OA nimo walay namatay sa TULI oy!......PISOTA KA!.............


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Glen

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #85 on: November 24, 2007, 12:24:39 PM »
Hahhaa..ang pisot maka anak diay?
Abi man ko dile..Ka tigulang napod ni Daddy nag pa tuli.

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You can never really live anyone else's life, not even your child's.
   The influence you exert is through your own life, and what you've
      become yourself.

Barbaro

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #86 on: November 24, 2007, 12:39:18 PM »
SUKO SA MISTER:
Mrs 1: Suko na ako sa mister ko, lagi na lang ako binubugbog bago niroromansa...
Mrs 2: Mas grabe yung mister ko. Binubugbog ako tapos si Inday ang niroromansa.




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hazel

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #87 on: November 27, 2007, 05:59:26 AM »
Nagpa-blood test si Tulume.
Kumuha ng sample ang nars. Pagkatapos, walang
makitang bulak ang nars sinipsip ng nars ang daliri
ni Tulume. Naligayahan si Tulume kaya sinabihan
niya ang nars, "Magpapa-urine test din ako!"  


hahaha unsaon nalang ug gi aids?

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Happy

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #88 on: November 27, 2007, 06:05:44 AM »
Hahhaa..ang pisot maka anak diay?
Abi man ko dile..Ka tigulang napod ni Daddy nag pa tuli.

Siyempre Glen oi.. bisan dili tinoli maka-anak jud kay naa man sperm.

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #89 on: December 05, 2007, 07:07:38 AM »
Kapag may kudeta sa Pilipinas:
American: We fully support the administration.
Aussie: We will send troops to the Philippines.
Chinese: We're ready to help end the political crisis.
Japanese: We condemn any unconstitutional grab of power.
Pinoy: May pasok ba?




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Barbaro

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #90 on: December 06, 2007, 05:01:50 AM »
Bisaya to english:
PEDRO;bay Juan,onsay english sa IRO nga naligsan?
JUAN: IRO nga naligsan?kowan bay,DOG-MOK
PEDRO:sa iring nga naligsan bay?
JUAN:CAT-TAG
PEDRO:sa baboy nga naligsan unsa man sad?
JUAN:e di PIG-SAT


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hazel

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #91 on: December 06, 2007, 05:06:14 AM »

now i remember the iro joke...ni paghot ug 1million. hehehhehehehhehe



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ms da binsi

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #92 on: December 06, 2007, 11:34:25 AM »

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #93 on: December 10, 2007, 09:53:37 PM »
Wife: Ninakawan tayo ng katulong ng towel nung umalis siya.
Husband: Mga tao ngayon wala ng values. Anong towel kinuha nya?
Wife: Yung sa Manila Hotel.


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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #94 on: December 11, 2007, 01:03:35 AM »
Wife: Ninakawan tayo ng katulong ng towel nung umalis siya.
Husband: Mga tao ngayon wala ng values. Anong towel kinuha nya?
Wife: Yung sa Manila Hotel.







hahahhahhahahhahhahahhhahahhahhahaahhhahhhaa!!!!!

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #95 on: December 11, 2007, 01:14:13 AM »
Asa ang grief

Anak: Tay, hain akong grief?
Tatay: Kaw bataa ka, dili ka gihapon kabalo. Brief lagi dili grief.
Anak: Aw, hain man Tay?
Tatay: Tua sa kwarto. Gi-hammer!




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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #96 on: December 11, 2007, 03:44:38 AM »
wehehhehehhehehehhehehehehehhhe

Barbaro dia ra imong HAMMER!!!





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Scarb

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #97 on: December 11, 2007, 04:09:24 AM »
Anak; Unsay escalator, Tay ?
Tatay: Hagdan saka kanaog.

Anak: Kanang elevator?
Tatay: Kahon sakyan saka kanaog.

Anak: Calculator, Tay?
Tatay: Kana, wa pa ko kasakay ;D

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #98 on: December 11, 2007, 04:16:38 AM »
wehehhehehhehehhehehhehheheh



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Scarb

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #99 on: December 11, 2007, 04:50:21 AM »
ERAP: Soli ko tong nabili kong DVD.
FPJ: Anong problema?
> > ERAP: Walang picture, tsaka sound. Sayang. Suspense thriller pa yata ito

 FPJ: Anong title?
> > ERAP: "The Lens Cleaner"
 ;D ::)

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hazel

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #100 on: December 11, 2007, 05:38:31 AM »
wehehhehehhehehehhehehehehehhhe

Barbaro dia ra imong HAMMER!!!





hehehhehehehhe dakoa sa grief nga gi hammer oi...

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #101 on: December 11, 2007, 05:43:27 AM »

Barbaro

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #102 on: December 11, 2007, 07:40:47 PM »
wehehhehehhehehehhehehehehehhhe

Barbaro dia ra imong HAMMER!!!




wahahaha ingon ana gyod akong hammer diri..
pero dili nako i hammer akong grief ani oi. malawlaw ug dali..



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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #103 on: December 12, 2007, 12:37:38 AM »
hahaahhahhahahhahhahhah


barbs tagai ra gud ko anang imong emoticon nga mag ligidligid ug katawa...

gitagaan ko ni ginger sa ijaha lain man ang ning gawas diri...

di dagway kasabot ug norwegian ni akong computer...


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hazel

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #104 on: December 12, 2007, 12:47:39 AM »

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #105 on: December 12, 2007, 10:28:35 AM »
wahehehehhehehehehhehe

Gitan-aw ko sa akong mga office mates deri kay mikalit ko ug agik-ik abi nila natuk-an ko kay mikalit man pod ko undang. bahala na basta malingaw ta, nakakita na baya ko ug grief nga gi hammer, lawlaw bitaw, bwahahahaha ;D

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #106 on: December 12, 2007, 12:23:38 PM »
wahahhahahhahhahha


Mawjood mora ko ug gigitik nimo hahahhaha

hala daghan na tang patumaron ug *barbiturates ani...




*sedative drug: one of a class of barbituric acid derivatives with sedative and hypnotic properties
Encarta ® World English Dictionary © & (P) 1998-2004 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.


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Barbaro

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #107 on: December 12, 2007, 06:58:32 PM »
Muslim: Palit naka mo sa perfume nga snow white and seven dwarfs, humot kaayo.
Kustomer: Pre! baho man lagi ning usa ka garapa, Muslim: Ooooy! namatay man god ang usa ka dwarf.




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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #108 on: December 12, 2007, 07:16:54 PM »
Muslim: Palit naka mo sa perfume nga snow white and seven dwarfs, humot kaayo.
Kustomer: Pre! baho man lagi ning usa ka garapa, Muslim: Ooooy! namatay man god ang usa ka dwarf.



whahahahahahahahahhahaah
tabang Barbs....ohh my golly...u really make my dayyyyy....

bahahahaha kining mga Muslim ky dli jud na sila mawad-an ug "selling-tricks"

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #109 on: December 12, 2007, 07:22:30 PM »
Son: Ma, bakit kayo tumatalbog sa
ibabaw ni daddy??

Mom: Wala anak, pinapaliit ko lang tiyan ng Daddy mo.

Son: Nye! Mapapagod ka lang kasi hinihipan din uli yan
ni yaya!


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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #110 on: December 12, 2007, 08:54:23 PM »
Gitan-aw ko sa akong mga office mates deri kay mikalit ko ug agik-ik abi nila natuk-an ko kay mikalit man pod ko undang. bahala na basta malingaw ta, nakakita na baya ko ug grief nga gi hammer, lawlaw bitaw, bwahahahaha ;D

mawjood, mura nato ug shorts...hahahah pwede nang i-basketball.

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hazel

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #111 on: December 12, 2007, 08:56:00 PM »
Son: Ma, bakit kayo tumatalbog sa
ibabaw ni daddy??

Mom: Wala anak, pinapaliit ko lang tiyan ng Daddy mo.

Son: Nye! Mapapagod ka lang kasi hinihipan din uli yan
ni yaya!


hahahahahhahahahaha nag kulo kadidang si dadi ug si yaya...

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #112 on: December 13, 2007, 12:40:50 AM »

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #113 on: December 13, 2007, 12:12:55 PM »
Asawa: Kab-i kog tubig kay maligo ko.
Bana: Pagkabog imo!
Asawa: Maligo ko kay mag-kuan ta.
Bana: Baldi bi!






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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #114 on: December 13, 2007, 12:26:43 PM »
Asawa: Kab-i kog tubig kay maligo ko.
Bana: Pagkabog imo!
Asawa: Maligo ko kay mag-kuan ta.
Bana: Baldi bi!


wakiki... hehehehehee--hahahahaha... moot! dah! abtik na lage... :)

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Barbaro

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #115 on: December 14, 2007, 04:21:33 PM »
Si Bungol, si Libat ug si Buta nagsabot nga manan-aw sila ug sine kay wala pa gayud sila kasud ug sinehan sukad-sukad. Maong sa paglingkud nila sa sulod sa Vision Theater:

Bungol: (misyagit) Balik pulta, walay sound, walay sound hoy psssst!

Libat: (misyagit sab) Kuwadro! Kuwadro!

Buta: Hoy mga kolokoy! Wala pa gani magsugod!


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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #116 on: December 14, 2007, 04:59:06 PM »
Logical consequences are the scarecrows of fools and the beacons of wise men. ~ Thomas Henry Huxley~

Romans 10:9
"That if you shall confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and shall believe in your heart that God has raised him from the dead, you shall be saved."
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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #117 on: December 14, 2007, 09:05:54 PM »
Asawa: Kab-i kog tubig kay maligo ko.
Bana: Pagkabog imo!
Asawa: Maligo ko kay mag-kuan ta.
Bana: Baldi bi!



hahahhahaha sayon ra diay.

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #118 on: December 15, 2007, 12:55:07 AM »
Asawa: Kab-i kog tubig kay maligo ko.
Bana: Pagkabog imo!
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wahhehehehheheehehheh!!!!

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Scarb

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Re: TEXT JOKS
« Reply #119 on: December 15, 2007, 02:41:57 AM »
MADRE:

dalawang madre nirereyp ng goons....

Madre 1: Jusko, patawarin mo po sila...hindi nila nalalaman ang kanilang ginagawa!

Madre2: Ay, yung sa akin marunong!!!!


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Logical consequences are the scarecrows of fools and the beacons of wise men. ~ Thomas Henry Huxley~

Romans 10:9
"That if you shall confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and shall believe in your heart that God has raised him from the dead, you shall be saved."
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