Haven't been here for a while...but this is a good read.
10 years ago, I was a freshman in UPDil when my parents caught me joining EDSA II and promptly deported me back home to go study in HNU and killed off my aspirations to go to UP Law.
Looking back, doing that was probably the best thing that happened to me. I took accounting...got drunk every night with my girlfriends, managed to hang on to the Dean's list and got married when I was 20. No, didn't get preggy, and no kids yet after 6+yrs of marriage.
My point is, its easy to be idealistic when we're young. Easier to berate and go on and on about others when we are in our ivory tower in academe. I moved out of the Philippines and relocated to the US when I was 21 and boy was it an eye opener. No matter how much things are supposed to work in theory, in real life, it simply does not work. REALLY.
I hate to offend anybody but we Filipinos have our own smarts and dumbos, have our own hard workers and juan tamads, our own disgraceful tramps and respectable dames. 5 years living and working in Houston has taught me as much. A quick 3 week trip to Hong Kong educated me more.
While my husband and I ( 33 and 27 respectively) work day in and day out to provide for our life, we see a lot of young filipina girls in their teens...(17,18, 19) marry 50 some yo men and do not work. Rather, spend their days lounging around gossiping in the filipino store. On the upside...I go to any hospital here and I kid you not, ICU nurses, specialized head nurses, you're bound to find a handful of normal hard working Pinays who are the nicest people on earth.
While there are times that I hear families of men in the US military trash Filipinas because their son or nephew brought home a hooker from Angeles City and now she's cheating left and right, I also hear an equal number of praise from other American families who married a Filipina or Filipino about how family oriented we are and how we are a great addition to their family.
Its good to try to make everybody feel good about being Filipino but in reality, we are all thesame. There is such a thing as The Universality of the Human Experience. We may differ in culture or in the color of our skin, but we are all thesame. The only difference I can see is in the general attitude about life.
Think about powerful countries...they're not perfect. In the US, there are tons of things that I would rally against if I had the time or energy. Heck, I don't think our president is doing a great job and a lot of our senators look like idiots on national TV. I would bet my bottom dollar that Philippine Political TV is just as entertaining. (sorry, I don't have TFC, not worth $30/mo when I just tv watch less than 3 hrs total a week)
The difference that I see is the pride in oneself to be part of a collective group. Here in Texas, people are damn proud to be Texan. The ones that weren't born here are proud to be an adopted Texan...and if you were in Florida, you'd see "i love Florida"...hell, think about those " I (heart) New York" shirts. Slogans like that arent just slogans or prints on a shirt. People really do feel that way. I have not seen anybody in my life...well Filipino anyway that is and was openly proud of where he or she is from.
I brag about Bohol, my friends brag about where they're from but nobody gets into bar fights because we think our province is better than the other.
The Italians here are proud to be Italians. They are proud to be Texan, proud to be American. But they are also proud to be Italian. Same goes to the Irish, even the Polish and the Germans living here.
The Filipinos....hmmm....nobody talks about being proud to be Filipino. Everybody talks about vacationing but nobody really talks about pride in ones roots. Pride in one's work or pride in one's geographical origin. While the Italian, Polish, Russian, Chinese, German, even Iranian restaurants cater to everybody. The Filipino restaurants cater to only the Filipinos and heck, has that air of exclusivity. Not really very smart or bright from a business stand point. Most become a meeting place of the jobless or the illegals and the gossip mongers that interviews every other customer that comes in for lunch or dinner...or heaven forbid, you have white/black/latino friends.
I think we have to love what we are first and make peace with what we have and what we are born with before we can progress. When we look at our "beautiful" candidates, we see mestizos and mestizas..I mean face it, that's what we consider beautiful. When we are in school and some balikbayan becomes our classmate. We automatically assume they are better because they've been overseas...we never look at them as equals rather, most people put them on a pedestal.
Heck, its almost even taboo to openly say that you love yourself or you love the way you look because you can be considered conceited.
Face it folks, our culture does not facilitate for us to grow and be smart and bright. Because if we are smart and bright and openly ambitious, we get shot down faster than anything you can imagine. We are almost scared to try because we are scared to fail...and scared to fail because we will have to face our friends and family who will relish in telling us "MIRISI !!!! AMBISYOSA MAN....WAAAAA"
And if we so succeed in being smart, bright and actually realize our ambitions, heaven forbid we are tired and do not wave at everybody on the way home from work, or nod at each and everyone in church or donate insane amounts of our income to everyone that comes a-knocking on our door. For our hard work, we are expected to share everything with everyone and leave nothing for ourselves lest we be called "hambugero" or "laog". Sad part is...we are expected to share everything with everyone, even those who never does anything for themselves.
Sorry this is a long rant from a long silent period. I just had a trying day with a Filipino client who wants preferential treatment because he's Filipino and I'm Filipino and doesn't respect professional courtesy. I am not being snobbish, but yes, you can call me on my cell...but please, not repeatedly after business hours to ask me to do business favors...arghhhhh!!!!
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