MikeLigalig.com

Quote from: lindy on August 28, 2009, 10:38:47 AM
hubs mao nay giingon ug manggihatagon ug maluloy-on sa mga nagkinahanglan

Kahinumdom ko sa joke which goes something like:

A guy was telling his friend: "Yesterday I met a beautiful girl who was begging right in Central Park. I took pity on her. I asked her how I could help her. She said she needed money to buy food. I gave her ten dollars. Man, she really broke my heart. In fact, my tears were falling while I was f*cking her."

Kini bitawng kaliwat-kaliwat, ingrained kaajo ni nga thinking sa atoa. "Ajaw pagminjo anang tawhana kay kaliwat nag ungo (o bu**** o kriminal, o tikasan)." Naa pa gani kaliwat kunog bajot.

Hinuon dili na tingali ni ron ingon ani. Kaniadto real kaajo ni when marriages were limited to a particular place, where everyone knew everyone else.

Ang minyo nga mangitang dugang mapinanggaon jud na, kay tiaw mo wala pa mahurot ang ikahatag nijang pagpangga.

Quote from: statesville on August 28, 2009, 09:59:29 AM
Hey, age is only a number.

And youth is always there for you to remember...

Quote from: Lollapalooza on August 27, 2009, 06:01:23 PM
nagsupervise lang ko sa mga students nagpractice ug sayaw for the whole day... napagaw ko ug buyag nila T_T

Unsang mga sajawa, Ms. Lolla? Traditional Filipino dances ba, as in pandanggo sa ilaw, itik-itik, etc.?

Quote from: david on Today at 02:40:08 AM
I admit that pinays marry for money, and love develop depends how old is their partner

Quote from: ms da binsi on August 28, 2009, 04:05:02 AM
akong dugangan Dave ha?

I admit that some pinays marry for money, and love develop depends how old is their partner.

And I admit some Pinays are attracted to light colored eyes foreigners! Thats the truth, with or without money.

Dugangan pa jud nato para mosamot kalami.

Some human beings marry for money, and whether love develops or not depends on many factors, not just the age of the partner.

Quote from: benelynne on August 28, 2009, 08:25:10 AM
Thanks, Bay HB.

I'm 45 (actually in December this year) and because of your post, I'll plan the next five years so I'll reach 50 having accomplished a dream, not lost it. Time really flies, it helps to keep a total perspective of life. I don't want to look back and say, "Did I just pass by without leaving a mark?"

It's nice to have goalposts, as in years, but maybe you don't have to be too literal about it. Life is like a rainbow; you move a step away and you see a different one. That's why no one looks at the same rainbow, and that's why when you change position, in space and time, the rainbow changes, too.

He he, usahay kon hilang imong ngipon, maajong pagkasangit sa stalk. Hinuon, mas kataw-anan ang dahon nga mopilit sa imong ngipon--morag pustiso sa envirommentalist (kay green man, ha ha).

Quote from: fdaray on August 28, 2009, 07:31:40 AM
Ang lami nga sabaw ibahug kadtong tinunuan labi nag utang kamunggay sinubakan ug buwad.

Kinahanglan lang nga ang kamunggay maajong pagkakampad, kanang dahon na lang jud, kay kon dali-dalion og huros unja maapilan og stalks, hait sa tutonlan, he he.

Quote from: kiamoy on August 28, 2009, 06:33:28 AM
if she is a photographer, then who takes her pictures?
naka self-timer?

The way I see it is like this: She has a lot of assistants. She would set the composition, give technical and other instructions, take her clothes off (presuming she's wearing any all along, he he), then hie off to her chosen perch, or be hoisted there. Though she doesn't click the button herself, under the circumstances she has the right to claim the resultant image as her own art work.

Quote from: Bambi on August 28, 2009, 04:06:08 AM
Ikaw hubs...nanobra gjod ning imong pagka "wise"...dali ra gjod ka makasulbad ug tigmo. lol

Unsa man English ug "gitaroyan,  beh?  haskang lawoma nga Binisaya na gjod ni   

Taroy, he he. Ang joke ani involves an older man and a young woman. Ang baje motawag sa lalaki og "manoy".  Ang mga hilabtanon would say, "Hmm, pamanoy-manoy, manoy taroy diay." Ha ha ha.

Dili baja precise ni nga usage, kay "taroy" is roughly "pierce", which means we're talking about a sharp, pointed instrument. In the case of Inday, she is being penetrated by a blunt, round-headed instrument!

George Carlin's Views on Ageing


Do you realise that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about ageing that you think in fractions.

'How old are you?' 'I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

'How old are you?' 'I'm gonna be 16!' You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life .... . You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony.. YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80's and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30 ; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there Into the 90s, you start going backwards; 'I Was JUST 92.'

Then a strange thing happens.. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. 'I'm 100 and a half!'

May we all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!


HOW TO STAY YOUNG

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.


AND ALWAYS REMEMBER :

Worry about nothing, pray about everything!!!

Nakanindot lang kay she can afford to pose nude. In this particular composition, her warm fragile living flesh offers a sharp contrast to the cold immovable rusting monstrosity that serves as both her subject and backdrop.

Quote from: hofelina on August 25, 2009, 02:42:47 PM
Maybe . . . the best kind of friend is
the kind you can sit on a porch and
swing with, never say a word, and then
walk away feeling like it was the best
conversation you've ever had.

And maybe . . . the best kind of friend is
the kind you can sit on like a porch and
swing with, never say a word, and then
walk away feeling like it was the best
ride you've ever had.

A (Self)-Portrait of Young-Oak's Daughter as an Artist

Naa ka nagpujo sa Banff karon, Bay Talboh? Or nagbakasyon lang ka diha. Sabagay summer man ron (pero tugnaw japon sa gabii)...

Quote from: talboh on August 27, 2009, 05:58:06 PM
I really agree nga pakisabaw pakibahug gyud taga bohol. Diri bitaw sa canada no sugsugon man ko sa akong mga kauban kay mohigop daw kog sabaw mobahug pa jud. unya kung magluto daw kog sud an molutaw man jud daw sa sabaw. Palusot lang pud ko nga mao ni sekreto ngano himsog og mga utukan taga bohol tungod sa sabaw. Tinuod baya pud kay mohigop na gani kog sabaw no mawala gyud akong kabuhi hehehe. Kabuhion jud sa katugnaw diri oy. 

Mao ni ang saktong sabaw para nimo, Bay Talboh.



- mako jamo ang tingsi kay wa nay tugnaw

Quote from: Lollapalooza on August 27, 2009, 06:02:38 PM
karon pa ko kabantay, TB Graduate na d i ko hehehehehe

tenk kyuw   tenk kyuw    tenk kyuw

Congrats! Dili lang hibaw-an Ms. Lolla, di ba?  Dukdok ginagmay, inom kape dinaghan, dukdok ginagmay, pasunggohon ang mga estudyante taman-taman, etc., etc., he he...

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 27, 2009, 04:30:35 PM
kugmo,pasta,calamay

tamarindo, dugos, atuli

Quote from: catalina on August 27, 2009, 02:42:59 PM
og iya oten ako ipakaon sa amigas

He he, malingaw ini ang imong amigas y otras muchachas...

Quote from: Tubag Bohol Dot Com on August 27, 2009, 05:20:13 PM
Don't judge people by their relatives.

Very sage advice.

Likewise, don't judge a person in front of his relatives. As Melanie Marquez admonished someone who criticized his brother Joey, "Don't judge my brother. He's not a book!"

Quote from: jamo2x on August 26, 2009, 11:03:15 PM
isa pa ka praktis nila ang sawsaw sa suka ang mga pritong pagkaon sama sa tortang talong, okoy (tortang bean sprouts), lumpia, etc...ako sawsaw pirmi sa toyosukasili hehe 

Lami ning okoy sa Manila, labi nag daghang sagol nga small shrimps. Kaso lang, saturated in oil ang kasagaran nilang luto. Unja didto snacks man tingali ni, dili sud-an.

Quote from: Lollapalooza on August 26, 2009, 06:10:18 PM
nakabalos na jud ko sa akong mga buluyagong students...ana pa sila nosebleed sila sa akong exam

Aguy, sweet revenge! Maajog ilong ray magdugo! 

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 27, 2009, 01:41:25 PM
pis-isda
kat-iring
piskat-sore eyes 

misty - hanap
eyed - mat-an
mistyeyed - chick

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 27, 2009, 01:15:33 PM
Naa jud ing-ana but mahibaw-an ra japon after,diba naay uban ig kamatay sa bana mabuking,naa poy uban after pila ra ka months ma buking.Basta way aso nga ma sod ug bulsa mogawas gayud.

Ang kabit morag dautan nga hangin sa tijan. Maglain ang imong paminaw kon dili kagawas. Kadaut kay kun makagawas kasagaran dili lang hangin; naay kaluhang igit.

Atong himoan og rhyme:

Sa tanto nimong tago-tago sa imong kabit
Takulahaw lang nga ikaw diay nakaigit.

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 27, 2009, 01:22:06 PM
kibot,igot2x,lubot

sampot, isol, kigol

Quote from: taga tigbao on August 27, 2009, 09:44:36 AM
Murag tinuod murag dili kay karong buntag arang ka daghan pug ug pinaakan ug lamok.
Ang nakangilngig lamang sa ahong damgo kay aho gajud konong nakit-an nga nangbuto ang mga lamok sa kabusog.

Nakadungog tingali kag buto-buto unja sa imong damgo nahimong exploding mosquitoes. Pero sa tinuod exploding buttocks diay...

 

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 27, 2009, 01:41:25 PM
pis-isda
kat-iring
piskat-sore eyes 

bees - mga bujog
song - kanta
beesong - part of the body

Quote from: taga tigbao on August 27, 2009, 08:59:16 AM

Nagdamgo ko ug daghang lamok kono gabie nga sa kadaghan hapit na ko dajungi.

Basin dili to damgo, Bay Tigs. Basin tinuod to.

Pero kon damgo man, depende sa hitsura sa mga lamok, he he. 

uli -  return
balay - house

uli-balay - utin nga gituli pero kay wala matarong pagkudlit, pagkaalim sa samad ningbalik sa pagkapisot

- embarrassed junior head

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 26, 2009, 05:09:07 PM

Naa diha ang lami sa way panit Toy. Lad-ang baya ug mo kaon ka nga naa pay panit

Sa ato pa, kon naay peeling, way feeling, ha ha ha.

Quote from: BlueAngel on August 26, 2009, 05:34:07 PM
dayon kan anay ug imbaw

kon way imbaw, tuway
tuway nga naglaway

ngipon
bag-ang
tango
bangkil
pustiso, he he

Parehas man diay ni sa pangutana kon unsay pinakalami nga parte sa kanding, ha ha ha.

Daan pa ko nga dili kaon imong buot ipasabot, ha ha ha.

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 26, 2009, 03:52:03 PM


Hahaha. Ug akoy asawa, ako diskobrehon aron mawa ang duda unya ug tinuod,panitan naku sila.

He he, mahilig jud lagi si Misty sa way panit, ...

Paghulbot, nibuhagay!

Gilok kaajo sa tilaok, he he.

Quote from: vhinz08 on August 26, 2009, 04:35:07 PM
Unsa man nga parti sa manok ang pinakalami?

Gikan sa pinakalami:

1. Batikun
2. Atay
3. Isol
4. Tinai
5. Tiil
6. Dugo
7. Skin
8. Liog
9. Wings
10. Drumstick
11. Pecho
12. Back portion
13. Head
14. Bones
15. Feathers

Quote from: Raquelproud boholana on August 25, 2009, 11:06:46 PM
Mo out of topic sa ko kadali. Pasensya na Cesar ha kaayuhan ni nimo  
Ug nagwonder mo ngano ingon ani jud ko ka suko bahin sa tubig or running water issue? kinsay di masuko ani nga sa gisugdan pa ni nga project nakaapil intawon ko ug kawot ug halos tanan taga isla sa amoa apil ug kawot from mainland to our island nagkawot ug kanal aron lubngan sa tubo nga gipadagan. Gawas sa init di lalim ang magbara,magkawot gipangpaslutan na ang kamot aron lamang naa mi tubig unja karon ang mighty people sa amoa ra ang mabulahan. Unsa may bayad sa among pagkawot ug buho (imagine ang cause way 7 km long gikawtan na ug buho para malubong ang tubo) unya ang gisuhol ra sa politico sa amoa bugas NGA segi raman basta tubig mainom jud ang importante. Unya karon si Herrera ug iya farm nabulahan samtang kami nagwonder anus a paagasan sa tubig nga diin among gihaguan.

Salamat sa imong pagpasabot sa imong punto, Raqz. It might be personal but it's valid nonetheless.

Anyway, abi naho og kaning mga Herrera taga Cebu. Bol-anon ba jud ni silang tinuod, o nakapalit lag yuta dinhi sa Bohol? Kini nga Herrera, nagdaku ba jud ni sa ato?

Quote from: Angie Gulle on August 26, 2009, 03:25:19 PM
Oi! murag hapit ra ba ko kada adlaw na dri straight og inum for 3days na. Cognac and tequila.

Dangerous, tsk, tsk.

Kinahanglan whisky ug vodka na pud!

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 26, 2009, 01:42:45 PM
Matod pa nila ang asawa daw naay instinct,bisan di kita maka feel nga gabinuang ang bana.

Ibali-wala ang duda sa buotan nga asawa
Kay basin bunga ra ni sa taman nijang paghigugma.

Quote from: taga tigbao on August 26, 2009, 02:20:47 PM
mura man ning nabundakan ug nahagbungan unja napaud.

Pwede pud gipaud una, dajon gidabudabohan...

Quote from: bol-anon nga cebuano on August 26, 2009, 01:06:42 AM
turjack, sampikoy, sangkigoy, yoyot, lambang

arit, hisa, syumoy, sampak

Quote from: lindy on August 26, 2009, 03:31:13 AM
pero daghang mga asawa motolerate na sa ilang mga bana nga dunay lain. moingon na lang basta dili ka pakita.

Mao ni nakalahi sa bisyo nga baje ug bisyo nga inom. Sa baje makapanghugas ug makapanrapo man ka. Pero kon mouli kang hubog, dili ka kapangulipas.

Quote from: Bambi on August 25, 2009, 11:52:06 PM
morag mao ni bunaw-bunawan sa itlog?  oh sorry..wrong position diay.

Kinahanglan man pud og acrobatic skills ning posisyona, Ms. Bambs. Mas sayon kon ang buna ni Ondoy maoy mopakong-pakong sa bunabuna ni Inday.

natuwad, nalimbuwad, nabalintong, natikay-ang, natikalbong

Maajo ning sakjanana kay dili pwede magpakusog. Nah, kon kusog modagan, peligro sa disgrasya. Maparehas jud ni sa report nga gihatag sa usa ka pasahero sa Agusan nga nalambigit sa aksidente:

"Adto ko Mutuan, akay ko nyep, otenta mlete. Utog ayo dagan, wa brip-brip. Abot kulbada, iy*t bitaw ligid, ah, mumo mi. Da, mungi lagi mi."

It's a nice thing for a marriage to last. A golden wedding anniversary is no doubt an amazing feat. If a man and a woman truly love each other and wish to live together forever, each one growing stronger in close physical and emotional proximity to the other, well and good. But the focus should be the welfare of the persons involved, not the definition of the tie that binds them. Indeed, it's more desirable to have the human beings brought together by marriage to survive as persons, as individuals, whole and wholesome, with their faculties intact, with the smile of insouciance neatly framed by the wrinkles of experience. There's no greater hypocrisy than presenting a marriage as apparently intact, happy and strong for all and sundry to admire, and yet with the principals involved therein wallowing in self-loathing and despair, cursing each other and God and God knows who else, only because church and society would remind them time and again that they don't have option to be honest in their fallibility.

Quote from: Bambi on August 25, 2009, 05:43:05 PM

Yes, "Pasiyotpatipuwit" awww....Physiotherapeut diay!   

Oi, lain na pud nga addition sa ahong vocabulary.

Unsa ni, pasiyot-pati-puwit? Pwede pud pasiyot-tira-paiyot!

gikawat gikuot giwiwi gikulkog gikulitog gibukiki gibulikat

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 25, 2009, 04:45:12 PM

Ug akoy asawa,moingon nalang ko ug ilisi nalang ko ayaw dugangi aron maka tilaw pod kog lain,ikaw ra kabalo?tsure ka?

Mao bitaw nga dili pahibaw-on...

Quote from: Raquelproud boholana on August 25, 2009, 08:41:28 PM
Bahala ug si Chatto injo butuhan mas labing maayo si Ceasar nalang basta ayaw lang si Herrera.

Sorry nga medjo out of touch ko sa issues. Unsa man diay ang apan ani ni Herrera, Raqz?

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 25, 2009, 05:41:35 PM
Nakasuway jud ko aning habal habal sa negros niadto me ug lake..haskang hadloka kay na crush me but wa ra naunsa,nalata lang ang marang nga da sa ako kauban kay naipit man siya.

Lalaki imong kauban, Mist? Basig gawas sa marang diha pay lain nga naipit ug napusa!

Quote from: hofelina on August 25, 2009, 05:58:07 AM


Pinoy Porche!

Ha ha ha. Gibutangan pud unta og banggira!

naguol, nagmugtok, minghoy, napus-an, namatjag iring

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 25, 2009, 02:45:19 PM
Ang kinabuhi murag kaldero

Usahay murag inidoro

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 25, 2009, 01:47:14 PM
Siya ang mangwarta kay pilion niya ang tigulang pa sa iya.Kalooy ni Manang

Naa baja puy bata-bata pa nga kawartahan na, he he.

gihidlaw, naghigwaos, nag-aliwaros, nag-alindasay, gibangkoliya

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 25, 2009, 01:39:33 PM
Ang menyo ug manguyab, bahalag mahurot ang kwarta bast maka score lang.

Tingali kon kwartahan. Pero bisan ang mga way nahot, manginguha gihapon nga maka-score, oi! Makailad diay,...

Korek, "Mamainit ta". Lain pud ang "Magpainit ta", he he.

Quote from: Lollapalooza on August 25, 2009, 01:13:41 PM
lain man gud ng init kaayu unya pabugnaw mo... nindot gyud pabugnaw para painit

Painit ba... as in, inom kape, he he.

Quote from: Lollapalooza on August 25, 2009, 12:23:02 PM
sa mabugnawng dapit sama anang daplin sa dagat.....aircon nga lugar.... basta mabugnawng lugar gyud...

Nindot sa bugnawng lugar aron adto didto magpainit...

Quote from: fdaray on August 25, 2009, 11:13:36 AM
Bingca nga gipatubuan ug tuba,  nga pagud-pagud ug gamay ang ibabaw.

Kini ang super humot ug super lami, labi na kon bag-ong haon unja nag-aso pa sa kainit. Ang mga tunggoy-tunggoy ug liki-liki nga nangapagod lami kaajo tagamtamon kauban sa humok ug medjo ngilngig nga ilawom. Ang libat nga mokaon mosamot og sulimbad ang mata, he he.

Quote from: fdaray on August 25, 2009, 08:20:33 AM
Para sa mga Pinay, money first, the love. If love is not developed, then divorce.

He he, mora diayg photographic film. Kon ma-expose unja dili mo-develop, diskasi...

Quote from: glacier_71 on August 25, 2009, 12:51:53 AM
may man ang funerarya kay kausa ra man. ang hospital, dili. 

In this regard, ahong nadunggan about bus drivers nga ang standing instruction kuno nila kay kon naa silay maligsan unja maangol lang, balikan aron tiwasan, seguroon nga dedbol para gamay ra ang gasto sa kompaniya.

Quote from: Bambi on August 25, 2009, 04:27:35 AM

mosamot kag ka wise ani hubs! 

Salamat, Bambs! Pwede na unja kong mahimong mananambagay...

Pwede iapil ang nasaypang toothpaste: wasabi.

- ninggamit og wasabi as toothpaste

Quote from: glacier_71 on August 25, 2009, 03:42:34 AM
kung ulitawo, magpangurog ang tuhod

kung minyo, magpangurog ang itlog


nyahahaha

Ulitawo, mangurog ang tuhod kay nakujawan.
Minjo, mangurog ang itlog kay di kahuwat!

- itlog sa minjo, nangurog pero gatingsi gihapon

Quote from: glacier_71 on August 25, 2009, 12:33:51 AM
Most Helpful Category, kay daghan man kaha siya natabangan.

Pang-kindergarten man ning imong category, Bay Glace, he he.

(Oops, morag paingon na man nis komedja, da. Ruled as a homicide ra ba kuno tawon ang case mi MJ.)

Quote from: thegirlnextdoor on August 24, 2009, 07:44:07 PM
Also women here need not fall for a man who is a reject amongst his own race back in his own country.

Quote from: Keko on August 24, 2009, 08:13:44 PM
Some of these ugly old foreigner look for love but others look for a slave or a maid. this is my feeling after I spoke some of them in Philippines.

And as well some behaved so arrogant in philippines. I was really ashamed even if I am not from their country but because the people would think I am like them just cause I am not pinoy

Best regards

Sorry I can't help chiming in. Yes, sad to say, most of these old ugly foreigners are losers in their home country. And many of them are sick (not ill, but really sick, as in sicko). 

Quote from: vhinz08 on August 24, 2009, 08:01:41 PM
Ang palahubog mao sila daghan ug anak kay palahobog man.

Palahobog pante. 

Ha ha ha. Libog ahong kutaw kadijot da. Tingala lang ta nganong modaghang ang palahubog.

Palahubog man diay nga sa Tagalog pa, manananggal.

bakya mo neneng gitangag sa kanding
kanding way batasan gilamoy sa hunasan

kakha - to scratch (the ground, to look for food); said of chickens
tuka - to eat (using the beak); tuhak
kakha-tuka - purdoy; way nahot; one who lives a hand-to-mouth existence

lunod - to sink
patay - to die (or to kill?)
lunod-patay - die-hard; unflinching

pito - seven
pitopito - tadpole

Naa may rhyme ani that I remember from childhood. Ambot lang hinuon kon part ba ni sa Visayan folklore or buhat-buhat ra ni sa ahong ijaang tistisan:

Sabaw naglabaw
Unod nagkunhod.

Diha pud to sijay kitchen ditty that goes something like:

Kusinerang labing ulit
Bisag init siging punit
Bisag hilaw siging tilaw
Kusinerang labing ulit

Lain-laing planeta? Nakakita diay kag aliens nga klase-klase ang porma sa ulo?

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 24, 2009, 02:23:07 PM
Usahay pod mao kini hinungdan nga ikaw masikaran
Sa imong kadulog sa higdaanan ug dayon moingon
Wa man kay batasan,wa jud nimo ampingi nga pug-ngan
Aron di naku mahang-gab ang tanan
Pastilan pati ba hangin nga katingalahan ako gipakaslan?

A man and his wife have gone to bed. After laying in bed for a few minutes the man lets out a loud fart.

Wifey rolls over and growls, "What in God's name was that?"

Man says, "TOUCHDOWN, I'm ahead, 7 to nothing!!!"

A few minutes later the wife lets out a louder boom.

Husband says, "Omigosh, what was that?"

She replies "Touchdown, score tied."

The man lays there for about 10 minutes trying to work up a real big one. He tries so hard he craps in bed.

The wife asks, "Now what in the world was that?"

He replies, "Halftime. Switch sides."

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 24, 2009, 02:37:17 PM


Observant kaayo ni Toy..

Ah, nakapasiklap diay ka sa gipagawas, he he.

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 24, 2009, 03:18:30 PM


Patay,mas dakuunta imong matabang Toy ug gi pusil pa nimo kay ikaw man mo bayad tanan sa hospital.

OK lang kon ang bayran hospital. Ang problema kon ang bayran punerarya. 

Quote from: BedoAdoSalada on August 24, 2009, 10:35:59 AM
Naa koy golf buddy dili ga inom dili ga sigarilyo pero naka colon cancer. 

Tagay pa pre !        

Who was it who said, "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."

Ha ha ha. Cheers!

kabahong - festering wound
kaskaro - some kind of itchy skin infection

Quote from: Bambi on August 24, 2009, 04:27:23 AM
piskay - nice
buna-buna - forehead

piskay - elsewhere, this translates as healthy and vigorous; askil
buna-buna - pubic mound (mons pubis or mons veneris)

Ang forehead maoy buna. Ang buna-buna, forehead kunohay. Mao bitaw nga sa ubos ta mo-amen kon ang baje prominent og buna-buna, ha ha ha.

Sa ahong tan-aw, this expression ("ija2x aho2x") has gained credence in the minds of many (as a humorous depiction of us Bol-anons) as much for its"sound" as it is for its "sense". Most non-Bol-anon Binisaya speakers are struck more by the quaint pronunciation ("ija" for "iya", and "aho" for "ako") than by the import of the phrase.

Sample sentence:

Piskay gihapon ang ijang lubot bisag napuno sa kagid ug kabahong!

Quote from: Bambi on August 24, 2009, 04:11:22 AM
hubs, might encountered lately that  exact Horse power/persistence  but not the Horse size!  Hiyaaaaa !  lol

Sorry Sir Koddi!.....na  OT.... una mi.

Sorry tuod sa OT. Bahin man gud nig OT**, ha ha.

Quote from: Bambi on August 24, 2009, 03:32:28 AM
  mangingiyotay

He he, napun-an og one more word ang ahong Binisaya vocabulary...

Para way away, kini maoy ideal nga qualities sa bana ug asawa--expressed as love poems, he he.


WOMAN'S LOVE POEM

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.



MAN'S LOVE POEM

I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with
huge boobs who owns a bar on a golf course
and loves to send me fishing and hunting.
This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a s***.

Quote from: Koddi Prudente on August 23, 2009, 11:57:18 PM
Ang tungog dili lang makahatag og bulok sa tuba, makahatag usab kini og ka-aplod nga maoy kinaiya sa tuba, mora'g pait-pait labi na kon bahal.   

Tuod no? Kahinumdom ko sa gamay pa ko nga gipatilaw kong tuba (dili pa tingali diay to matawag og tuba) nga gikan pa sa lubi. Tam-is man.

He he, managana man hinuon tang mosumpay ani...

Mist, hala bira!

Quote from: Koddi Prudente on August 23, 2009, 11:24:48 PM
Kusog na mi mangaon niana sa 1960s pa. Mao tingali ni ang matang sa pagkaon nga susama ta sa mga Tagalog kon ugaling sila ang nagsugod niini. Pero di ko sure kon sila ba. Tingali pud og kita kay Visayas-Mindanao baya ang daghan og kakaw.

Makakaon ko ani nga combination sa balay ra man gud. Until nakatilaw ko ani in a restaurant in Manila. Naa bay restaurants diha sa ato karon nga nag-serve ani as part of their menu?

Quote from: hofelina on August 23, 2009, 09:39:30 PM
15.)  Beat this logic:
       Doctors say good sex cures prostate problems.
       But most "celibate" priests have no prostate problems.
       Therefore, most priests practice sex!!!

He he, no comment. Ato lang ning i-joke:

Priest (to seminarian): Doy, pagtarong diha. Ikay pinakabrayt sa injong batch. Ajaw anang ujab-ujab.
Seminarian: Lami man gud maggukod-gukod og chicks, dre.
Priest: Kay lami man bitaw ang chicks. Pero ajaw kabalaka, pagpari una. Kon pari ka na, ikaw nay gukdon sa chicks!

Ang gitawag og agglutination atong mamatikdan sa daghang pinulongan, pero mas extensive and gamit ani sa, among others, Latin, Japanese and Korean and yes, Greek and Malayo-Polynesian languages.

Kining tinughong basically morag recycling sa kan-on. Ang bahaw nga kan-ong humay pwede himoong fried rice, pwede pud himoong tinughong. Pero ang lami nga tinughong kadtong mais nga naay nipis nga dukot.

Pwede ang tinughong nga walay sagol, lami na higopon ang sabaw. Tinughong na ni. Hinuon, mahimong butangan og asin, o asukar, o gatas, o tabliya, o hipon. Or, for that matter, pwedeng sagolan og cheese, or caviar, or truffles, he he.

Quote from: Raquelproud boholana on August 23, 2009, 11:31:31 AM
Di ba maglain ang ginhawaan magsagol ang tam is ug parat  ug mokaon ko ug champorado pero tinughong tawag nako ani kay mao ra may akong kan on wa ko kabalo pwede diay ni paresan ug buwad.

Kining tsamporado nga paresan og buwad, di ba Tinagalog ni? Wala man tingali ni originally sa atoa.

Quote from: Bayay on August 23, 2009, 07:05:28 PM
morag trademark na na para sa mga bol-anon ky ang taga bicol bitaw ilado man pod nga paki hang (halang) pero dili ra man pod kay taga bicol ra ang ganahan ug sili..diha nailado ang mga bol-anon pareha ra pod anang "ija2x aho2x" nga ekspresyon

Mas nailhan lang tingali ang atong "ija2x aho2x" kaysa atong pagkapakibahog.

He he, suhito jud ni si Ms. Misty, da!

Tambag alang sa mga baje: Klaroha unsay injong gusto.

Sample story:

Ang asawa dugay nang wa tagda sa bana. Inighuman og panihapon, hagok dajon si mister. Usa ka gabii, nakahunahuna si misis og paagi. Wala sija mag-panty.

Hapit na mohagok si mister dihang gikuhit sija ni misis. Ingon sija, in a sweet voice, "Dear, wala na koy panty."

Tubag ni mister: "Mao ba? Sigi, ugma palitan ta ka og usa ka dosena."



Moral lesson: Klaroha unsay imong gusto. Labniha na lang dajon.

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 23, 2009, 05:37:42 PM
Akong bag ong nakat0on ug mahigugma ka is: ayaw kalimot ug smile.

Mora diay kag nagparetrato.

- in love
- in love kuno
- in love kaajo
- naamaw sa love
- amaw nga na in love

Quote from: Gener on August 06, 2009, 04:13:40 PM
The man was also sentenced to 10 years in jail and three lashes of the whip for forcing his wife to have anal sex, Law said. Anal sex, even when consensual, is a crime punishable by up to 20 years imprisonment in Malaysia. The sentences are to run concurrently.

Mameligro ni sija sa prisohan. Basig adto ni sija mabasli. Paet. 

Quote from: mistyeyed on August 23, 2009, 04:21:56 PM
Hahaha. After 3 days mabuhi si Misty, ang nose lang pala ang nasunog.

Si Misty, ang batang kublan. (Ilong ray patjanan.)