Author Topic: Joke Time Again (Read 34175 times)

ms da binsi · « **Reply #40 on:** September 19, 2007, 11:12:37 AM »

dili photoshop...

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Happy · « **Reply #41 on:** September 19, 2007, 10:33:33 PM »

hahaha

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Barbaro · « **Reply #42 on:** September 20, 2007, 05:28:37 AM »

Usa ka lalake nangihi sa pader,
Ug kalit lang mikilat.
Nakasiagit ang lalake
Lalake: Ginoo koo.....
Ayaw intawon ipadevelop kay
PISOT PA KO.......

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willmerit · « **Reply #43 on:** September 20, 2007, 05:31:22 AM »

hahahhahahahha.

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Happy · « **Reply #44 on:** September 20, 2007, 05:46:23 AM »

haahaha

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willmerit · « **Reply #45 on:** September 20, 2007, 05:54:52 AM »

daghan pa ba?

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #46 on:** September 20, 2007, 06:45:31 AM »

hahahhahhahahha di basi mahadlok sha mapareha ni Dodong Insoy...

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hazel · « **Reply #47 on:** September 21, 2007, 06:50:09 PM »

hahahahahahaha

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willmerit · « **Reply #48 on:** September 23, 2007, 12:06:55 AM »

more jokes plzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

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Barbaro · « **Reply #49 on:** September 23, 2007, 08:08:04 PM »

dunay tulo ka lalaki, ilongo,boholano ug cebuano nagka amigohay sa manila, one night nagkasabot sila nga mag inom sa videoke bar bakas cla or chip in. sa kadaghan na nilag nahurot kay bakas man lagi nabantayan sa cebuano nga wala diay cyay kwarta nahabilin sa ila boarding haus. busa midiskarte siya;

cebuano : pustaanay ta nga naay pisot natong tulo ang pildi maoy mobayad sa ato giinom?
hilonggo : yatis ra abi kay hilonggo ko nagtoo kang pisot ko? cge sukol ko..
cebuano : ikaw bai ngadto sa boholano, sukol ka nga pustaanay ta nga naay pisot natong 3?
boholano : aw sukol oi, unsa man tan-aw ka?(dayong hana ug hubo)..
hilonggo: ayaw diri bai, adto ta 3 sa cr

tuod man nangadto ang tulo sa cr...

hilonggo : akoy una..dayong hubo o! tan-awa ninyo tan-awa pikas ako a tuli ko...
boholano : ako na pod! dayong hubo, o! tan-awa tuli pod ko....
cebuano : dayong hubo, o tan awa ninyo naay pisot natong tulo, o! tan-awa pisot ko, pildi mo kamo bayad ako giinom. hehehehehe....

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #50 on:** September 23, 2007, 11:41:18 PM »

hahahhahhahahha

hadlok dagway sija mo pang-it ug bajabas....

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Barbaro · « **Reply #51 on:** September 25, 2007, 07:28:58 PM »

May maestra nabiyaan na sa last trip para makauli sa ilaha mga 9 kms. from the town. Wa siyay laing nakit-an tartanilya na lang. Iya giistoryahan ang kutsero:

MAESTRA: Noy, puwede ba pahatod sa,..... iya ginganlan ila lugar.

KUTSERO: Dili na puwede maam gawas nga layo-layu wala pa gyud suga ako tartanilya.

MAESTRA: Sige lang gud Noy, wala gyud koy laing masakyan unsaon na lang kaha nako pag-uli sa amoa. Pangayo na lang bisan unsa imo pangayoon para lang gyud ko makauli.

Ang kutsero nga nakabati sa "bisan unsa nga pangayoon" mora'g nakurat kay batan-on pa si maam, lami pa jud lawas.

KUTSERO: Tinuod ka maam nga bisan unsa ako pangayoon?

MAESTRA: Tinuod lagi!!!!

KUTSERO: Unya ana ? maam...(misenyas ug mora ug nagtuslok ug calculator, kasabot na siguro mo unsay ipasabot ana nga senyas he he he)

MAESTRA: Sige na lang noy basta ihatod lagi usa ko

KUTSERO: Sige maam, kada utot sa akong kabayo, ana(senyas na pud)

MAESTRA: Sige na lagi kay mosamot ko kagabhian

SIRIT DAYON ANG KUTSERO PAGSAKAY SA MAESTRA, SIGE LATOS SA KABAYO PARA LANG GYUD MAKA-UTOT.Taud-taod, miutot na gyud:

KUTSERO IYA GIPAHUNONG ANG TARTANILLA: Maam nangutot na akong kabayo.

MAESTRA: Aw unsaon man mao man ato sabot, ngari na.

HUMAN SIRIT NA PUD ANG KUTSERO HALA LATOS PARA MAKA-UTOT NA PUD ANG KABAYO.Kautot na pud

KUTSERO: Kautot na pud maam

MAESTRA: Nagsabot naman ta ana, ngari na pud

Pagkahuman sa ika-4 ka utot, naka-upat gyud si manoy. Unya wala na molatos sa iya kabayo, sus naka-utot man gihapon. Wala na manumbaling ang kutsero,hangtod naka-utot na pud ug usab, wala gihapon manumbaling ang kutsero.Ang maestra nga nakabati sa mga UTOT sa kabayo mao nay mibuyag sa kutsero.

MAESTRA: Noy naka-utot na sab imo kabayo UY!

KUTSERO: Pasagdi nang kabayoa bisa'g magkalibang pa na......

He he he:lol: wa na diay molabtingaw ang kang manoy SURRENDER. Mga Sano, maayo gani kay dili makasulti ang kabayo no, kay kon makasulti pa moingon siguro ang kabayo:

Bossing, unsaon ta man na....AKO NA SAB nyahaaah.

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Barbaro · « **Reply #52 on:** September 27, 2007, 08:46:25 PM »

Lalake: Dong, mabaw ning suba?
Bata: Oo n! ong!
Lalake: (nilukso sa suba) Pisti tabang! Kalalum, ingon ka dong mabaw!
Bata: Mabaw bitaw nong nitabok gani ang itik ganina!

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #53 on:** September 27, 2007, 11:47:54 PM »

hahahhahhahahhahahhahah

pestol!!!

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slackware · « **Reply #54 on:** September 28, 2007, 01:05:07 AM »

Japanese Translation

Is this your property? Arimoto?
Yes, this is my property. Arikoto.
Is this yours? Sayobato?
This is mine. Sakinitu.
Can I have it? Akinato?
You can have it. Sayonato (sing.)
Can we have it? Saminato?
You can have it. Sanyonato (pl.)
You haven't washed your face. Mimutamatamo.
You've grown so thin! Kitanabutomo.
We saw each other. Kitakami.
We had a big get-together. Kitakita kami.
Have a drink before you go. Toma kamuna.
That was my assumption. Inakarako.
Let's go quickly! Bachi-na-yota!
We will boycott the election. Kami noboto.
Underarm odor. Kirikiripawa
Are you a victim of discrimination? Minamatakaba?
I give up. Sukonako.
Ouch! Haraiku!
What a sad life it is. Hainaku.
I'm going to leave you. Sawanako sayo.

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #55 on:** September 28, 2007, 03:05:40 AM »

hahhaahahhhaha i love it!!!

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Barbaro · « **Reply #56 on:** September 30, 2007, 03:55:26 PM »

PEDRO: puslan walay gamahal
maypa MAGPAKAMATAY!

ug c pedro ni dive sa SUBA

few minutes later.........

NITUNGHA ug nisulti: WAAAAAAHHHH!
dili ko kaginhawa.

MURA KO UG MAMATAY!

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #57 on:** October 01, 2007, 08:47:16 AM »

tuga2x hahahhhahhaha

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willmerit · « **Reply #58 on:** October 01, 2007, 09:57:47 AM »

Japanese Translation

Is this your property? Arimoto?
Yes, this is my property. Arikoto.
Is this yours? Sayobato?
This is mine. Sakinitu.
Can I have it? Akinato?
You can have it. Sayonato (sing.)
Can we have it? Saminato?
You can have it. Sanyonato (pl.)
You haven't washed your face. Mimutamatamo.
You've grown so thin! Kitanabutomo.
We saw each other. Kitakami.
We had a big get-together. Kitakita kami.
Have a drink before you go. Toma kamuna.
That was my assumption. Inakarako.
Let's go quickly! Bachi-na-yota!
We will boycott the election. Kami noboto.
Underarm odor. Kirikiripawa
Are you a victim of discrimination? Minamatakaba?
I give up. Sukonako.
Ouch! Haraiku!
What a sad life it is. Hainaku.
I'm going to leave you. Sawanako sayo.

very funny, i love it!

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Barbaro · « **Reply #59 on:** October 04, 2007, 01:36:32 AM »

MRS: HOY! nganong sige man kag basa og bolikat anang atong marriage contract diha?

MR: (ga hilom-hilom , wa magtagad, serious kaayo sa pagbasa)

MRS: ayyyyyyy! dile raba motagad ni.....unsa lagi imong gitan-aw?

MR: ayyy! day! ako gipangita ang EXPIRY DATE kung naa ba!

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hazel · « **Reply #60 on:** October 04, 2007, 01:48:50 AM »

hehehehehhe gikapoy na si mister...

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #61 on:** October 04, 2007, 05:56:16 AM »

hahhahahhahhahahhah

hala nindot!!!!!

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Barbaro · « **Reply #62 on:** October 04, 2007, 03:55:44 PM »

Chinese walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan
officer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to Taiwan on
business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.

The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security

for the loan, so the Chinese hands over the keys to a new Ferrari parked

on the street in front of the bank. He produces the title and everything

checks out.

The loan officer agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.
The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the
Chinese for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral against a $5,000
loan. An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari into the bank's
underground garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later, the Chinese returns, repays the $5,000 and the
interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Sir, we are
very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked
out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we
checked you out and found that you are a multi-millionaire. What puzzles

us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"

The Chinese replies: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for
two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"

Ah, the mind of the Chinese..

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hazel · « **Reply #63 on:** October 04, 2007, 03:59:00 PM »

hehehe wais!

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Happy · « **Reply #64 on:** October 04, 2007, 10:07:46 PM »

wais jud kaayo si chinese hehe

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bulak · « **Reply #65 on:** October 04, 2007, 10:11:29 PM »

hahahha mao secure pa kaayo iya Ferrari...clever!!!!

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #66 on:** October 04, 2007, 11:53:44 PM »

ka bright sa Chekwa!!!

hala i'll do that when i go to NY..

huy ang ilang parkingan didto no kay daghan nga floors,, ang car nila isakay ug elevator up to many floors..

it was amazing... kay abi naho ang elevator para ra sa mga tawo...

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willmerit · « **Reply #67 on:** October 06, 2007, 01:53:15 PM »

negosyante kaajo jud lagi.

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C2H4 · « **Reply #68 on:** October 06, 2007, 10:53:52 PM »

WALMART GREETER

A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into Wal-Mart with
her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

The Wal-Mart Greeter said pleasantly "Good morning, and welcome to
Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?"

The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, "Hell no they ain't."
"The oldest one's 9 and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think
they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?"

"I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am," replied the greeter. "I just
couldn't believe you got laid twice." "Have a good day and thank you for shopping
at Wal-Mart."

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Barbaro · « **Reply #69 on:** October 07, 2007, 10:07:14 AM »

Pa ngilngiggay gamit ug Samurai:
Indian: Waaah! Langaw patay!
Hapon: Wata! Langaw putol ulo!
Pinoy: wata ( Langaw milupad ghapon)
Hapon: Oi! Ngano lupad man ghapon na?
Pinoy: Aw patyon diay? Abe nako tuli-on lang!

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willmerit · « **Reply #70 on:** October 10, 2007, 05:51:54 AM »

hehehehheh

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C2H4 · « **Reply #71 on:** October 13, 2007, 01:48:27 PM »

10 year old blues

A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about the birds and the
bees.

"I don't want to know," the child said, bursting into tears. "Promise
me you
won't tell me."

Confused, the father asked what was wrong.

The boy sobbed, "When I was six, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny'
speech.

At seven, I got the 'There's no Tooth Fairy' speech.
When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no Santa' speech.
If you're going to tell me that grown-ups don't really get laid,
I'll
have nothing left to live for."

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C2H4 · « **Reply #72 on:** October 13, 2007, 01:55:35 PM »

Two doctors, a psychiatrist and a proctologist, opened an office in a small town and put up a sign reading: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors."

The town council was not happy with the sign, so the
doctors changed it to read, "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids."
This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to "Catatonics and High Colonics." No go.

Next, they tried "Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives." Thumbs down again. Then came "Minds and Behinds." Still no good.

Another attempt resulted in "Lost Souls and Butt Holes." Unacceptable again!

So they tried "Analysis and Anal Cysts." Not a chance. "Nuts and Butts?" No way.

"Freaks and Cheeks?" Still no go.

"Loons and Moons?" Forget it.
Almost at their wit's end, the doctors finally came up with: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Odds and Ends."

Everyone loved it.

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willmerit · « **Reply #73 on:** October 13, 2007, 02:36:10 PM »

ahahahaha

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Barbaro · « **Reply #74 on:** October 16, 2007, 03:16:59 PM »

Bata: pabili po ng ubas!
Tindero: wala kami ubas.
Next dayâ€¦
Bata: pabili po ng ubas!
Tindero: wala kami ubas.
Next dayâ€¦
Boy: mama pabili po ubas!
Tindero: wala nga kaming ubas! Isa pang beses magtanong ka iistepler ko
yang
bibig mo!
Next day uletâ€¦
Boy: may stapler po ba kayo?
Tindero: wala. Baket?
Boy: pabili nga po ng ubas! hehehe

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Barbaro · « **Reply #75 on:** October 18, 2007, 05:11:27 PM »

January 22 -Si Pacman nakadaug

...after 13 days...
February 4 - Nagka-stampede sa Ultra

...after 13 days...
February 17 - Landslide sa Southern Leyte

...after 13 days...
March 2 - Bakla si Rustom!!!

wahahahah

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Happy · « **Reply #76 on:** October 18, 2007, 05:49:50 PM »

hahaha wala na jud kay laing nakit-an Barbs? haha

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Barbaro · « **Reply #77 on:** October 20, 2007, 07:30:54 PM »

Asawa: Hon, bisan taas na imong edad, nakapaanak pa ka.
Bana: Super engine gud ni!!!
Asawa: Ipa check-up na.
Bana: Ngano man?
Asawa: Itom kaayong bata. Smoke belching ka!

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Happy · « **Reply #78 on:** October 21, 2007, 09:06:43 PM »

hahaha nasobrahan sa luto lol

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ms da binsi · « **Reply #79 on:** October 25, 2007, 05:03:13 AM »

Subject: Fw: Tagalog test - Let me see if you can read these.

BASAHIN ANG MGA SUMUSUNOD SA TAGALOG: (Malakas)

B, K, W, L, K, M, G, W, P, R, M, S, Y, T, W, K, H, H, H, T, W, P,
H, H, H, T, M, N, P, R, K, N, T, NGa!

Send this to others P, R, N, man, M, K, B, wi ka! H, H, H...

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Author Topic: Joke Time Again (Read 34175 times)

hazel

hazel

hazel