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jorgeanna

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By Lourd Ernest de Veyra |  Published: July 29, 2009 www.spot.ph

Ours is a society where polite small talk takes the form of inquisitions about body weight, oftentimes the spirit of levity masking impoliteness. But ours is also a culture that finds nothing wrong with wanton inquiries into our marital status, sexual preference, and other things that would make a foreigner faint. Ours is a culture that finds fault in fat (check out those short but brutal Lesofat ads). Granted, that’s what you get from too much Häagen Dazs and  double cheeseburgers, but your dining habits aren’t to blame, are they? Yes, it’s hormonal imbalance. Bad hormones!

So in the spirit of fighting fire with fire, we present 20 snappy retorts to that evil phrase “Uy, tumataba ka ‘ata.”

1.    “Bagong promo ng Belo Clinic.”
2.    “Hindi, baby fat lang ‘yan.”
3.    “Nagsarado kasi yung Fitness First sa amin.”
4.    “A sure consequence of increasing personal wealth kasi yan. Ikaw mukha ka pa ring dukha.”
5.    “That’s because I’m joining The Biggest Loser.”
6.    Rep has auditions for Falstaff.
7.    “Maganda nga abs mo, pero bobo ka pa rin.”
8.    “I know you meant no malice, but you have no idea how much you hurt my feelings.”
9.    “Fifty percent off on Thai Jasmine rice at Hi-Top Supermarket!”
10.    ‘Ever heard of the East Beach Diet?”
11.    Alam mo, sabi dati ni Roland Barthes, “Steak is part of the same sanguine mythology as wine. It is the heart of meat, it is meat in its pure state; and whoever partakes of it assimilates a bull-like strength. The prestige of steak evidently derives from quasi-rawness.  In it, blood is visible, natural, dense, at once compact and sectile… To eat steak therefore represents both a nature and morality.”
12.    “I mean, that’s just your opinion, man.”—Jeff Bridges in The Big Lebowski
13.    “Bakit ikaw mukha kang floorwax?”
14.    “Nagbasa ako ng Preview. Yan daw ang uso in the next six months.”
15.    “Which is why I’ve been taking Xenical. And I’ve got this nice, moist feeling inside my pants.”
16.    “Idol ko si Ate Shawee.”
17.    “Ah, but the curve is the most beautiful of all the lines.”
18.    “May sale kasi sa Tubby.”
19.    “Does the phrase ‘Dove Beauty’ mean anything to you?”
20.    “Tangina mo rin.”



Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=22535.0
a marriage can never be perfect.. but the love can be!

ms da binsi

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #1 on: September 22, 2009, 12:57:18 PM »
I would say...

-How dare you!!!

-NANYA!!! (non of your business B****H!)

-I like #7!
The best sermons are lived not preached.http://www.facebook.com/daBinsi

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #2 on: September 22, 2009, 12:59:37 PM »

ingnon gud "namawi kay "1 d 1 8" ra mi sa una.
We, the unwilling, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have done so much, for so long, with so little, we are now qualified to do anything with nothing.

Let us Support the Online Petition to Increase the Salary of Public School Teachers

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #3 on: September 22, 2009, 01:02:41 PM »
akong tubag ana kay....


alangan, naa gud naga maintain.... or


uso na man karon ang jumbo...
"If you ask me what I came into this life to do, I will tell you: I came to live out loud." ~ Emile Zola~  ‎(ᵔᴥᵔ)

Candijaynon

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #4 on: September 22, 2009, 10:00:23 PM »
ang tubag pod:

syempre in love gud permi mao nanambok... 8) 8) 8)

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #5 on: September 22, 2009, 10:08:32 PM »
Akong tubag ani kay Daghan pagkaon sa amoa ipanglabay na gani ang uban. Ug maniwang ko basin makaingon mo gidagmalan ko sa akong bana wala ko pakan a.Ganahan bitaw ko sa number 7.
"We may be surprised at the people we find in heaven. God has a soft spot for sinners. His standards are quite low"---Bishop Desmond Tutu

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Candijaynon

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #6 on: September 22, 2009, 10:11:40 PM »

Tama jud ka Quel. Mao pod ingon sa ahong bana nga di siya ganahan moniwang ko kay basin makaingon ako mga parents nga gidaugdaug ko nija.

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #7 on: September 22, 2009, 10:21:34 PM »
na pareha nata ani,nga dili gusto ang mga bana nga maniwang.kay ingon man ako bana ngil ad daw tan awon ang niwang,dapat gamay tambok.
"Let thy words be few"

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #8 on: September 22, 2009, 10:25:30 PM »
Mga baje ramay critical kaayo aning tambok gamay ba. Ang mga bana sa tinuod lang moangay na sila ug himsog kay sa niwang.Kung akong bana pasultion kinsa bay laki kono moangay mogakos ug skin and bones.

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #9 on: September 23, 2009, 02:10:26 AM »

that's absolutely correct, raqs.

ako bitaw, giinganan ko karon sa akong ka-officemate sa una, "what happened to your stomach". ug akong gipabudlot hinoon og samot akong tiyan. dah, lingaw sila.

akong problema lang og modako kay mosunod pod ning sakit sama sa HB ug uban pa. pero, per se, NEVAH jud ko mo-reklamo og unsay ilang comments.
Artificial Intelligence is nothing in comparison to Natural Stupidity.

jamo2x

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« Reply #10 on: September 23, 2009, 03:19:39 AM »
sikat na ang chubby (tambok) ron kay dugay dw mamatay  ;D
mao pa tambok na lng sab ko
i promise you, i'll be yours forever :)

Candijaynon

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #11 on: September 23, 2009, 12:52:54 PM »

Ajaw pud palabii Sir Jams kay lisod ra ba jud magpahijos.

hofelina

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« Reply #12 on: September 23, 2009, 05:57:09 PM »
Maigi na ang mataba , mukhang donya! ;D

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« Reply #13 on: September 24, 2009, 02:05:23 AM »
Uy! hala naunsa man nagpakita sa iyang
     chubby double chin  nga sampot  ;D

Mao ni akong tubag; "Everybody loves a teddy bear
                              warm, soft and cuddly"
                            
Every Christian has GPS -God-Provided Salvation!
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« Reply #15 on: September 24, 2009, 02:34:16 AM »
She is wearing tanga, naipit lang pag-ayo!

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #16 on: September 24, 2009, 02:35:45 AM »
T-BACK

hofelina

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« Reply #17 on: September 24, 2009, 02:40:45 AM »
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« Reply #18 on: September 24, 2009, 10:49:27 PM »
hehehehe...unsa na man lay matabunan ani tawn...kundi ang samad naman lang jud.

jamo2x

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Re: 20 Snappy Replies to the Comment, “Uy, tumataba ka ata”
« Reply #19 on: September 24, 2009, 10:50:49 PM »

wa pa diay na ajo ang samad  ;D  abi ko bag band-aid lng tabon ana  :P ;D



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