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Messages - Barbaro

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#1501
Weird and Extreme / Great balls of fire! Russian woman sets fire to ex-husband's penis
October 29, 2007, 01:16:12 PM
News
Oct 5, 2007
Great balls of fire! Russian woman sets fire to ex-husband's penis
by Gulliver

A Moscow woman burnt her ex-husband's penis in a fit of anger as he was watching TV naked and sipping vodka.

The man was taken to hospital with burns all over his body, but his jealous ex-wife did not feel guilty at all, according to the Tvoi Den newspaper.

"It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told the newspaper. "I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."

The woman named only as Irina, 41, was married to the man Dmitry, 48, for 19 years. The couple divorced three years ago but shared the same apartment afterwards.

Irina took her revenge on Dmity when he sitting watching an adult program on a night TV channel. First his ex-wife grabbed a bottle of vodka, spilled some on him and tried to set him on fire with a match. But the flame died out and her attempt failed.

Then Irina made a wick of a newspaper and threw the burning paper aiming at the man's crotch. Dmitry told doctors that he had felt terrible pain but could not extinguish the fire. He started burning like a torch.

Doctors said that Dmitry could have burned alive if the woman had not called an ambulance. Severe burns were found on the man's arms, legs, chest and penis.

The lesson for Russian men is don't annoy fiery ex-wives, if you want to keep your manhood intact.
#1502
Weird and Extreme / Hearse thieves bring corpse on a pub crawl
October 29, 2007, 01:10:37 PM
Oct 8, 2007
Hearse thieves bring corpse on a pub crawl
by Gulliver 



Two South African men were arrested in Soweto after allegedly going on a drinking spree in a stolen hearse with a body in the back.

They were nabbed after the hearse ran out of petrol at 3 o'clock on a Sunday morning and they asked three women they had met in a drinkintg den to help push the hearse, police said.

The men allegedly went into a shebeen while intoxicated and asked the three women to help push the car to the nearest petrol station.

The men told the women they were on their way to bury the body of a relative. But the women called a member of the Community Policing Forum in the township of Soewto.

The hearse driver, Siphiwo Mkhize, said he had parked outside his house to fetch money for petrol. When he came out the vehicle was gone.

"It is a shocking thing to realise there are people who could steal a hearse with a dead person inside," he told The Sowetan newspaper.

"Going shebeen-hopping with a corpse takes the cake. What kind of people are these?"

A member of the Community Policing Forum said the men appeared to be drunk when they were arrested.
#1503
Facts and Trivia / Re: DID YOU KNOW
October 29, 2007, 12:57:45 PM
Sure bambs.ingat gyod uso raba sa ato.


In most advertisements, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10.
#1504
Bible Study / Re: Christian Words..
October 29, 2007, 12:42:23 PM
I fear that many people seek to hear God solely as a device for securing their own safety, comfort and righteousness. For those who busy themselves to know the will of God, however, it is still true that "those who want to save their life will lose it." My extreme preoccupation with knowing God's will for me may only indicate, contrary to what is often thought, that I am overconcerned with myself, not a Christlike interest in the well-being of others or in the glory of God.
         Dallas Willard
#1505
Inspiration & Hope / Choose to imagine
October 29, 2007, 12:35:53 PM

The world you imagine is the world you experience. The life you imagine is the life you live.
To bring anything into your life, imagine it is already there. The more completely you imagine it, the more fully it becomes real for you.

All that you are, you once imagined yourself to be. What do you choose to imagine now?

Imagination does its work not by tapping into some supernatural, secret power. Imagination creates your world by simply and naturally directing the enormous creative energy that is your life.

Imagination enables you to fully and authentically experience what is already there. Through the power of your imagination, you choose your own specific reality from a limitless set of possibilities.

Be aware and in touch with what you choose to imagine. For with your imagination, you are choosing the direction of your life.

Ralph Marston

#1506
Inspiration & Hope / Find your own path
October 29, 2007, 12:34:41 PM

The obstacles you encounter are not preventing you from reaching your dreams. They're merely blocking one particular path that you mistakenly assume is the only way to reach those dreams.
If you focus on the obstacles, then you give them more power. Instead, focus on your purpose, on your most authentic and fundamental intentions.

The world can trick you into thinking that there's only one road to your destination. In truth, there are infinite ways to get where you wish to go.

There's nothing that says you have to succeed in the same way as someone else. In fact, there's nothing that says you must define success in the same way as someone else.

You are truly one of a kind, with your own unique passions and purposes. And you're fully capable of traveling your own route to the fulfillment of your dreams.

Don't be stopped just because the road that everyone else uses has been closed. Find your own path, and if that path is blocked find another, and you will surely reach whatever destination you choose.

Ralph Marston
#1507
Inspiration & Hope / Feel good about life
October 29, 2007, 12:29:04 PM
 
When you can change things for the better, do it. When you're unable to make any changes in the way things are, you still can change the way you feel.
And your feelings will end up changing your world. Because your feelings have an effect on what you do from moment to moment.

The person you feel like being is the person you will become. The life you most feel like living is the life you will find yourself experiencing.

Feel good about your life, and almost immediately your life will begin to align with that feeling. In each area, on every level, you'll start creating the results that validate and fulfill the feelings.

It may at first seem ridiculous or impossible to feel good when things are not going well. Actually, though, feeling good is really quite pleasant and something you can easily do whenever you choose.

So decide to feel good about life, right here, right now, and as often as possible. Put your feelings to positive use, and they'll help you build a more positive life.

Ralph Marston
#1508
Inspiration & Hope / Firm and flexible
October 29, 2007, 12:27:38 PM

Anything that is too rigid can be quickly fractured by sufficient force. By contrast, anything that is flexible can experience blow after blow from every direction and still keep springing back into place.
When you're willing and able to bend, you're much less likely to break. By adapting to changing situations, you can successfully make your way through even the most difficult challenges.

Being flexible does not mean giving in or giving up or being any less firm or being any less committed to the outcome you seek. Being flexible means being more understanding, more creative, more open to new and better ways of achieving the results you wish to achieve.

A tree that bends with the wind does not get carried off by the wind, but in fact stands firmly in its location. Flexibility enables you to remain strong, to remain true to your position, and to successfully handle whatever challenges come along.

If you're overly rigid, you may appear strong on the surface, yet any kind of strength that is not willing or able to adapt is extremely vulnerable. Seek to develop real and lasting strength, the kind that is flexible enough to respond to a wide variety of challenges.

Be steadfast about your most treasured values, and flexible about how you express and fulfill them. With a firm will and a flexible approach, truly great things are possible.

Ralph Marston
#1509
Weird and Extreme / Re: Hotties at Men's Urinals
October 29, 2007, 12:24:29 PM
AMAZING ROTO-ROOTER DELUXE TOILET



The toilet has evolved so little since the Romans invented the latrine in 2500 B.C. The next significant advance happened when Albert Giblin, an employee of Thomas Crapper, perfected an effective flush toilet in 1898.

But now modern technology has delivered us the Roto-Rooter Deluxe Toilet!

Is this not the most amazing toilet you have ever seen? Considering that the average person spends 11,862 hours in the bathroom in a lifetime, which adds up to one year, four months and five days, don't you deserve a quality toilet experience?

This toilet of your dreams comes fully loaded with the following luxury enhancements:

Philipsâ,,¢ 20-inch LCD TV and Star Wars DVD
Xboxâ,,¢ 360 gaming system
Philipsâ,,¢ DVD player
Gateway® EMachineâ,,¢ laptop computer with fully articulated robot arm
iPodâ,,¢ with stereo docking station equipped with toilet paper dispenser
Roto-Rooter “emergency” button
Tivoâ,,¢ recorder
Avantiâ,,¢ refrigerator with beer tap, stocked with drinks and snacks
Magazine rack and subscriptions to Sports Illustrated, ESPN and GQ
Bike pedal exerciser
Cup warmer / cooler

Enjoy! Enjoy!


#1510
Obituary / Re: Condolences to Mike's Father
October 28, 2007, 02:03:10 PM
mike condolence.  our prayers are with you and your family.
#1511
Facts and Trivia / Re: DID YOU KNOW
October 28, 2007, 12:16:16 PM
Did you know that tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur!
#1512
Facts and Trivia / Woman gives birth to 17 pound baby
October 27, 2007, 11:18:06 PM


Baby Nadia - a whopping big bundle of joy at 17 pounds

Oct 10, 2007
Woman gives birth to 17 pound baby
by Gulliver 
Baby Nadia - a whopping big bundle of joy at 17 pounds.


A Russian woman gave birth to a whopping baby girl who weighed in at an amazing 17.1lb or 7.7kg - around two and a half times the weight of an average newborn.

Baby Nadia was delivered by Caesarean section in the local maternity hospital in Russia's Altai region.

43-year-old Tatyana Barabanova's twelfth child, she joins eight sisters and three brothers, all of whom weighed in at more than 11lbs.

Her surprised mother said: "We were all simply in shock. What did the father say? He couldn't say a thing - he just stood there blinking."

She is not sure what was behind Nadia's extraordinary size, but revealed that she ate everything during the pregnancy. Not having the money for special foods, Nadia's mother ate potatoes, noodles and tomatoes.

Baby Nadia is bigger than Mexican baby Antonio Vasconcelos who weighed into the world at at 14.5lbs in February. Known as "Super Tonio" and born by Caesarean section as well, he measured an enormous 22 inches in length.

In Brazil another Antonio was born in Salvador in January 2005, weighing a whopping 16lbs 11ozs, when proud 23-year-old mother Teresa Alejandra Cruz gave birth.

The heaviest baby born to a healthy mother was a boy weighing 22lbs 8ozs, in Aversa, Italy, in September 1955 - according to the Guinness World Records.
#1513
Bohol Tourism | Bohol Travel & Tour / Re: Bohol :: more than the usual (photos)
October 23, 2007, 07:21:05 PM
murag kaulion na gyod ko.. tnx for posting..
#1514
Jokes and Humor / Re: Gagssss
October 23, 2007, 05:59:55 PM
Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat sitting at the end of the bar with a great big smile on his face. Mike says, "Pat, what are you so happy for?"

"Well Mike, I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxin' my boat, and a redhead came up to me.. **** out to here, Mike.
****
out to here! She says, 'Can I have a ride in your boat?'

I said 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out, Mike. I turned off the key and I said 'It's either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim, Mike. She couldn't swim!"



The next day Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat sitting at the end of the bar with a even bigger smile on his face. Mike says, "What are you happy

about today Pat?"

"Well Mike.... I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxin' my boat and a BEAUTIFUL blond came up to me...**** out to here, Mike.
**** out to here! She said 'Can I have a ride in your boat?'

I told her 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out,

Mike. Way out much further than the last one. I turned off the key and I

said, 'It's either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim, Mike! She couldn't

swim!"



A couple days pass and Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat down there cryin'
over a beer. Mike says, "Pat, what are you so sad for?"

"Well Mike, I gotta tell ya.... Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just

waxin' my boat, and the most desirable brunette came up to me... **** WAY out to here, Mike. **** WAY out to here. She says, 'Can I have a ride in

your boat?'

So I said, 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out,

Mike, way WAY out... much further than the last two.

I turned off the key, and looked at her **** and said 'It's either screw or swim!'



She pulled down her pants and.....She had a pecker, Mike! She had this great
BIG pecker! ... and I can't swim Mike! I can't swim!"
#1515
Jokes and Humor / Re: It's Joke Time Again!!!
October 23, 2007, 05:53:01 PM
Reporter: Ano ka ba Manny? Milyonaryo? Sabungero? Sugarol? Politico?
Babaero? Lahat na lang pinasok mo...,
Manny: Kya nga PAKYAW pangalan ko eh.
#1516
Jokes and Humor / Re: Men & Women
October 23, 2007, 05:50:58 PM
Men:

1. All men are extremely busy.
2. Although they are so busy, they still have time for women.
3. Although they have time for women, they don't really care for them.
4. Although they don't really care for them, they always have one Around.
5. Although they always have one around them, they always try their Luck with others.
6. Although they try their luck with others, they get really pissed off If the women leaves them.
7. Although the women leaves them they still don't learn from their
Mistakes and still try their luck with others.

Women:

1. the most important thing for a woman is financial security.
2. Although this is so important, they still go out and buy expensive Clothes.
3. Although they always buy expensive clothes, they never have something To wear.
4. Although they never have something to wear, they always dress Beautifully.
5. Although they always dress beautifully, their clothes are always just "An old rag".
6. Although their clothes are always "just an old rag", they still Expect you to compliment them.
7. Although they expect you to compliment them, when you do, they don't Believe you.
#1517
Love Talk / Re: You Cannot Forget A Woman's Name
October 22, 2007, 09:54:55 AM
You can forget a lot of things, but you cannot forget a woman’s name and claim to love her.
#1518
Introduce Yourself / Re: Welcome Coldfire!
October 21, 2007, 03:18:04 AM
welcome tubag bohol coldfire...

nice user name , murag bugnaw pa sa hotcake .
#1519
Love Talk / Re: We Are Family...
October 21, 2007, 02:58:33 AM
yeahhhh.. asa raman oi.. para magka ilhanay nata...
#1520
Question and Answer / Re: What is your favorite cologne and/or perfume brand?
October 21, 2007, 02:56:24 AM
i remember during my high school time i use snoking & charlegne daily.. naka uyab pod tawn kahit sa sari sari store nako gipalit. LOL
#1521
Inspiration & Hope / Re: Prayers Help BUT Money is the Answer! (referring to Mike's situation)
October 20, 2007, 08:21:22 PM
Salamat sa mga malumo nga kasing kasing sa tubag bohol family..
pareha gyod ta ani mike akong brother sad na confine
sa manila first time pa nya sakay unta  sa barko first week sa November
Na DENGUE. pero medyo ok na sya ngayon yung platelet nalang medyo mababa..
#1522
Jokes and Humor / Re: Mangatawa Usa Ta.
October 20, 2007, 08:09:52 PM
Imbitasyon sa kasal
Naa koy amiga nga si GEMA ELOC, kaslonon kang EDGAR CABAHUG.
Wala sila modayon pagpakasal kay wala kauyon sa invitation card: “CABAHUG-ELOC nuptial”
#1523
Jokes and Humor / Re: TEXT JOKS
October 20, 2007, 07:34:07 PM
Nagpa-blood test si Tulume.
Kumuha ng sample ang nars. Pagkatapos, walang
makitang bulak ang nars sinipsip ng nars ang daliri
ni Tulume. Naligayahan si Tulume kaya sinabihan
niya ang nars, "Magpapa-urine test din ako!"
#1524
Jokes and Humor / Re: Joke Time Again!!!
October 20, 2007, 07:30:54 PM
Asawa: Hon, bisan taas na imong edad, nakapaanak pa ka.
Bana: Super engine gud ni!!!
Asawa: Ipa check-up na.
Bana: Ngano man?
Asawa: Itom kaayong bata. Smoke belching ka!
#1525
Jokes and Humor / Re: It's Joke Time Again!!!
October 20, 2007, 07:28:22 PM
Husband (hubog pagka-gabii): Darling, atong CR ba mora'g gi-abat.
Wife: Ngano man?
Husband: Kay kada abli nako sa door, musiga ang suga.
Wife: ANIMAL ka! Ikaw diay nangihi sa pridyeder!!
#1526
Jokes and Humor / Re: Funny Pictures
October 20, 2007, 07:27:29 PM
ayaw na reklamo cel kay dugay na na sila gisubaybayan.. ;D ;D ;D
#1527
Jokes and Humor / Re: Funny Pictures
October 20, 2007, 07:07:51 PM
KISSING COPS BANNED BY RUSSIA




Russia's culture minister claimed Kissing Policeman (An Epoch of Clemency) was politically provocative and banned it and 16 other works from a display of contemporary Russian art in Paris

A photograph showing two policemen kissing passionately in a Siberian forest has been banned by the Russian government.

The image shows the two uniformed policemen kissing on the lips and holding each other by the buttocks in a show covered forest of birch trees.

The picture entitled Kissing Policemen (An Epoch of Clemency was due to go on display at an exhibition in Paris, but was banned by the Russian authorities.

Russian culture minister Alexander Sorolov described the controversial picture as political provocation.

He said he was pulling it and 16 other works from a display of contemporary Russian art at Paris's Maison Rouge exhibition hall this week.

Mr Sokolov said: "It this exhibition appears, it will bring shame on Russia. In this case, all of us will bear full responsibility.

"It is inadmissible... to take all this pornography, kissing policeman and erotic pictures to Paris."

Another work by the same artists, the Blue Noses collective, which showed Vladimir Putin, George Bush and Osama bin Laden cavorting on a double bed in their underpants, was also banned.
Customs officers confiscated the montage from a British art dealer last year when he tried to take it to London.

The creators of the Kissing Policemen claim it is a homage to the celebrated British graffiti artist Banksy.

"We were inspired by Banksy's iconic image of two constables kissing. We wanted to do the same but in Russia," said Alexander Shaburov, who created it with Viacheslav Mizin.

The picture had nothing to do with homosexuality, but was an absurdist fantasy about what could happen if everyone showed mercy and tenderness to each other, he explained.

However, the image received no mercy from the authorities in Russia, prompting Shaburov to claim: "The state is beginning to administer culture in the same way it did under Khrushchev."

The photo was taken in the Siberian city of Novosibirsk and shown at the Tretyakov gallery in February and March this year. It is now in a small gallery in Moscow.

There was no scandal when it was shown in Russia, Shaburov added.

Russian leader Vladimir Putin is not known for his sense of humor. He banned Russia's version of the satirical British TV puppet show Spitting Image in one of his first acts as president.

- Oct 16, 2007
source.. life is a joke

#1528
Bible Study / Re: Christian Words..
October 20, 2007, 06:51:33 PM
Beside Jesus, the whole lot of us are so contemptible... But God is like Jesus, and like Jesus, He will not give up until we, too, are like Jesus.
         ... Frank C. Laubach
#1529
Inspiration & Hope / Feel whatever you choose
October 20, 2007, 06:49:03 PM

Stop working so diligently to make your feelings match your circumstances. Realize instead that you can select and direct your feelings to create much more favorable circumstances of your own choosing.
There's no law that says you must harbor feelings of disappointment, dismay, anger and futility when events don't go your way. You can just as easily feel amused, enlightened and more positively inspired than ever before.

You could use your feelings to prolong a difficult situation. Or you can choose other feelings that will enable you to transcend your greatest difficulties and move forward.

How do you feel positive when the world around you is so negative? Just ask yourself whether you would rather be imprisoned by your feelings or empowered by them.

From moment to moment, you are constantly choosing which feelings to hold on to and which ones to discard. Be ever mindful of this power that is yours, for by improving the way you feel you can improve anything in your life to whatever degree you decide.

Your feelings are powerful forces, and by taking control of them you can move your life in any direction. Feel whatever you choose, and you are choosing to make it so.

Ralph Marston

#1530
Inspiration & Hope / One more attempt
October 20, 2007, 06:48:12 PM
If you are always willing to make one more attempt, you can reach whatever goal you choose. No matter what results you get, the only real failure is when you stop making the effort.
When you are mistaken, you can learn. When you are knocked down, you can get back up.

When you find that you've veered off track, you can correct your direction. When you discover that circumstances have changed, you can make adjustments accordingly.

Eventually, you'll reach the point at which the next attempt you make is the one that will complete the desired accomplishment. What a shame it would be to stop just one effort short of success.

For that next effort will make all the others pay off. Commit yourself to making one more effort, one more attempt, as often as necessary, and anything is within your reach.

Keep making that one more attempt, keep getting back up, and keep moving forward in the direction of your goal, one step after another. And you will surely get there.

Ralph Marston

#1531
Inspiration & Hope / Something to appreciate
October 20, 2007, 06:47:13 PM

What's the quickest way out of a negative attitude? Have something ready and waiting that you can immediately and genuinely appreciate.
How do you find the hidden value in any situation? Look for something to truly appreciate.

When you seek to find things to appreciate, what you'll discover are hidden treasures upon which you can build great value. Look for what you can appreciate, and you'll find positive, powerful tools that will pull you forward.

Get in the habit of starting each day by thinking of something for which you can be thankful. Then, whenever you catch yourself falling into a negative thought pattern, you'll already have something positive toward which you can redirect your thoughts.

Each time you meet a new person, make it a point to find something, at the very outset of the relationship, that you can sincerely appreciate. Every time you find yourself in a new place or situation, look first for what you can appreciate about it.

Find something to appreciate, and your effectiveness will increase dramatically. Find something to appreciate, and you'll uncover real treasure.

Ralph Marston

#1532
Inspiration & Hope / It's your life
October 20, 2007, 06:46:18 PM
 
There's no sense in fighting over the scraps that others might or might not throw under the table. Instead, get busy and create your own magnificent feast.
Stop going from door to door begging for someone else to solve all your problems for you. Instead, pick a formidable challenge, work your way through it, and you'll build plenty of strength and experience to handle whatever situations come your way.

What possible use is there in developing elaborate arguments that place the blame for your difficulties on someone else? Put your energy into creating a brilliant future, not into fighting over what has already been left behind.

This is your life. The only person who can successfully live it is you.

Do you really think you can ever find fulfillment by signing over your control and responsibility to someone else? You're here to live and to do, not to merely observe and complain.

Nothing that could ever be done for you or handed to you can come close to the experience of making a positive difference in your own unique way. This is your life, so jump right in and live the exquisite richness as you make your own way through.

Ralph Marston

#1533
Facts and Trivia / Re: DID YOU KNOW
October 20, 2007, 06:43:05 PM
sorry.. wahaha clerical error lang cemetery..

tnx cel..
#1534
Facts and Trivia / Re: DID YOU KNOW
October 20, 2007, 06:32:40 PM
The word cemetery comes from the greek koinmetrion which means dormitory..
#1535
Facts and Trivia / Re: DID YOU KNOW
October 20, 2007, 06:12:39 PM
magbiro lang sa lasing .. wag sa bagong gising...
#1536
Facts and Trivia / Spike Milligan's last laugh - I told you I was ill
October 20, 2007, 06:11:27 PM

Even in death Irish comic genius Spike Milligan managed to have the last laugh.

Two years after his death at his home in Sussex, England, the creator of "The Goon Show" has finally got the epitaph he wanted.

A headstone bearing the words "I told you I was ill" has been erected above his grave at St. Thomas's Church in Winchelsea, East Sussex.

Sadly for more than two years after his death at the age of 83, the funny man's grave had no gravestone, and was marked only with flowers and a small statue.

Problems arose after his family had been unable to agree on a headstone.

Now his epitaph has finally been added to a Celtic cross above his grave. The monument carries the inscription in Gaelic - Milligan was an Irish citizen, though he was born in India and lived most of his life in England.

The Irish text his family finally settled on - "Duirt me leat go raibh me breoite" or "I told you I was ill" - got the approval of the Chichester Diocese.

Bill Horsman, chairman of the Goon Show Preservation Society, welcomed the news of the headstone going up as "marvellous". He admitted they had been very concerned for some time about the situation.

He said it was sad to see that the grave was in such a state, but there were very sensitive family problems involved and they simply could not get involved.

Dubbed the "godfather of alternative comedy" by Eddie Izzard, the gifted comedian suffered bipolar disorder - or manic depression - all his life. He once tried to kill Peter Sellers, but they remained friends despite this.

Regarded as the father of British comedy, he devised and wrote the famous "Goon Show" for BBC radio in which he starred with Peter Sellers and Harry Secombe in the 1950s. Its anarchic and often surreal humor inspired later television shows like "Monty Python's Flying Circus."

One of Spike's most noted fans was The Prince of Wales. Even he wasn't spared his irreverent wit and Milligan caused a stir when he called him a "little grovelling bastard" on television in 1994.

Spike later sent a fax to the prince, saying "I suppose a knighthood is out of the question now?" Spike was finally awarded his knighthood in 2000 - it was an honorary one because of his Irish citizenship.

Among the books he wrote were: "Puckoon," "Silly Verse for Kids," "Adolf Hitler: My Part in his Downfall" and "Depression and How to Survive It" (with Professor Anthony Clare).

Milligan Quotations:

"When I look back, the fondest memory I have is not really of the Goons. It is of a girl called Julia with enormous breasts."

"I can't see the sense in it [his honorary CBE] really. It makes me a Commander of the British Empire. They might as well make me a Commander of Milton Keynes - at least that exists."

"I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge."

"Money couldn't buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy."

"My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic."

"It's the nature of who you are. You will see sunsets in a special way, you will see life in a special way. The Milligans are like Arab racehorses. We'll kick the stable to pieces, but we'll always win the race [on his bouts of depression]"

- May 25, 2004
source weird news
#1537
Jokes and Humor / The Man Rules
October 20, 2007, 06:06:51 PM

The Man Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­ At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down    Finally , the guys' side of the story. ( I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear " the rules " From the female side.   Now here are the rules from the male side.     These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE! 
1.   Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials. .
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
#1538
Jokes and Humor / Re: Joke Time Again!!!
October 18, 2007, 05:11:27 PM
January 22 -Si Pacman nakadaug

...after 13 days...
February 4 - Nagka-stampede sa Ultra

...after 13 days...
February 17 - Landslide sa Southern Leyte

...after 13 days...
March 2 - Bakla si Rustom!!!


wahahahah
#1539
Jokes and Humor / Re: It's Joke Time Again!!!
October 18, 2007, 05:09:45 PM
customer: ayo ayo papaliton ug bahalina ug pepsi
tendero: dia ra dong
tendero: oi naa may hubog nag paingon diri sa tendahan mopalit siguro ni ay.
customer na hubog: ayo ayo papaliton ug bahala na ug piste....hehehehhe murag masyaw na rumble
#1540
Jokes and Humor / Re: Mangatawa Usa Ta.
October 18, 2007, 05:07:38 PM
lolo: juan kanang yuta sa likod sa atong balay na 5 ka iktarya ba ayaw na ninyo ibaligya ha ug mamatay nako

juan: lo dili mana atoa ang yuta sa likod sa atong balay

lolo: mao gani na ayaw ninyo ug ibaligya kai dili na atoa..hahahahah
#1541
Introduce Yourself / Re: Tubag Bohol welcomes adtin2000
October 18, 2007, 02:52:58 PM
ADTIN2000 Welcome TB..

nalate pod ko dah.. si bai magdaro nata asinda ni MIKE..
sana mag mini EB ta pohon dool raman diay
ta daghan tag mga member naa sa Dubai..

sus pwerting lawaya intawn.. nagtabisay gyod..
#1542
Tagbilaran City - Bohol / Re: TB EB in Tagbilaran: Who wants to help?
October 18, 2007, 12:46:56 PM
ayay... sayang dah.. wala pod ko anang panahuna medyear 2008..
#1543
Philippine Business News / Re: EB with TB MEMBERS IN BOHOL
October 18, 2007, 12:28:53 PM
Quote from: Melrose on October 17, 2007, 04:37:43 PM
bisan kinsay mouli, among tagboun! kita kits!

@melrose

puslan man nga tagbuon mi nimo RED CARPET and Press..(media)
#1544
Jokes and Humor / Re: It's Joke Time Again!!!
October 17, 2007, 01:29:53 PM
Duha ka bu**** sa Mental Hosp:

bu**** 1: Unsaon nato pag ikyas diri?

bu**** 2: Sayon! Magpasiga ko flashlight latay dayon sa siga!

bu**** 1: Gibuangan ka nako! Palungon pa lang nimo, hagbong ko!
#1545
Jokes and Humor / Re: TEXT JOKS
October 17, 2007, 01:27:59 PM
Traffic cop examining license of Tikya:

CITOM: Mao ni tunay nga retrato, claro ang mga kunot. Di pareho anang ubang babaye ga paritoke.
Tikya: Bugalbogalon. Ako man nang thumbmark.
#1546
Jokes and Humor / Re: TEXT JOKS
October 16, 2007, 04:26:19 PM
Bana: Kuyaw kaayo ang akoa damgo love! Gibitay ko sa pangpang! Kupot ra ko sa sagbot!
Asawa: bu**** ka! Mao diayng pwerteng sakita sa ako bulbol kay imo gibirabira!
#1547
Jokes and Humor / Re: Joke Time Again!!!
October 16, 2007, 03:16:59 PM
Bata: pabili po ng ubas!
Tindero: wala kami ubas.
Next day…
Bata: pabili po ng ubas!
Tindero: wala kami ubas.
Next day…
Boy: mama pabili po ubas!
Tindero: wala nga kaming ubas! Isa pang beses magtanong ka iistepler ko
yang
bibig mo!
Next day ulet…
Boy: may stapler po ba kayo?
Tindero: wala. Baket?
Boy: pabili nga po ng ubas! hehehe
#1548
Jokes and Humor / Re: Viva bisaya! enjoy it!
October 16, 2007, 02:58:14 PM
http://youtube.com/watch?v=drA8-gArllE
#1549
Jokes and Humor / Re: It's Joke Time Again!!!
October 16, 2007, 02:55:05 PM
By a Restroom:
TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW

In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT

In a London department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT - UPSTAIRS

In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN

(must be in an English office)
AFTER TEA BREAK, STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD

Outside a secondhand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?

Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS

Spotted in a safari park:
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR

Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR

Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.

Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET
LESSONS

On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE
BELL DOESN'T WORK)
#1550
Inspiration & Hope / Re: The best you can imagine
October 16, 2007, 01:10:26 PM
yeahh ,bambs TNX ..WOW...
#1551
Facts and Trivia / Millionaire shoplifter on most wanted list
October 16, 2007, 12:48:44 PM
 


 
He dresses in expensive designer clothes by Armani and Luis Vuitton and stays at the poshest hotels.

But Kevin Castle who hides behind the face of a respectable businessman is a 'millionaire shoplifter' who makes £1,000 (over $2000) a day from his crimes.

British police, who are hunting the well-dressed crook with a taste for the good life, have declared him 'most wanted'.

Castle is being sought by three police forces - Lancashire, Greater Manchester and Nottinghamshire - for shoplifting, identity theft, interception of mail and money laundering.

Police say Britain's top shoplifter (pictured above) always wears expensive designer clothes such as Armani, Luis Vuitton and Versace.

The 42-year-old is known to frequent high-class establishments in London such as the Ritz, Claridges and the Dorchester Hotel.

Castle often uses hire cars and tends to favor large vehicles such as the Porsche Cayenne, VW Touareg SUV and Jaguars.

He is believed to be currently living in London in rented accommodation (possibly costing at least £1,000 (over $2000) per week, say police.

Detective Constable Anita Fishwick, of Lancashire police, said: "This man likes to think he is a criminal mastermind.

"There is no doubt he is Britain's biggest shoplifter. He lives and looks like a millionaire.

"He is a suave, charismatic businessman who has made shoplifting his trade.

"Mr Castle is quite distinctive because of his clothing and his millionaire-type lifestyle.

"We are very keen to trace this man and speak to him in connection with our inquiries."

Castle often targets DIY stores and returns the stolen items with forged till receipts.
He is featured on Lancashire Constabulary's Most Wanted website: http://www.lancashire.police.uk.
Oct 15, 2007
#1552
Bible Study / Re: Christian Words..
October 16, 2007, 12:25:08 PM
God has been very good to me, for I never dwell upon anything wrong which a person has done, so as to remember it afterwards. If I do remember it, I always see some other virtue in that person.

Teresa of Avila
#1553
Inspiration & Hope / The best you can imagine
October 16, 2007, 12:19:28 PM

Imagine for a moment that your every desire has been fulfilled, and that even the dreams you dare not to dream have become a reality. Imagine a life with no worries, no fears, no limitations, with nothing to fight against, nothing standing in your way, nothing to hold you back.
How would you live each moment of each day in such a bright and shining reality? If you truly had it all, what, precisely, would you do with it and who would you become?

As you imagine yourself living out your most treasured dreams, you begin to touch the tangible and authentic purpose behind those dreams. And you come to understand that the person you would become if you truly had it all, is already with you even now.

That purpose which longs to be fulfilled is very much a part of who you are today, no matter how distant your dreams may seem. Those dreams are very much alive in you, and a great portion of their value you already have.

Life is found not in waiting or hoping for anything to come to you. Life is best lived knowing that who you are and what you have is always more than enough.

The best you can imagine is already here, ready to be lived out. Allow it to unfold, moment after moment, day after day, as you experience the magnificent blessing that is your life.

Ralph Marston

#1554
Health and Food / 25 Reasons Why You Should Start Drinking Green Tea Now!
October 16, 2007, 12:13:25 PM


Green tea has increasingly become a very popular drink worldwide because of its immensely powerful health benefits.
It is extraordinarily amazing what green tea can do for your health.
And if you're not drinking 3 to 4 cups of green tea today, you're definitely NOT doing your health a big favor.

Here Are The 25 Reasons Why You Should Start Drinking Green Tea Right Now:

1. Green Tea and Cancer

Green tea helps reduce the risk of cancer.
The antioxidant in green tea is 100 times more effective than vitamin C and 25 times better than vitamin E.
This helps your body at protecting cells from damage believed to be linked to cancer.


2. Green Tea and Heart Disease

Green tea helps prevent heart disease and stroke by lowering the level of cholesterol.
Even after the heart attack, it prevents cell deaths and speeds up the recovery of heart cells.


3. Green Tea and Anti-Aging

Green tea contains antioxidant known as polyphenols which fight against free radicals.
What this means it helps you fight against aging and promotes longevity.

4. Green Tea and Weight Loss

Green tea helps with your body weight loss. Green tea burns fat and boosts your metabolism rate naturally.
It can help you burn up to 70 calories in just one day.
That translates to 7 pounds in one year.


5. Green Tea and Skin

Antioxidant in green tea protects the skin from the harmful effects of free radicals, which cause wrinkling and skin aging.
Green tea also helps fight against skin cancer.


6. Green Tea and Arthritis

Green tea can help prevent and reduce the risk of rheumatoid arthritis.
Green tea has benefit for your health as it protects the cartilage by blocking the enzyme that destroys cartilage.


7. Green Tea and Bones

The very key to this is high fluoride content found in green tea.
It helps keep your bones strong.
If you drink green tea every day, this will help you preserve your bone density.

8. Green Tea and Cholesterol

Green tea can help lower cholesterol level.
It also improves the ratio of good cholesterol to bad cholesterol, by reducing bad cholesterol level.


9. Green Tea and Obesity

Green tea prevents obesity by stopping the movement of glucose in fat cells.
If you are on a healthy diet, exercise regularly and drink green tea, it is unlikely you'll be obese.

10. Green Tea and Diabetes

Green tea improves lipid and glucose metabolisms, prevents sharp increases in blood sugar level, and balances your metabolism rate.


11. Green Tea and Alzheimer's

Green tea helps boost your memory.
And although there's no cure for Alzheimer's, it helps slow the process of reduced acetylcholine in the brain, which leads to Alzheimer's.

12. Green Tea and Parkinson's

Antioxidants in green tea helps prevent against cell damage in the brain, which could cause Parkinson's. People drinking green tea also are less likely to progress with Parkinson's.

13. Green Tea and Liver Disease

Green tea helps prevent transplant failure in people with liver failure. Researches showed that green tea destroys harmful free radicals in fatty livers.


14. Green Tea and High Blood Pressure

Green tea helps prevent high blood pressure.
Drinking green tea helps keep your blood pressure down by repressing angiotensin, which leads to high blood pressure.


15. Green Tea and Food Poisoning

Catechin found in green tea can kill bacteria which causes food poisoning and kills the toxins produced by those bacteria.

16. Green Tea and Blood Sugar

Blood sugar tends to increase with age, but polyphenols and polysaccharides in green tea help lower your blood sugar level.


17. Green Tea and Immunity

Polyphenols and flavenoids found in green tea help boost your immune system, making your health stronger in fighting against infections.

18. Green Tea and Cold and Flu

Green tea prevents you from getting a cold or flu.
Vitamin C in green tea helps you treat the flu and the common cold.

19. Green Tea and Asthma

Theophylline in green tea relaxes the muscles which support the bronchial tubes, reducing the severity of asthma.

20. Green Tea and Ear Infection

Green tea helps with ear infection problem.
For natural ear cleaning, soak a cotton ball in green tea and clean the infected ear.

21. Green Tea and Herpes

Green tea increases the effectiveness of topical interferon treatment of herpes.
First green tea compress is applied, and then let the skin dry before the interferon treatment.

22. Green Tea and Tooth Decay

Green tea destroys bacteria and viruses that cause many dental diseases.
It also slows the growth of bacteria which leads to bad breath.


23. Green Tea and Stress

L-theanine, which is a kind of amino acids in green tea, can help relieve stress and anxiety.

24. Green Tea and Allergies

EGCG found in green tea relieves allergies.
So, if you have allergies, you should really consider drinking green tea.


25. Green Tea and HIV

Scientists in Japan have found that EGCG (Epigallocatechin Gallate) in green tea can stop HIV from binding to healthy immune cells.
What this means is that green tea can help stop the HIV virus from spreading.

4warded email

#1555
Philippine Daily News / The ABC of Political Empowerment.
October 16, 2007, 12:08:51 PM

The Filipino-American community's varied reactions to ABC's "Desperate
Housewives" racist slur against Philippine-schooled doctors has brought to
the forefront of debate the issue of political empowerment or, more
appropriately, lack of political empowerment. As one community leader
mentioned, this kind of thing will never happen to African-Americans,
Latinos, and Jews.

In the "Desperate Housewives" episode, the character, Susan Mayer Delfino,
played by actress Teri Hatcher, said: "*Okay, before we go any further, can
I check those diplomas? Because I would just like to make sure they are not
from a med school in the Philippines *." This infuriated Filipinos around
the world. An online petition was started saying, "*We demand a public
apology to the Filipino American community, and we demand the episode be
edited to remove the ignorant and racist remark. We will not allow hateful
messages against our community (or any other oppressed community) to
continue." *Thus far, more than 122,000 have signed the petition. ABC issued
an apology and also promised to remove the controversial part from DVDs and
rebroadcasts of the episode. But should we settle for that? Hell, no! We
believe that that is not enough.

In my last week's article, "*Desperate Housewives' Wake Up Call to Filipinos
*," I proposed a win-win solution to the imbroglio created by the episode. I
stated that instead of a lawsuit and boycott, as suggested by many community
leaders, I recommended that we should be proactive instead -- not reactive
-- and put together an agenda that would give long-term benefits to our
community such as jobs, education and other initiatives. I indicated that we
should convince ABC to open employment opportunities to Filipino-Americans
at all levels -- actors, directors, producers, newscasters, and executives
at ABC and its affiliates.

Jon Melegrito, the Communications Director of the National Federation of
Filipino-American Associations (NaFFAA), forwarded my article to Mr. Robert
Mendez, ABC's Senior Vice President of Diversity. Mr. Mendez responded to
Mr. Melegrito and he agreed to explore a program that might help increase
opportunities for Filipinos at ABC. Mr. Mendez also said, "You asked about
the possibility of exploring a program that might help to increase
opportunities for Filipinos at ABC. I am wondering whether you might be
interested in helping to organize a meeting in Washington, DC, where my
staff and I can meet with Filipinos who are interested in pursuing careers
in television and want access to direct information about our many talent
development programs. It would be a wonderful opportunity for ABC to deepen
the talent pool with candidates from the Filipino community."

Mr. Melegrito sent me an email and said, "ABC listened to the points you
raised in your column and here are the results: a) written confirmation that
ABC has deleted the ugly scene from the DH Sept. 30 episode, b) a long-term
relationship with the FilAm community that will open doors to Filipino
Americans and enable them access to positions in ABC as writers, directors,
producers, including an internship & training program. We expect
implementation of this special outreach program within 3-4 months as a
demonstration of ABC's commitment."

The name of the game is "win-win" and that's what we plan to achieve. Both
the Filipino community and ABC would benefit from it. It would give
Filipinos a presence -- and visibility -- in one of the major networks in
the United States. And the benefits would be long-lasting and irreversible
because once Filipino talents are used in ABC programming, the other
networks would follow. However, several community leaders in Northern
California, who formed a new organization called Filipino Anti-Defamation
Coalition, were not happy with the "win-win" initiative. One of the leaders,
an attorney, was critical of the initiative. He insisted that a lawsuit and
a boycott are the way to go. Being a lawyer, I can understand where he was
coming from. However, in my humble opinion, going to court would be
counter-productive and would only benefit those who could prove to a jury
that the slur damaged their profession and hurt their practice.

A few days ago, I received an email from Atty. Roman Mosqueda. He said: "I
am *willing to file a complaint for several Philippine-educated physicians
in California, who will take time out from their practice to prove their
damages (special, general and exemplary) on a contingency arrangement. Each
individual physicians (sic) who are filing a complaint in California will
have to prove special, general and/or exemplary damages. Thus, I have to get
a commitment from at least fifty (50) doctors coming from different
Philippine medical schools that they would devote time to this case, as well
as share in the expenses of litigation. I cannot solicit clients." *He
clarified that his attorney's fee is on contingency basis; however, he said
that "*legal cost such as filing fees, process serving fees, deposition
fees, expert fees, subpoena fees, jury fees, are for the account of the
client." *The question is: Are there 50 Filipino doctors in California who
are willing to pay the fees enumerated by Atty. Mosqueda and prove beyond
reasonable doubt that their practice has been damaged financially by the
slur? It is interesting to note that the Filipino Anti-Defamation Coalition
plans to file a $500 million lawsuit as soon as 50 Filipino doctors agree to
become plaintiffs. If they win the case, that's $10 million for each
plaintiff. The question is: are the doctors going to pocket the money or
give it to noble Filipino projects?

Paul Dalde, a member of the Filam-Forum in the Internet commented, "Win-win
initiative is always better, always. In every negotiation the one that
finally carried out is the win-win situation. We should not look for
absolute victory in a dispute because that victory will not result to
permanency, just a temporary one." Indeed, history has taught us so. But
what I like most is what Paul said, "Any day its Win-Win that wins the day!"


The ABC incident cannot be reversed. It happened and has left a scar. A wise
man once said to me, "Perry, what is important is not how to resolve a
problem but how to turn that problem into an opportunity." How true. Years
ago when I was working as a computer programmer analyst, I went to my boss
and said, "I'm sorry but I have a complaint…" He cut me out and said, "Don't
be sorry because you are just about to give me an opportunity to make this a
better place to work."

The ABC issue could be a grand opportunity to empower our community and
improve the quality of our lives. There shouldn't be any problem with
pursuing a "win-win" initiative, a lawsuit, and a boycott -- all at once.
Why not? In my opinion, these three are complementary to each other;
however, they should be pursued with solidarity. And if we can achieve
solidarity, then we can say that we have finally matured as a community of
kindred people. And that would lead to political empowerment.


PerryScope

Perry Diaz
#1556
Bible Study / This Pastor has guts!!
October 16, 2007, 12:04:36 PM
This Pastor has guts!! Thought you might enjoy this
interesting prayer given in Kansas at the opening session of
their Senate. It seems prayer still upsets some people. Please
read.

When Minister Joe Wright was asked to open the new session
of the Kansas Senate, everyone was expecting the usual
generalities, but this is what they heard:

"Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask your
forgiveness and to seek your direction and guidance.
We know Your Word says, 'Woe to those who call evil good,' but
that is exactly what we have done. We have lost our spiritual
equilibrium and reversed our values.
We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery.
We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare.
We have killed our unborn and called it choice.
We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable.
We have neglected to discipline our children
and called it building self esteem.
We have abused power and called it politics.
We have coveted our neighbor's possessions and called it ambition.
We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and
called it freedom of speech and expression.
We have ridiculed the time honored values of our forefathers
and called it enlightenment.

Search us, Oh, God, and know our hearts today;
cleanse us from every sin and set us free. Amen!"

The response was immediate. A number of
legislators walked out during the prayer in protest.
In 6 short weeks, Central Christian Church,
where Rev. Wright is pastor, logged more than 5,000 phone calls
with only 47 of those calls responding negatively. The church is
now receiving international requests for copies of this prayer from
India, Africa and Korea.

Commentator Paul Harvey aired this prayer on
his radio program, "The Rest of the Story," and received a larger
response to this program than any other he has ever aired.

With the Lord's help, may this prayer sweep
over our nation and wholeheartedly become our desire so that we
again can be called "one nation under God."

If possible, please pass this prayer on to your friends. "If you
don't stand for something, you will fall for anything."

forwarded email.
#1557
Bible Study / Re: Mike needs our prayers.
October 16, 2007, 12:01:19 PM
my prayers for his dad's fast recovery..
#1558
Introduce Yourself / Re: A Day with the TB Catalyst (Bohol)
October 16, 2007, 11:56:42 AM
We wish the grand GIANT TB EB..
#1559
Jokes and Humor / Re: Mangatawa Usa Ta.
October 15, 2007, 12:54:45 PM
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING

Memo to all employees:

In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.).

We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T. than anyone else. If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the course, please see your supervisor. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list, and our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you get all the S. H. I. T. you can handle.

Employees who don't take their S. H. I.T. will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.). Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING
( E.A.T.S.H.I.T.). Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they don't have to do S.H.I.T. anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T. already. If you are full of S.H.I.T.,you may be interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.). For employees who are intending to pursue a career in management and consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T.).
This course emphasizes how to manage M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T. If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF
TEACHING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T.).

Thank you,
BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T.)


#1560
Jokes and Humor / Re: Actual call center conversations!
October 15, 2007, 12:49:00 PM
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "OK."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."
#1561
Jokes and Humor / Re: It's Joke Time Again!!!
October 15, 2007, 12:31:25 PM
anak: tay palit ta ug pan..
tatay: ok palitan ka nako
anak: tay palit napod ta ug mangga
tatay: ok palitan ka nako
anak: tay naay nag singgit ug news paper palit ta tay
tatay: saba diha anak sagol sagol naman ng imong gikaon kaon ug pan kaon ug mangga karon papalit napod ug news paper...mag kalibanga baya ka anak...
#1562
Jokes and Humor / Re: TEXT JOKS
October 15, 2007, 12:25:09 PM
Titser;Unsa my gilihi sa imo nga puti man ka kaayo? BATA;butong mam.. Titser;nganong flat man imong ilong? Bata; makalagot man c mama oy,giapil man ang palwa:"
#1563
Jokes and Humor / Re: Funny Pictures
October 15, 2007, 12:18:40 PM




Wow these are some sexy towels. Where can I get of hold of them?
#1564
Jokes and Humor / Re: Mangatawa Usa Ta.
October 15, 2007, 12:07:30 PM
MGA KASABIHAN...

"Magkasinlakas lang ang muscles namin ni Pacquiao,
pero hindi talaga ako ang kalaban niya, bakit ba ang kulit ninyo?!" - VINA MORALES
***
"Anong akala mo sa akin, mayaman?! Nauubusan din ako ng pera!" - ATM
***
"You never even thanked me for making you happy,then you throw me away
just like that... I hate you for using me, for making my life full of sh**..." - TOILET PAPER
***
"Huwag po nating salubungin ang mga bumababa. Hindi po natin sila kamag-anak." - LRT OPERATOR
***
"Napaka-unfair ng buhay sa mundo... Bakit hindi ako pwedeng magmahal?!" - UKAY-UKAY
***
"You know, I feel I'm relaxing...you know... Thanks for da God...
To all Filipino, thanks for da supporti ng wid me..." - MANNY PACQUIAO
***
''Biktima rin ako ng abortion." - BALUT
*** ***
"Huwag mong sabihing pinaiyak kita dahil una mo akong sinaktan." - SIBUYAS
***
"Panakip-butas lang ba talaga ako?" - PANTY
***
"Halika, pag-initin mo ako! Kailangan kong p umutok upang ako'y iyong
matikman at ika'y masarapan...ayaaan na! Malapit na!!! Puputok na!!! Aaaaahhhh..." - POPCORN
***
"Huwag mo akong sisihin kung cold man ako dahil
hindi naman ako magmamatigas kung binigyan mo lang sana ako ng konting importansya!" - KANING LAMIG
***
"Hindi lahat ng alak, nakalalasing." - ALAK-SAN
***
"Hindi lahat ng 13, malas." - 13th MONTH PAY
***
"Hindi lahat ng lumilipad ay superhero." - MANANANGGAL
***
"Hindi lahat ng bumabagsak ay nagsa-summer." - ERIK MORALES
***
"Hindi lahat ng ngipin ay puti." - BLUETOOTH
***
"Nandito ako sa harap ng bahay ninyo." - GATE
***
"Bakit mo 'ko binibitin kung kailan kainitan at basang -basa ako?" - SINAMPAY
***
"Lagi mo akong yakap. Nakapatong lagi ang hita mo sa
katawan ko. 'Yun pala, tutulugan mo lang ako..." - UNAN
***
"Masayang-masaya ako, kasi, ang dami kong date!" - KALENDARYO
***
"Nagtatanong lang naman ako pero huwag mo naman
akong murahin kapag hindi mo masagot." - TEST PAPER
***
"Ang sarap haplusin ng buo mong katawan... at dumampi sa parteng ako lang ang nakagagawa.
Masarap, di ba? Pero bandang huli,iiwan mo lang ako sa isang tabi..." - TUWALYA
#1565
Facts and Trivia / Re: Oldest sex manual in the world
October 15, 2007, 11:56:10 AM
sorry GEC.. nabasahan kolang yan..ako lang gi share..
#1566
Facts and Trivia / Struck by lightning record seven times
October 15, 2007, 01:25:42 AM


US Park Ranger Roy C. Sullivan from Virginia holds the record for the person most times struck by lightning - and living to tell the tale. Between 1942 and 1983, Roy has the dubious distinction of being struck by lightning seven times. He was known as the Human Lightning Rod.

The first lightning strike in 1942 happened as he was working up in a lookout tower and the lighting bolt shot through his leg and knocked his big toenail off.

In 1969 while he was driving along a mountain road a second strike burned off his eyebrows and knocked him unconscious. Another strike just a year later, while he was walking across his yard to get the mail, left his shoulder seared.

He was standing in the office at the ranger station in 1972 when lightning set his hair on fire and Roy had to throw a bucket of water over his head to cool off. A year later, after his hair had grown back, a lightning bolt ripped through his hat and hit him on the head, setting his hair on fire again. It threw him out of his truck, knocked his left shoe off and seared his legs. A sixth strike hit him in 1976 while he was checking on a campsite, injuring his ankle.

The last lightning bolt to hit Roy in 1977 happened while he was fishing. It sent him to hospital with chest and stomach burns.

Roy Sullivan was never killed by lighting - he committed suicide while in his 70's in 1983 reportedly distraught over the loss of a woman. source: weird news
#1567
Facts and Trivia / Oldest Sex Manual in the World
October 15, 2007, 01:24:52 AM
The oldest sex manuals in the world are the Chinese 'Handbooks of Sex' written 5,000 years ago by the legendary Yellow Emperor Huang-Ti (2697-2598 B.C.)

Huang-Ti is credited with founding the Chinese nation and under this legendary ruler agriculture and husbandry and the silk clothing industry developed and flourished.

As well as the 'Handbooks of Sex' it is also believed that the 'Tao of Love Coupling' originated from Huang-ti. The Yellow Emperor is said to have had three female sex advisors, the Plain Girl (Su-nui), the Mystery Girl (Shuen-nui) and the Harvest Girl (Tsai-nui), and one male sex doctor, Pong Tsu. Their conversations (Questions & Answers) were compiled into a book entitled Su-Nui Ching, named after Su-nui. This book became the sexual bible and medical guidebook for many generations.

#1568
Bible Study / Re: Christian Words..
October 15, 2007, 01:22:06 AM
That wisdom which cannot teach me that God is love, shall ever pass for folly.

John Owen
#1569
Inspiration & Hope / Humility
October 15, 2007, 01:20:21 AM
In addition to persistent, ongoing effort, continued success requires humility. If you grow arrogant after a few accomplishments, you're not likely to have many more.
With each success you gain more confidence, and that's great. When you've done it before, you know that you can do it again.

Yet even as your confidence level grows higher and higher, do not make the mistake of discarding your humility. For humility keeps you reasonable, respectful, thankful, thoughtful and realistic, and those are all qualities essential for continued success.

Thinking that you're entitled to something just because you want it is a reliable recipe for failure and disappointment. Humility reminds you that in order to receive value, you must create value in equal measure.

While it is certainly possible to accomplish things without humility, those accomplishments will be empty and short-lived. Those people who enjoy meaningful success and fulfillment year after year and decade after decade are those people who know the value of humility.

Choose to be strong enough and smart enough to live with genuine humility. The rewards for doing so will show up throughout your whole life.

Ralph Marston
#1570
Inspiration & Hope / Purpose
October 15, 2007, 01:19:31 AM
Somewhere inside, somehow you know that there's a purpose for you on this day. Let that purpose come to the surface and bring it fully to life.
Authentic purpose is not a deep, dark secret that you must struggle to discover. Decide to allow it, and purpose will find you where you are.

Purpose is not so much a matter of what you do. Purpose is more about the way you feel while doing whatever it is you are doing.

Those things you know without having to learn, connect you to purpose. Purpose is not merely what you think you might believe, but what you're certain that you are.

Purpose is the unconditional, limitless realm in your life that cannot be diminished by anything that happens. Whatever you undertake from the sense of that purpose brings great fulfillment and richness to life.

Always you have known that there is purpose within you, a purpose essential to who you are. Give it to life again and again, for you'll never tire of seeing its shine.

Ralph Marston
#1571
Inspiration & Hope / Harvest the rewards
October 15, 2007, 01:18:16 AM
The influence of each action continues long after the action has been completed. The power of each thought resonates far into the future.
Think and act as if each thing you do will start a chain reaction. Because that's exactly what will happen.

Exercise control over the big, obvious issues in life and you'll have some measure of success. Learn also to control, direct and focus all the thousands of little things that few people ever even think about, and your success will be great indeed.

Each tiny little fraction of a moment is an opportunity to make a difference. Bundle all those opportunities together in the service of your goals, and they will bring spectacular results.

With each and every thing you do, with each thought you think, with every word you speak, you are planting seeds. Those seeds continue to grow, long after the moment has passed.

When a positive, purposeful attitude permeates your life, those seeds you plant will develop into powerful, enduring expressions of your most authentic self. Give your best to each moment, and you'll harvest the rewards over and over again.

Ralph Marston
#1572
Anonymous Diary Blog / Re: i'm back
October 14, 2007, 01:38:22 PM
nakadaghan nakag anikad lumine???
#1573
Facts and Trivia / Re: DID YOU KNOW
October 14, 2007, 01:34:14 PM
It is impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.
#1574
Facts and Trivia / Life in the 1500s
October 14, 2007, 01:27:16 PM

The next time you're washing yourself and complain that the water temperature isn't to your liking, think how it was for the unfortunate people living in the 1500s.

Most people married in June because they took their yearly bath in May and still smelled pretty good in June. However, they were starting to smell so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the sons and other men, then the women, and finally the children - last of all the babies. By then, the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it; hence the saying, "don't throw the baby out with the bath water."

Houses had thatched roofs; thick straw, piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the dogs, cats and other small animals (mice, rats, and bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained, it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof; hence the saying "it's raining cats and dogs." There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This was a real problem in the bedroom, where bugs and other droppings could really mess up your nice clean bed. A bed with big posts and a sheet over the top afforded some protection. That's how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt; hence the saying, "dirt poor."

The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh on the floor to help their footing. As the winter wore on, they kept adding more thresh until it would all start slipping outside when you opened the door. A piece of wood was placed in the entranceway, a "thresh hold."

In those days people cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight, then start over the next day. Sometimes the stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while; hence the rhyme, "peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old."

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which was quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man "could bring home the bacon." They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and "chew the fat."

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with a high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning and death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Most people did not have pewter plates, but had trenchers, a piece of wood with the middle scooped out like a bowl. Often trenchers were made from stale bread which was so old and hard that it could be used for quite some time. Trenchers were never washed. Sometimes worms and mold got into the wood and old bread. After eating off wormy, moldy trenchers, one would get "trench mouth."

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burned bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or "upper crust."
Lead cups were used to drink ale or whiskey. The combination would sometimes knock people out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up; hence the custom of holding a "wake."

England is old and small, and they started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and take the bones to a "bone house" and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 were found to have scratch marks on the inside, and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground, and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the "graveyard shift") to listen for the bell; thus someone could be "saved by the bell" or was considered a "dead ringer."

And that's the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth...whoever said history was boring?  

source: weird news
#1575
Facts and Trivia / Struck by lightning record seven times
October 14, 2007, 01:24:47 PM

US Park Ranger Roy C. Sullivan from Virginia holds the record for the person most times struck by lightning - and living to tell the tale. Between 1942 and 1983, Roy has the dubious distinction of being struck by lightning seven times. He was known as the Human Lightning Rod.

The first lightning strike in 1942 happened as he was working up in a lookout tower and the lighting bolt shot through his leg and knocked his big toenail off.

In 1969 while he was driving along a mountain road a second strike burned off his eyebrows and knocked him unconscious. Another strike just a year later, while he was walking across his yard to get the mail, left his shoulder seared.

He was standing in the office at the ranger station in 1972 when lightning set his hair on fire and Roy had to throw a bucket of water over his head to cool off. A year later, after his hair had grown back, a lightning bolt ripped through his hat and hit him on the head, setting his hair on fire again. It threw him out of his truck, knocked his left shoe off and seared his legs. A sixth strike hit him in 1976 while he was checking on a campsite, injuring his ankle.

The last lightning bolt to hit Roy in 1977 happened while he was fishing. It sent him to hospital with chest and stomach burns.

Roy Sullivan was never killed by lighting - he committed suicide while in his 70's in 1983 reportedly distraught over the loss of a woman. 

source: weird news

#1576
Philippine Business News / Re: Guess Who: Kinsa Ni Sila From Tubag Bohol?
October 13, 2007, 05:20:38 PM
saon nalang ni dili man ko bonifid members..
#1577
Love Talk / Re: Ingon ang mga Dalaga..
October 11, 2007, 12:37:12 PM
Quote from: Barbaro on September 19, 2007, 08:11:11 AM
She said... (Matud pa sa Checks)


1. kamong mga laki, kung mo tan-aw gani
ang mga babae sa inyo, ayaw pod pag feeling2x
nga naka angay mi nu? maka turn off na sha...

2. kung mag ask gani mo date, ayaw kayu mo
ngisi nga mura nag maniac tan-awon kay
mahadlok pod baya mi...

3. kung mo sabay gani mo sa amo, pagsinina
pod mog tarong dili nang murag tambay... para
mo samot mig ka in lab ninyo bah...pamulbos
gamay, pangkolon gamay... panudlay gamay...

4. kung manguyab na gani mo, ayaw ug sulti
nga "pwede ko manguyab nimo? or naa koy
chance?" kay kung tubagon namo na, mura
nag gisugot mo namo...

5. kung sugton na gani mo namo, taronga pod mi
oi... dili kay biyaan na lang, usahay himuon pang
sulugoon... maid inyong gipangita?

6. do not forget to remind us that you love us...
para kiligon sad mi panagsa...hehehe

7. ayaw mog pangita ug lain kay wa nay lami!

8. kung makigbulag na gani mo, ayaw ninyo ingna
ang girl nga "you're just nothing to me now,
understand!" hehehe... sakit baya nah...

9.ayaw pud ninyo hulata nga kami mouna ug
pansin ninyo if ever magkita ta somewhere hah...

mao ra to...walay masuko...pildi ang maglagot...hehehe

He said...
Para sa mga babae...


1. Kung muingon mi nga gwapa ka, ayaw dayon
tubag ug "atik!"...Panagsa ra mi mu dayeg ug
gwapa...obyusleh, kung gitawag ka nga "gwapa"
naa jud mi enteres nimo...kinsa man sad kuno ang
tarong nga laki tawagon kang "bati'g nawong!"
atubangan sa kadaghanan...Di kaha mi katilaw ug
plying kick ana?

2. Mangutana gani mi kung kanus-a imong RD
(rest day) ug kung abelabol ba ka ana, kana
nagpasabot kung pwede ba ka ma detdet
(DATE ba sa iningles)...ayaw sab mi baraha
kay mangutana lagi mi nimu ug strait...amo
lang gityming-tyming kay mauwawon man
sab tawon mi...

3. Kung nakabantay na ka nga nagsige na mi
ug sunod-sunod nimo, maka-baynte na mi
ug grit nimo gud morning, or ikaw na lang
pirmi tagdon, makig dungan ug uli bisan nort
ug sawt, langit ug lupa ang gilay-on sa atong
balay wid matching "Ako lang dala sa imo
tings beh!", kana ganahan jud mi nimo...
Pero sa pirmi natong kinuyog ug detdet
(DATE sa iningles pa), ayaw sab pangutana
ug dali-dali "Wat r we?" or sa binisaya pa,
"Unsa man jud diay ta?"... Inahak, makulbaan baya
sab mi gamay ... we also feel a bit presyur...
Kalma lang gud...musulti lagi mi in dyu taym.

4. Kung kahibawo na jud ka nga ganahan mi
nimo kay nisulti na man jud mi (hala ka!)
Ayaw sad sige hisgot sa imo Ex-boypren
oi...its hurt man sad...not unlis kung nisturya
ka sa panahong gigukod siya sa inyong IRO
nga nisutoy siya ug dagan kay por syur I will lap
wid u...

5. Hangyo lang sad, kung nakakita ka sa
imong crush o di ba kaha nakakita ka ug laki
nga purting gwapoha, ayaw sad panguhit
namo, "Gwapo kaayo siya noh?" Hala plis! Laki
intawon mi ug dili pud mi kiligon sa imong
crush... Masuko ra ba mo kung mu comentaryo
mi, "Gwapo pa man akong lolo ana!"

6. Sa panahon nga mag-date na tah, por syur
kami man jud gasto, be konsyus wid yor dayet ha
para konsyus pud mi sa among bulsa...kung kada
adlaw na ta date ug nakabantay mo nga chippy ug
tubig na lang among gi-order, KKB na ta
hah...salamat sa pagsabot.

7. But op cors labaw sa tanan, ayaw kayu ni
ninyo siryusuha kay basin mu comentaryo
mo, mapikon mo ug ibalik ni ninyo nako,
Dyok dyok ra ni oi...dalang tinoud...hehehe

8. Pero kung dili na jud madala kay naglagot
jud mong mga babaye ani...Iporward sa tanang
babaye nga kaila ninyo nga wala pa makabasa...
Pag porma dayon mo ug grupo nga Gabriella (lugar
chapter ninyo)

9. Sa mga lalake, kalingawi lang ni ninyo ug porward
pero ayaw sa inyong naibgan kay basin instant
basted niya mo ana!

Pahabol: Kung magpakuyog mo mirkado...ayaw
pud mi paalsaha ug usa ka sakong bugas... Kilo-
kiloha lang pud ntawon na...maluoy mo...
#1578
Science and Research / Re: How often should you have sex?
October 09, 2007, 08:16:13 AM
Once every two days.or twice a day or three. Who ever dont dosent have a good sex life. There is no 'normal' regarding this subject...   
#1579
Jokes and Humor / Re: Funny Pictures
October 09, 2007, 07:46:03 AM
Heaven & Hell


Go on think about it. Wouldn't it be the perfect place if the police were British, the chefs Italian, the mechanics German, the lovers French and everthing was organized by the Swiss?
Now that would be absolute Heaven.
But what if the police were German, the chefs British, the mechanics French, the lovers Swiss and it was all organized by the Italians?
Then you would really know you were in hell.



#1580
Introduce Yourself / Re: If you had to describe yourself using three words, it would be…
October 09, 2007, 07:33:51 AM
Sincere , appreciative, trustworthy, kind ,reliable.---- sorry you only wanted three .
#1581
Weird and Extreme / Great balls of fire! Russian woman sets fire to ex-husband's penis.
October 09, 2007, 07:29:24 AM
News
Oct 5, 2007
by Gulliver
weird news.


A Moscow woman burnt her ex-husband's penis in a fit of anger as he was watching TV naked and sipping vodka.

The man was taken to hospital with burns all over his body, but his jealous ex-wife did not feel guilty at all, according to the Tvoi Den newspaper.

"It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told the newspaper. "I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."

The woman named only as Irina, 41, was married to the man Dmitry, 48, for 19 years. The couple divorced three years ago but shared the same apartment afterwards.

Irina took her revenge on Dmity when he sitting watching an adult program on a night TV channel. First his ex-wife grabbed a bottle of vodka, spilled some on him and tried to set him on fire with a match. But the flame died out and her attempt failed.

Then Irina made a wick of a newspaper and threw the burning paper aiming at the man's crotch. Dmitry told doctors that he had felt terrible pain but could not extinguish the fire. He started burning like a torch.

Doctors said that Dmitry could have burned alive if the woman had not called an ambulance. Severe burns were found on the man's arms, legs, chest and penis.

The lesson for Russian men is don't annoy fiery ex-wives, if you want to keep your manhood intact.
#1582
Jokes and Humor / Re: TEXT JOKS
October 09, 2007, 07:15:41 AM
Man1: Away kami ni misis, nag-Historical siya
Man2: Pare baka ang ibig mo sabihin ay nag-Hysterical
Man1: Hinde, historical kasi inungkat lahat ng kasalanan ko!"
#1583
Facts and Trivia / Re: DID YOU KNOW
October 09, 2007, 07:12:49 AM
Each King on playing cards represent a king in real History.

Spades   : King David
Clubs      : Alexander The Great
Heatrs    : Charlemagne
Diamonds: Julius Cesar.
#1584
Question and Answer / Re: What kind of liquor do you prefer?
October 09, 2007, 06:44:29 AM
wahahha.. gipatulan gyod ko dah..

bitaw mouli gyod bitaw ko bisan unsa kahabog,bisan moagi ko ug ka santilmohan ug pito ka buntod,
ug ang sapa nag ulbo ulbo molabang gyod ko para maka uli.
#1585
Question and Answer / Re: What kind of liquor do you prefer?
October 09, 2007, 06:25:03 AM
unsay experience nimo mikey?

bisan unsa nako kahubog mouli gyod ko.. pero ug dili na kaya gyod ug managan
na ng mga balay na akong hulaton nalang among balay moagi. joks..
#1586
Help & Support / Re: One of the Reasons why Tubag Bohol was created
October 09, 2007, 06:18:39 AM
Thanks Mike.. More Power.. God Bless U always..
#1587
Help & Support / Re: From Visa Holder to Permanent Residence in Bohol
October 09, 2007, 06:15:46 AM
post more until u rech 500..
#1588
Question and Answer / Re: What kind of liquor do you prefer?
October 09, 2007, 06:11:17 AM
na ignoy ko sa boracay nimo ginger dah?
#1589
Science and Research / Re: How often should you have sex?
October 09, 2007, 05:37:59 AM
murag maka  na oi.. kaya man gani mokaon ug 3 times aday..kaya pwedi sad naay merienda..
#1590
Inspiration & Hope / Real treasure to be found
October 09, 2007, 03:31:41 AM

If you're always chasing happiness, it will never be able to find you. Relax, simply give happiness a place to live in you, and it will be in great abundance.
When you put conditions on enjoyment, it turns into just another chore. Let go, and sincerely enjoy the miracle that is your life as it comes to you in each moment.

If you become overly attached to specific results, you set yourself up for disappointment and disillusionment. Be ambitious, yet do not be your ambition.

Sometimes, when things fail to go the way you planned, they turn out better than you could have possibly expected. Welcome life's surprises and choose to see the positive value that is in each one of them.

Don't be too quick to place judgments on the people, situations and events in your life. In everything that comes along, there is an opportunity for you to more fully discover and express your true purpose.

Be open to whatever life brings your way. There is real treasure to be found in it all.

Ralph Marston

#1591
Bible Study / Re: Christian Words..
October 09, 2007, 03:27:34 AM
The Word of God can grow to be only a hunting-ground for texts; and we can preach, meaning intensely every word we utter, and yet in reality only lost for the moment like an actor in his part, or at least leaving it to the folk to live it out; for us, bless me, we have no time for that, but are already immersed, poor harried souls, in determining what we shall preach on next.
         .A. J. Gossip,
#1592
Introduce Yourself / Re: How Is Your Day?
October 09, 2007, 03:19:49 AM
Quote from: Ginger on October 09, 2007, 03:11:13 AM
bitaw no unya mo adto dayun ta sa isla nila...hehehe


alam nyo kung ano den lami..Tahong na gi turbo or oven. butangan ang tahong ug init tubig, den ug okab na sya pikason den butangon ug kikoman suace ug cheez.. den  eturbo or oven  for 5 mins. yum yum
#1593
Question and Answer / Re: What kind of liquor do you prefer?
October 09, 2007, 03:11:19 AM
Quote from: ms da binsi on October 08, 2007, 10:53:40 AM



unsa man na?

unsa man ang sho???

ms da binsi..

mix with 1 bottle of beer, 1 bottle of shoktong and 1 bottle of coke 12 onz..

good for 2 or 3 person..kung mabitin BILOG napod as GIN.
#1594
Question and Answer / Re: What is your favorite movie?
October 09, 2007, 03:07:19 AM
for me i like God Must be Crazy   buhak buhak mo ug katawa hangtod maka ihi mo sa banig.
#1595
Question and Answer / Re: What kind of liquor do you prefer?
October 08, 2007, 10:50:03 AM
for me i love
beershocoke + Gin..

sorry guys master ko ani.. sunog baga.. ;D ;D ;D
#1596
Jokes and Humor / Re: Funny Pictures
October 08, 2007, 06:27:50 AM




As our cute little poem here says: "Smiling is infectious, you catch it like the flu,
When someone smiled at me today, I started smiling too."

So go on give the world a smile. Make a friend, a family member, a love, a neighbor, feel better by lighting up their day with your smile.

It cost nothing but it leaves the world a better and a happier place.
#1597
Inspiration & Hope / Re: Morning and Evening
October 08, 2007, 05:48:32 AM
Quote from: Ginger on October 08, 2007, 05:42:01 AM
I want to call him langga. :D
hello langga.. he he he peace..
#1598
Inspiration & Hope / Re: Morning and Evening
October 08, 2007, 05:47:48 AM
Quote from: Bambi on October 08, 2007, 04:12:10 AM
Normally, a day starts with morning and ended with evening life events,  but it seems that my day started and ended with TB. My hubby said, SCHATZ, you are already addicted! Barbaro, please help me pray to lessen this morning and evening sickness. ;)
dali rana mommy bams.. magrehab..
#1599
Bohol Tourism | Bohol Travel & Tour / Re: cool shout box
October 08, 2007, 05:44:31 AM
yeahhh.. its cooooool tnx MIKE more power..
#1600
Facts and Trivia / Here comes the bride - number 12
October 08, 2007, 05:36:53 AM

Swaziland's King Mswati III selected bride number 12, less than a week after he picked his 11th bride from thousands of young Swazi maidens.

Mswati's 12th bride was identified as 18-year-old Nomonde Fihla, who was crowned the first princess in the Miss Swaziland 2003 pageant.

In an interview at the time, she told a magazine she did not believe in polygamy.

Fihla was one of thousands of maidens who attended this year's annual reed dance ceremony, when the king, 35, chooses a bride. In the traditional ceremony, the young women dressed in little more than beads and traditional skirts dance before the king to impress him.

Mswati is Africa's last absolute monarch. He has resisted recent pressure from his subjects to introduce democratic reforms.

source:weird news
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