Author Topic: Katawa pud mo diha ... (Read 50673 times)

glacier_71 · « **Reply #160 on:** August 08, 2009, 02:10:29 AM »

little boy was sitting on the curb with a gallon of turpentine, shaking it up and watching all the bubbles. a while later a priest came along and asked the little boy what he had.

the little boy replied," This is the most powerful liquid in the world, it's called turpentine."

the priest said, "No, the most powerful liquid in the world is the holy water. if you take some of this Holy Water and rub it on a pregnant woman's belly, she'll pass a healthy baby."

the little boy replied, "You take some of this turpentine and rub it on a cat's ass, he'll pass a Harley Davidson."

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Moyhua · « **Reply #161 on:** August 12, 2009, 06:31:09 AM »

hala mahilig sad ka ug line dancing Jams? naay line dancing diri gikabuangan sa mga puti, kadtong SHUFFLE nindot baja...taym akong pangitaon..

ah dia ra:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1M9ELEp9ILA

Thanks for posting this. I will practice this kind of line dancing. I love it.

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bol-anon nga cebuano · « **Reply #162 on:** August 13, 2009, 12:31:06 AM »

naay bag-ong dance craze nga gikabuangan sa mga pinoy ron.

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Mulligan · « **Reply #163 on:** August 14, 2009, 10:43:30 AM »

Magbinogoy sa ta.

Lalaking tiguang na Bol-anon ni konsulta sa iyang doktor.

Tiguang.....: Dok, sa akong edad nga 70, unsay imong ekatambang nga sex position?

Doktor.......: Uy iyo, dapat mag suway ka ug "Doggie" position !!!

Tiguang.....: Unsa nang doggie position, iniro ?

Doktor.......: Dili. Simhot simhot nalang ba murag iro...

Happy weekend everyone !

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AsPo · « **Reply #164 on:** August 14, 2009, 11:35:53 AM »

unya bido og kunot masimhotan,mosuka sya sa kabaho.mobalik sa doctor,unsa naman pod i advice ni doc

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Mulligan · « **Reply #165 on:** August 14, 2009, 02:19:41 PM »

Iyo, dapat magbag-o ka ug antipara kay di na ka kaila unsa kunot ug kuan. hehe

unya bido og kunot masimhotan,mosuka sya sa kabaho.mobalik sa doctor,unsa naman pod i advice ni doc

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benelynne · « **Reply #166 on:** August 16, 2009, 11:50:49 AM »

Mangatawa sa ta. True episode ni sa TV.

"Sis" is a talk show here in RP with Gelli and Janice de Belen as hosts. Guest of the day was a controversial starlet named Marian Rivera, ka-love team of an actor named Dingdong Dantes.

Gelli: "How do you find Dingdong, Marian?"
Marian: Nakita ko siya kanina sa lobby.

Ug miyuhom na lang si Gelli.

Gwapa ra ba unta ning bataa. Pang Miss Tourism diay ni iyang kalibre. Check out how some of this year's Miss Tourism contestants fared in the Q&A portion:

Questions and answers during the 2009 Miss Philippine Tourism Contest held at Manila Hotel:

Host : If you had a foreigner friend, where will you bring him to showcase the beauty of the Philippines?
Contestant : Bocaue.
Host : Bocaue. Why Bocaue? There are so many places in the Philippines? Why Bocaue?
Contestant: Because it's a magnificent place.
Host : Which part of Bocaue?
Contestant: The Bocaue Rice Terraces.

Host : What is your best feature?
Contestant : My graduation picture and also my baby picture.

Host : What is you favorite motto?
Contestant : If others can't, why can't I!

Host : What would you like to say to foreigners?
Contestant : Please come back or you shall return.

Host : What is your typical day?
Contestant : I think Saturday po!

Host : If you were to describe the color blue to a blind person, how would you do it?'
Contestant : That is a very good and easy question but is hard to answer.. He! He! He!

Host : What is your edge over the other contestants?
Contestant : My edge? I'm 21 years old, Sir!

Host : What, in your opinion, is the ideal age for marriage?
Contestant: Thirty-five.
Host: Why 35?
Contestant: Because you are already old enough not to make any mistakes.

Host : How do you see yourself 10 years from now?
Contestant: I am now 18, plus 10... I'll be 28!

Host : What is the biggest problem facing the youth today?
Contestant : Drugs!
Host : Why?
Contestant: Kasi it is very expensive na, Sir!

Host : What is the essence of a woman posing nude in magazines?
Contestant : Girls should be proud because when she is naked it is pleasing and essential to men's eyes!

Host : What makes you blush?
Contestant: I don't blush because I have a dark complexion.

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hofelina · « **Reply #167 on:** August 18, 2009, 06:13:50 AM »

Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name.
For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of
Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen.
Amoxil is also call Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.

The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of
government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course,Ibepokin.
Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and
will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as
a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself astiff one. Obviously
we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails",
"highballs" and just a good old-fashioned"stiff drink".. Pepsi will market the new concoction
by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today
than on Alzheimer's research.. This means that by 2040, there should be
a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and
absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

If you don't send this to five old friends right away there will be five fewer people
laughing in the world

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glacier_71 · « **Reply #168 on:** August 18, 2009, 06:34:47 AM »

A granddaughter told her grandmom that she is going to marry a man from Lebanon.

The next day grandmom met some of her friends at a supermarket and she proudly revealed to them about her granddaughter's upcoming wedding. She said, "My granddaughter is going to marry a Lesbian."

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Mulligan · « **Reply #169 on:** August 18, 2009, 09:10:55 AM »

Host.....: If you were to describe the color blue to a blind person, how would you do it?'
Contestant: That is a very good and easy question but is hard to answer.. He! He! He!

Hehe.

Host........... : In your own words, how will you describe Tagbilaran more or less ?
Constestant: More sir.
Host............: What ?
Contestant..: I mean less sir.

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benelynne · « **Reply #170 on:** August 18, 2009, 09:28:31 AM »

Ha ha ha ha

Took me a while to figure out what's funny with the Viagra generic.

Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name.

The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course,Ibepokin.
Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and
will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as
a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself astiff one. Obviously
we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails",
"highballs" and just a good old-fashioned"stiff drink".. Pepsi will market the new concoction
by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

Manay, ug makakatawa pa gani ta ani nga joke, pasabot low risk pa ta sa Alzheimer's. Funny, but this could really be true. Our own president's admission of her breast implant shows that this procedure has really become commonplace.

Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research.. This means that by 2040, there should be
a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and
absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

If you don't send this to five old friends right away there will be five fewer people
laughing in the world

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=19195.0

statesville · « **Reply #171 on:** August 18, 2009, 11:20:46 AM »

I am really amused, katawa pawala sa kapoy gikan sa trabaho,

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fdaray · « **Reply #172 on:** August 18, 2009, 11:38:37 AM »

Ha. ha.... ha..... ha...., laughing is a good exercise.

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statesville · « **Reply #173 on:** August 18, 2009, 11:58:16 AM »

fdaray, nisamot kog kaluyag katawa sa ipong post,

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Raquelproud boholana · « **Reply #174 on:** August 18, 2009, 12:19:55 PM »

akong anak baje ikatulo muot kaayo ni nga picture nacapture nako nagmusgot ang nawong naay gikasuk an apil akong bana muot tan awon dili maot ha.heheheh

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Mulligan · « **Reply #175 on:** August 18, 2009, 01:11:49 PM »

Five signs nga ang lalaki nagkatigulang na:

1. Layo ang panan-aw, nagkaduol ang pagpangihi.

2. Molingkod magduka, naghigda dili makatulog.

3. Nakadumdum pa sa nangagi, nalimtan ang karon.

4. May gihuna-huna ang taas, walay mahimo ang ubos.

5. Sa una gahi nga naghulat, karon maghulat kanus-a mogahi.

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glacier_71 · « **Reply #176 on:** August 18, 2009, 01:14:10 PM »

hahahahahah...ayay

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Mulligan · « **Reply #177 on:** August 18, 2009, 01:30:19 PM »

Wafu man diay neng akong pare Ms. Raquel.

akong anak baje ikatulo muot kaayo ni nga picture nacapture nako nagmusgot ang nawong naay gikasuk an apil akong bana muot tan awon dili maot ha.heheheh

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mistyeyed · « **Reply #178 on:** August 18, 2009, 01:47:37 PM »

Five signs nga ang lalaki nagkatigulang na:

1. Layo ang panan-aw, nagkaduol ang pagpangihi.

2. Molingkod magduka, naghigda dili makatulog.

3. Nakadumdum pa sa nangagi, nalimtan ang karon.

4. May gihuna-huna ang taas, walay mahimo ang ubos.

5. Sa una gahi nga naghulat, karon maghulat kanus-a mogahi.

Hala kalooy ni manoy.Mag duko na ni permi karon.

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Mulligan · « **Reply #179 on:** August 18, 2009, 03:28:07 PM »

Ingon pas taga Valencia diri, tiguang bitaw pero paniti di ba murag maiz anagon.

Hala kalooy ni manoy.Mag duko na ni permi karon.

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Mulligan · « **Reply #180 on:** August 18, 2009, 03:38:02 PM »

Usa ka bol-anon na mang gi-uwawon nipalit ug condom sa tindahan sa Colon, Cebu:

Bol-anon...: Miss, papalita ra ko ug condom. Tagpila ang usa? (medyo hinay na pagka ingon).

Tindira.......: Saiz sir.

Bol-anon....: (Medyo na uwaw). Small lang miss.

Tindira........: Ingon ko sir, tag saiz pesos ba. Wa ko ni ingon na unsa ang size !!!

Bol-anon....: Aw eh! Abe naho ug sani nga size. Presyo diay tag saiz!

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Bambi · « **Reply #181 on:** August 18, 2009, 04:53:31 PM »

Five signs nga ang lalaki nagkatigulang na:

1. Layo ang panan-aw, nagkaduol ang pagpangihi.

2. Molingkod magduka, naghigda dili makatulog.

3. Nakadumdum pa sa nangagi, nalimtan ang karon.

4. May gihuna-huna ang taas, walay mahimo ang ubos.

5. Sa una gahi nga naghulat, karon maghulat kanus-a mogahi.

whahahaha i love this! abi naho ug kami rang mga babaye ang matigulang. I used to hear what the opposite says: "Men will never get older but wiser"! Bedo, good job! Just put in mind that "Sex of the olds ...banat nalang ug Kaon ug lami"

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Bambi · « **Reply #182 on:** August 18, 2009, 04:56:13 PM »

Wafu man diay neng akong pare Ms. Raquel.

Ms. Raquel, thanks for posting this. Your daughter is very cute and beautiful. She is more familiar to you. Congrats for having a wonderful Family, boutan nga bana and healthy kids!

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Raquelproud boholana · « **Reply #183 on:** August 18, 2009, 08:36:58 PM »

Wafu man diay neng akong pare Ms. Raquel.

Kana nga picture sa akong bana maot na heheheh pero gwapo ni siya in person ug naa pay jutay buhok sa atubangan.Di na siya photogenic picturan jud lahi ra,di gani na siya ganahan picturan kay upaw kono siya tan awon sa resulta ang ang kay pinaskin head man pud ug tupi.Sija ray mag awot awot sa iyang jutay na nga buhok.
Bol-anon kaajo nig kinaija very kind and generous ug prudent sa kwarta.

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mike · « **Reply #184 on:** August 18, 2009, 08:54:33 PM »

akong anak baje ikatulo muot kaayo ni nga picture nacapture nako nagmusgot ang nawong naay gikasuk an apil akong bana muot tan awon dili maot ha.heheheh

Unsay baby nimo ate raqs?

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glacier_71 · « **Reply #185 on:** August 19, 2009, 09:32:03 PM »

yaya at si SIR

si SIR: yaya, kaw ba yong nasa loob ng CR? kukunin ko lang toothbrush ko

yaya: sandali lang po! naka-panty lang ako.

si SIR: okey, antay lang ako sa labas.

yaya: SIR, pasok na po! wala na ako PANTY!

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janjan · « **Reply #186 on:** August 19, 2009, 10:17:12 PM »

yaya at si SIR

si SIR: yaya, kaw ba yong nasa loob ng CR? kukunin ko lang toothbrush ko

yaya: sandali lang po! naka-panty lang ako.

si SIR: okey, antay lang ako sa labas.

yaya: SIR, pasok na po! wala na ako PANTY!

hahaha perti gud si yaya

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Raquelproud boholana · « **Reply #187 on:** August 20, 2009, 04:25:16 AM »

IF MY BODY WERE A CAR.... If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish, and my paint job is getting a little dull. But that's not the worst of it. My headlights are out of focus, and it's especially hard to see things up close. My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid and bump into things even in the best of weather. My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns inefficiently. But here's the worst of it -- Almost every time I sneeze, cough or laugh, either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires. CASH FOR CLUNKERS..........I QUALIFY - How about You?
Perti nakong qualifya ani.hehhehe

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Mulligan · « **Reply #188 on:** August 20, 2009, 01:34:34 PM »

Sign of wisdom kono nang mga wafu Ms. Raquel. Ang importante na bu-otan. Ako brother inlaw na kano murag wafu ra ba pud to. Pero mga guapo ang mga anak kay way talumtom sa panit. Pagka dako adto amo to epa artista diri sa Pinas. Hehe

Kana nga picture sa akong bana maot na heheheh pero gwapo ni siya in person ug naa pay jutay buhok sa atubangan.Di na siya photogenic picturan jud lahi ra,di gani na siya ganahan picturan kay upaw kono siya tan awon sa resulta ang ang kay pinaskin head man pud ug tupi.Sija ray mag awot awot sa iyang jutay na nga buhok.
Bol-anon kaajo nig kinaija very kind and generous ug prudent sa kwarta.

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=19195.0

bol-anon nga cebuano · « **Reply #189 on:** August 21, 2009, 12:04:04 AM »

Dawo

Si Pedro nakit-an ni Juan nga naghiwa ug pinya.

Juan: Uy, unsa man na pinya? hatagi ko beh?
Pedro: HatagI? diin man sa dihang nagtanum pa? Diin man ka sa dihang nag-antos ko ug padako ani?
Juan: Napriso ko, nakapatay ko ug dawo nga tawo.
Pedro: A mao ba? luyoa pug ka oi. O sige kuha na ari, naa pay kapayas didto. gusto ka kuhaan tika?

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Lollapalooza · « **Reply #190 on:** August 21, 2009, 12:07:31 AM »

isang kasabihan............

ayaw pagminaldita kung dili ka gwapa!!!

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #191 on:** August 21, 2009, 03:53:04 AM »

from BNC:
Dawo

Si Pedro nakit-an ni Juan nga naghiwa ug pinya.

Juan: Uy, unsa man na pinya? hatagi ko beh?
Pedro: HatagI? diin man sa dihang nagtanum pa? Diin man ka sa dihang nag-antos ko ug padako ani?
Juan: Napriso ko, nakapatay ko ug dawo nga tawo.
Pedro: A mao ba? luyoa pug ka oi. O sige kuha na ari, naa pay kapayas didto. gusto ka kuhaan tika?

bwahahahhaha! paita sad ana oi! hahahhaha!

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #192 on:** August 21, 2009, 03:55:14 AM »

IF MY BODY WERE A CAR.... If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish, and my paint job is getting a little dull. But that's not the worst of it. My headlights are out of focus, and it's especially hard to see things up close. My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid and bump into things even in the best of weather. My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns inefficiently. But here's the worst of it -- Almost every time I sneeze, cough or laugh, either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires. CASH FOR CLUNKERS..........I QUALIFY - How about You?
Perti nakong qualifya ani.hehhehe

hahahahhahha!

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david · « **Reply #193 on:** August 21, 2009, 04:18:37 AM »

hahahahhahahhah

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statesville · « **Reply #194 on:** August 21, 2009, 07:42:53 AM »

da, gaayo ka ug ikaw ang mahiwa imbis ang pinya
hahahaha!!!!

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bol-anon nga cebuano · « **Reply #195 on:** August 22, 2009, 12:44:42 AM »

goliat ug teban

goliat: noy teban, ngano man nang mga babaye sa india nga duna may pula nga dot sa ilang agtang?
teban: kuan man gud na goliat. nagtuo man gud na sila nga siopao ilang ulo maong gibutangan nila ug pula nga tuldok. ilhanan na kung asado ba ug bolabola.

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lindy · « **Reply #196 on:** August 22, 2009, 01:13:46 AM »

Asawa gipaak ug lamok:

Asawa: daghanang lamok oi! iyota ko hon be

Bana: unsay pagtuo nimo nako baygon!

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bol-anon nga cebuano · « **Reply #197 on:** August 22, 2009, 01:33:39 AM »

Asawa gipaak ug lamok:

Asawa: daghanang lamok oi! iyota ko hon be

Bana: unsay pagtuo nimo nako baygon!

revised version:

Asawa gipaak ug lamok:

Asawa: daghanang lamok oi! iyota ko hon be

Bana: unsay pagtuo nimo sa akong oten baygon katol kay makapatay ug lamok!

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lindy · « **Reply #198 on:** August 22, 2009, 03:01:14 AM »

hahaha mao diay na!

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david · « **Reply #199 on:** August 22, 2009, 03:08:19 AM »

hmmmmmmmmmm

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