Author Topic: How to forgive those who have hurt you (Read 1652 times)

Lorenzo · « **on:** August 02, 2013, 09:56:51 AM »

Learning how to forgive others is one of the most unnatural duties in the Christian life.

It goes against our human nature. Forgiving is a supernatural act that Jesus Christ was capable of, but when we are hurt by someone, we want to hold a grudge. We want justice. Sadly, we don't trust God with that.

There is a secret to successfully living the Christian life, however, and that same secret applies when we're struggling with how to forgive.

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #1 on:** August 02, 2013, 09:57:12 AM »

How to Forgive: Understanding Our Worth

We are all wounded. We are all inadequate. On our best days, our self-esteem hovers somewhere between feeble and fragile. All it takes is disapprovalâ€”or perceived disapprovalâ€”to send us staggering. These attacks bother us because we forget who we really are.

As believers, you and I are forgiven children of God. We have been lovingly adopted into his royal family as his sons and daughters. Our true worth comes from our relationship to him, not from our appearance, our performance or our net worth. When we remember that truth, criticism bounces off us like BBs ricocheting off a rhino. The trouble is that we forget.

We seek others' approval. When they reject us instead, it hurts. By taking our eyes off God and his acceptance and putting them on the conditional acceptance of our boss, spouse, or friend, we set ourselves up to be hurt. We forget that other people are incapable of unconditional love.

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #2 on:** August 02, 2013, 09:57:51 AM »

How to Forgive: Understanding Others

Even when other people's criticism is valid, it's still hard to take. It reminds us that we have failed in some way. We didn't measure up to their expectations, and often when they remind us of that, tact is low on their priority list.

Sometimes our critics have ulterior motives. An old proverb from India goes, "Some men try to be tall by cutting off the heads of others." They try to make themselves feel better by making others feel bad. You have probably had the experience of being put down by a nasty remark. When that happens, it is easy to forget that others are broken just like us.

Jesus understood the brokenness of the human condition. No one knows the human heart like him. He forgave tax collectors and prostitutes, and forgave his best friend Peter, for betraying him. On the cross, he even forgave the people who killed him. He knows that humansâ€”all humansâ€”are weak.

For us, though, it usually doesn't help to know that those who have hurt us are weak. All we know is that we were injured and we can't seem to get over it. Jesus' command in the Lord's Prayer seems too hard to obey: "And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." (Mark 6:12)

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #3 on:** August 02, 2013, 09:59:23 AM »

How to Forgive: Understanding the Trinity's Role

When we have been hurt, our instinct is to hurt back. We want to make the other person pay for what they did. But exacting revenge steps over the line into God's territory, as Paul warned,

Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. (Romans 12:19)

If we cannot take revenge, then we must forgive. God commands it. But how? How can we let it go when we have been unjustly hurt?

The answer lies in understanding the Trinity's role in forgiveness. Christ's role was to die for our sins. God the Father's role was to accept Jesus' sacrifice on our behalf and forgive us. Today, the Holy Spirit's role is to enable us to do those things in the Christian life we cannot do on our own, namely forgive others because God has forgiven us.

Refusing to forgive leaves an open wound in our soul that festers into bitterness, resentment, and depression. For our own good, and the good of the person who hurt us, we simply must forgive. Just as we trust God for our salvation, we have to trust him to make things right when we forgive. He will heal our wound so we can move on.

Rolling our burdens onto the Lordâ€”that's the secret of the Christian life, and the secret of how to forgive. Trusting God. Depending on him instead of ourselves. It's a hard thing but not a complicated thing. It's the only way we can truly forgive.

Reference:
http://christianity.about.com/od/topicaldevotions/a/How-To-Forgive.htm

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hubag bohol · « **Reply #4 on:** August 02, 2013, 01:10:36 PM »

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diablo · « **Reply #5 on:** August 02, 2013, 01:16:46 PM »

i will forgive you hubs. why not. just dont show up after august 17 para di mo boil ahong blood

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hubag bohol · « **Reply #6 on:** August 02, 2013, 01:32:32 PM »

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diablo · « **Reply #7 on:** August 02, 2013, 01:35:01 PM »

nice. if you can do this after august 17, horot na jud ahong bilib nimo

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diablo · « **Reply #8 on:** August 02, 2013, 01:37:19 PM »

ayaw kabaka hubs. nia pa sa new york atong shoting. mo abot ra lagi ta sa pinas. huwat lang

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diablo · « **Reply #9 on:** August 02, 2013, 01:38:44 PM »

atimana nang imong negosyo. para di ka ma bankrupt pareha naho

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hubag bohol · « **Reply #10 on:** August 02, 2013, 06:44:17 PM »

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diablo · « **Reply #11 on:** August 02, 2013, 07:04:20 PM »

pasiatab bitaw ka nga naa kay negosyo. mo attend pa ka ug conference sa new york

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maryhazel · « **Reply #12 on:** August 02, 2013, 08:12:04 PM »

Forgive means to accept the wrongs things the person have done. Pray for strength and guidance to forgive. This is not easy but this is the only way in order to help yourself to move on and be at peace. Once you truly forgive by time you will be healed and be happy.

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diablo · « **Reply #13 on:** August 02, 2013, 08:27:52 PM »

na pasaylo na naho si hubs. di lang ko mo angay maka kita sa ijang avatar. cant help it. mo boil ahong blood

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #14 on:** August 03, 2013, 05:00:27 AM »

A Prayer for the Joy of Forgiveness

Heavenly father,
through the obedience of Jesus,
Who offered His Life in the service of all,
help me with Your Kindness.
Make me strong through the Eucharist.
May I put into action the saving Mystery
I celebrate in the Mass.
Protect me with Your Love
and prepare me for eternal happiness.

AMEN.

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #15 on:** August 03, 2013, 05:01:34 AM »

O Lord Forgive Prayer

My failure to be true even to my own accepted standards:
O Lord, forgive!
"My self-deception in the face of temptation: O Lord, forgive!
My choosing of the worse when I knew the better:
O Lord forgive!
My failure to apply to myself the standards of conduct that I demand of others;
Lord forgive!
My blindness to the suffering of others and my slowness to be taught by my own:
O Lord, forgive!
My complacence toward wrongs that do not touch my won case and my over sensitiveness to those that do:
O Lord, forgive!
My slowness to see the good in my fellows and to see the evil in myself:
O Lord forgive!
My hardness of heart toward my neighbor's faults and my readiness to make allowance for my own:
O Lord for give!
My unwillingness to believe that You have called me to a small work and my brother to a great one:
O Lord, forgive!

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #16 on:** August 05, 2013, 11:27:53 PM »

Forgive means to accept the wrongs things the person have done. Pray for strength and guidance to forgive. This is not easy but this is the only way in order to help yourself to move on and be at peace. Once you truly forgive by time you will be healed and be happy.

You are so right, Mary. Only through forgiveness can man truly heal. Forgiveness is, in itself, an act of mercy. By forgiving we honor the command of Lord Jesus Christ when he commanded us, "Be perfect like your Father Who Is In Heaven!" By Forgiving, we imitate God the Father, who forgives us through Jesus Christ Who is Our Lord.

If God can forgive us who are undeserving of His Love, we should also forgive those who trespass against us.

The Lord Jesus tells us, no, He commands us to forgive. He can endure the most horrible death for our sakes.

Can we not honor Him by forgiving others as Christ forgave us...?

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #17 on:** August 05, 2013, 11:43:53 PM »

You are so right, Mary. Only through forgiveness can man truly heal. Forgiveness is, in itself, an act of mercy. By forgiving we honor the command of Lord Jesus Christ when he commanded us, "Be perfect like your Father Who Is In Heaven!" By Forgiving, we imitate God the Father, who forgives us through Jesus Christ Who is Our Lord.

If God can forgive us who are undeserving of His Love, we should also forgive those who trespass against us.

The Lord Jesus tells us, no, He commands us to forgive. He can endure the most horrible death for our sakes.

Can we not honor Him by forgiving others as Christ forgave us...?

"Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect."

-Matthew 5:48

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diablo · « **Reply #18 on:** August 06, 2013, 07:04:10 AM »

doc,

i have already forgiven those who humiliated me. thank you so much for your advice. in a few days, i move on with my life. enjoyed my stay here in tubagbohol but it was not meant to be. sayang . gi pa balik na unta ko ni mike. was really surprised kay abi ko nga my ban was for a lifetime. mo lakaw na lang ko para way samok. unsaon nga sobra man ka mapa hitas-on ning ahong mga kontra. kong aho silang gi insulto, i was only striking back. kay mao jud ni aho. di ko mahilona kong di ko maka bawos. maayo na lang kay naa man ka nga kanunay nag maymay naho. to keep cool. i am a reasonable man. not idiot or stupid. i thought on everything you said. you are right. vengeance is the LORD's. not for us mortal men. i will not seek revenge. i will not proceed with the operation i was planning.

GOD BLESS US ALL

bals

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #19 on:** August 06, 2013, 08:24:17 AM »

doc,

i have already forgiven those who humiliated me. thank you so much for your advice. in a few days, i move on with my life. enjoyed my stay here in tubagbohol but it was not meant to be. sayang . gi pa balik na unta ko ni mike. was really surprised kay abi ko nga my ban was for a lifetime. mo lakaw na lang ko para way samok. unsaon nga sobra man ka mapa hitas-on ning ahong mga kontra. kong aho silang gi insulto, i was only striking back. kay mao jud ni aho. di ko mahilona kong di ko maka bawos. maayo na lang kay naa man ka nga kanunay nag maymay naho. to keep cool. i am a reasonable man. not idiot or stupid. i thought on everything you said. you are right. vengeance is the LORD's. not for us mortal men. i will not seek revenge. i will not proceed with the operation i was planning.

GOD BLESS US ALL

bals

Hi Nong Balong,

In whatever you do, seek the Lord always, forget not His benefits and promises. In times of joy or in times of pain, seek always the Lord. Render unto The Lord all your hopes, all your pains, all your worries.

There is a beautiful verse from Scripture it is in Book of Matthew chapter 11, which is something I want you to read:

"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."

-Matthew 11:28-29

Unsay buot ipasabot ni Lord Jesus Christ ani nato? He is telling us, Nong, to render all that afflicts you, be it mental or physical worry, pain, and just give it to Jesus. All the worries of this world is temporal and fleeting, my friend. No stress. This life in Earth is but a temporary reprieve from the eternal joy which we will receive in Heaven. Focus on Christ. And you will always find your way....

God Bless and take care !

With Love and Prayers,
Bran

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hubag bohol · « **Reply #20 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:14:54 AM »

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #21 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:27:54 AM »

Yes !

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #22 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:28:07 AM »

Love can surely rescue
A heart in deep despair,
A heart that has given up
And no longer feels God near

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #23 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:28:17 AM »

Love can breathe new meaning
When there's nothing left inside,
When there's no feeling or emotion
Just dryness in our lives

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #24 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:28:33 AM »

Love can restore new hope
After it's withered and died,
For hope is what will get us through
And love can be its guide

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #25 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:28:42 AM »

Love can run and embrace
The prodigal returning home
And the one that has come to the end,
Those hurting, lost and alone

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #26 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:28:54 AM »

For God's love is the answer
To our broken, empty lives,
As we come with an open heart,
He can dispel all the hurt inside

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #27 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:29:02 AM »

And He will heal our brokenness
And lovingly, He will bind
The wounds that have left us scarred
And bring soundness to our minds

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Lorenzo · « **Reply #28 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:29:12 AM »

So give it over to God's love,
Our lives, and all that we are
Then we will know and walk in His love,
For His love shall dwell in our hearts.

Â© By M.S.Lowndes

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hubag bohol · « **Reply #29 on:** August 06, 2013, 10:42:38 AM »

Yes, hope springs eternal...

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diablo · « **Reply #30 on:** August 07, 2013, 08:35:20 PM »

you are already FORGIVEN hubs

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diablo · « **Reply #31 on:** August 07, 2013, 08:54:50 PM »

its so hard to do, but forgiving is the right thing. i am sending mixed messages. it is up to you to sort them out

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