Author Topic: It's Joke Time Again (Read 29135 times)

Glen · « **Reply #200 on:** February 16, 2008, 03:56:58 PM »

Hahahaa hina si Bodyguard, pati si Erap!

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John · « **Reply #201 on:** February 16, 2008, 03:58:27 PM »

ha ha ha looya si erap

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lindy · « **Reply #202 on:** February 17, 2008, 01:51:00 AM »

ha ha ha looya si erap

John its hard to be famous gyud...

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Happy · « **Reply #203 on:** February 17, 2008, 02:45:38 AM »

How I wish my cute girl cat will do the same....Barbs

TALKING ANIMALS : (Elephant and Camel)

Elephant to the Camel: Sus.....mailahan na gjod nga nabali na ang kalibutan tungod sa Global Environmental Warming

Camel : Ngano man kahibalo ka man?

Elephant : Ikaw lay basihan. Ang imong "soso" na-a sa buko-buko!

Camel : Bitaw....sakto ka. Tan-awa ang imong "oten" na-a sa imong nawong!

ate sakit akong tiyan kinatawa

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

John · « **Reply #204 on:** February 17, 2008, 06:52:59 AM »

ha ha ha ha best example diaa ang ele ug si camel.

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Moyhua · « **Reply #205 on:** February 17, 2008, 06:55:34 AM »

TEACHER: give me a tag question.
PUPIL: My teacher is beautiful, isn't she?
TEACHER: Very good! Ibinisaya dong.
PUPIL: Ang akong maestra gwapa, wa sya kuyapi?

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

hazel · « **Reply #206 on:** February 18, 2008, 05:44:06 AM »

Erap: Lintek na ibon, iniputan ako!
Bodyguard: Sir, kukuha ako ng toilet paper.
Erap: Wag na! Paano mo pa mapupunasan ang pwet noon, nakalipad na! Tanga!

hahahhahahha

more!

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

jaja · « **Reply #207 on:** February 20, 2008, 04:55:09 PM »

A PINOY LAB STORY

Dang, a beautiful Filipina fell in love with Edong.

She planned to marry very soon. She was so happy about
her wedding
plans, she decided to tell her Tatay (dad).

Her Tatay told her, "Dang, you'll have to find
another. Your Nanay
(mom) does not know this, but Edong is your
half-brother" .

So Dang forgot about her Edong, and soon planned to
marry Ricardo.
But after telling tatay again, he said, "Dang, anak ko
(my child),
there's trouble still. You cannot marry Ricardo.
Please don't tell
your mother, but Ricardo and Edong are your
half-brothers. "

Dang had no choice but to go to her Nanay. Nanay
already knew and
said "Anak ko, do what makes you happy. Marry Ricardo
or marry
Edong, because you are not related to your Tatay."

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

jaja · « **Reply #208 on:** February 20, 2008, 04:57:21 PM »

Old AGE !.....

An older couple was lying in bed one night. The husband was falling a sleep, but the wife felt romantic and wanted to talk.

She said, "You use to hold my hand when we were courting."

Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second, and tried to get back to sleep. A few moments later she said, "Then you used to kiss me." Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.

Thirty seconds later she said. "Then you use to bite my neck. "Angrily, he threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed.

"Where are you going ?" she asked.

"To get my teeth!"

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

jaja · « **Reply #209 on:** February 20, 2008, 05:03:12 PM »

This is how it started:
Ako si Tiburcio Tampolano, isang Mechanical
Engineer sa Pilipinas.
Sa hirap maghanap ng trabaho sa panahon ngayon, pati pag se-salesman ng vacuum cleaner ay pinasok ko na.
Minsan, pumunta ako sa isang bahay sa isang
barangay. Kumatok ako sa pinto... Isang malaking
misis ang nagbukas sa akin. Pero bago
nakapagsalita ang babae, inunahan ko sya. mabilis
akong pumasok papunta sa sala nila para di na
makatanggi sa presentation ko.

Katulad ng utos ng boss ko, binuksan ko ang isang
plastic bag ng SM at ibinuhos lahat ng lamang tae
ng kalabaw sa carpet. This was a technique taught
to me in selling to get a massive and immediate
attention from the buyer.

Sabi ko sa kanya w/ confidence: "Misis, pag di
nalinis ng vacuum cleaner ko NGAYON ang mga
tae sa carpet niyo, kakainin ko isa-isa yan!", ang
mayabang na sinambit ko.

"Gusto mo ng ketsup para diyan?", tanong ng
babae. Sabi ko, "Bakit po?"

"Eh, kalilipat lang namin. wala pa kaming linya ng
kuryente."

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

svetlana · « **Reply #210 on:** February 20, 2008, 05:26:32 PM »

This is how it started:
Ako si Tiburcio Tampolano, isang Mechanical
Engineer sa Pilipinas.
Sa hirap maghanap ng trabaho sa panahon ngayon, pati pag se-salesman ng vacuum cleaner ay pinasok ko na.
Minsan, pumunta ako sa isang bahay sa isang
barangay. Kumatok ako sa pinto... Isang malaking
misis ang nagbukas sa akin. Pero bago
nakapagsalita ang babae, inunahan ko sya. mabilis
akong pumasok papunta sa sala nila para di na
makatanggi sa presentation ko.

Katulad ng utos ng boss ko, binuksan ko ang isang
plastic bag ng SM at ibinuhos lahat ng lamang tae
ng kalabaw sa carpet. This was a technique taught
to me in selling to get a massive and immediate
attention from the buyer.

Sabi ko sa kanya w/ confidence: "Misis, pag di
nalinis ng vacuum cleaner ko NGAYON ang mga
tae sa carpet niyo, kakainin ko isa-isa yan!", ang
mayabang na sinambit ko.

"Gusto mo ng ketsup para diyan?", tanong ng
babae. Sabi ko, "Bakit po?"

"Eh, kalilipat lang namin. wala pa kaming linya ng
kuryente."

wahahahahaha Tiburcio Bon appetit! hahaha

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Barbaro · « **Reply #211 on:** February 21, 2008, 03:04:43 AM »

Lolo: Pakiabot naman yang posporo.
Lola: Andyan naman yang kalan e!
Lolo: So ipanlilinis ko yang kalan ang tenga ko? Ganon ba ha? Ha?

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

hazel · « **Reply #212 on:** February 21, 2008, 05:40:04 AM »

hehehehehhe

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Happy · « **Reply #213 on:** February 21, 2008, 05:48:03 AM »

Lolo: Pakiabot naman yang posporo.
Lola: Andyan naman yang kalan e!
Lolo: So ipanlilinis ko yang kalan ang tenga ko? Ganon ba ha? Ha?

maarang kaha?!

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Lorenzo · « **Reply #214 on:** February 21, 2008, 05:51:17 AM »

A PINOY LAB STORY

Dang, a beautiful Filipina fell in love with Edong.

She planned to marry very soon. She was so happy about
her wedding
plans, she decided to tell her Tatay (dad).

Her Tatay told her, "Dang, you'll have to find
another. Your Nanay
(mom) does not know this, but Edong is your
half-brother" .

So Dang forgot about her Edong, and soon planned to
marry Ricardo.
But after telling tatay again, he said, "Dang, anak ko
(my child),
there's trouble still. You cannot marry Ricardo.
Please don't tell
your mother, but Ricardo and Edong are your
half-brothers. "

Dang had no choice but to go to her Nanay. Nanay
already knew and
said "Anak ko, do what makes you happy. Marry Ricardo
or marry
Edong, because you are not related to your Tatay."

Kuyawa pood na'ng nanay uy! Greatest secret of all man diay na.

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

lindy · « **Reply #215 on:** February 21, 2008, 12:14:43 PM »

Kuyawa pood na'ng nanay uy! Greatest secret of all man diay na.

nahatukma ni adtong apohan nga gipangutana ug iya bang apo iyahang kuyog... ug niingon nga dili siya sigurado kay ang iyang anak lalaki kon babaye pa kuno sigurado siya iyang apo...

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John · « **Reply #216 on:** February 22, 2008, 03:13:07 AM »

ha ha ha ha faita pod oi. nagduda diay sya nga pinangahoyan sa gawas, to make it sure magpa DNA test .

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

lindy · « **Reply #217 on:** February 22, 2008, 04:33:14 AM »

ha ha ha ha faita pod oi. nagduda diay sya nga pinangahoyan sa gawas, to make it sure magpa DNA test .

wla paman to sauna John...

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Moyhua · « **Reply #218 on:** February 22, 2008, 10:11:07 AM »

bana: love, promise sugod karon di na tika luiban. ako nang biyaan ang akong kabit
asawa: wow, tenk you love, ako sad promise, ang sunod natong anak, ikaw nay amahan. promise jud!

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Moyhua · « **Reply #219 on:** February 22, 2008, 10:11:59 AM »

BF: may malaki ako problema.
GF: wag mo sabihin problema MO lang, problema NATIN dahil nagmamahalan tayo.Ngayon ano problema natin?
BF: nabuntis NATIN si inday at TAYO ang ama.

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LanggamTamsi2 · « **Reply #220 on:** February 22, 2008, 11:35:36 AM »

<a href="http://www.friendster.com/photos/7942101/1/784918018"><img border="0" src="http://photos-101.friendster.com/e1/photos/10/12/7942101/1_784918018l.jpg"/></a>

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John · « **Reply #221 on:** February 23, 2008, 05:21:50 AM »

Ma-asawa:

Bana: Tab-ang kape, bugnaw ang kan-on, parat ang sabaw unsaon pagka gana nato ini mo kaon?
Asawa: reklamador ka pag-ajo, ako ka gabii may reklamo ba? nga parat ang imong itlog?

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John · « **Reply #222 on:** February 23, 2008, 05:28:50 AM »

Bagong kasal;

Mrs. Ano ba? two days na tayong kasal wala parin
Mr. Kasi pagod ako
Mrs: Sige ka pag-ayaw mo mag-hanap ako ng lalaki
Mr. Sige ikaw? gawin mo dalawa para tig-isa tayo.

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Bambi · « **Reply #223 on:** February 23, 2008, 05:33:11 AM »

Ma-asawa:

Bana: Tab-ang kape, bugnaw ang kan-on, parat ang sabaw unsaon pagka gana nato ini mo kaon?
Asawa: reklamador ka pag-ajo, ako ka gabii may reklamo ba? nga parat ang imong itlog?

whahahaa basin sa singgot unja wa pod una mag shower....... mirisi kay ning-tilap

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Happy · « **Reply #224 on:** February 23, 2008, 05:36:40 AM »

Bagong kasal;

Mrs. Ano ba? two days na tayong kasal wala parin
Mr. Kasi pagod ako
Mrs: Sige ka pag-ayaw mo mag-hanap ako ng lalaki
Mr. Sige ikaw? gawin mo dalawa para tig-isa tayo.

haha lalakwe pud diay iya gusto

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

lindy · « **Reply #225 on:** February 23, 2008, 05:39:52 AM »

whahahaa basin sa singgot unja wa pod una mag shower....... mirisi kay ning-tilap

hahahahaha asa pa kahunahuna kon naglami na...

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John · « **Reply #226 on:** February 23, 2008, 05:46:50 AM »

Duha ka madre; gina rape.

Madre 1: Dyosko patawarin po sila hindi nila alam ang kanilang ginagawa.

Madre 2: Ahh yong sa akin marunong po sila.

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LanggamTamsi2 · « **Reply #227 on:** February 23, 2008, 07:45:38 AM »

hahahaha very funny.

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Barbaro · « **Reply #228 on:** March 01, 2008, 01:34:14 AM »

3 surgeons trying to impress each other's skill:
Dok 1: I operated the arm of this guy and he's now a famous
basketball star.
Dok 2: I operated the leg of this guy and now he's a famous
marathon runner!
Doc 3: That's nothing. I put a mole on the face of this s*** idiot
and now she's the PRESIDENT!!

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

svetlana · « **Reply #229 on:** March 01, 2008, 09:09:21 AM »

3 surgeons trying to impress each other's skill:
Dok 1: I operated the arm of this guy and he's now a famous
basketball star.
Dok 2: I operated the leg of this guy and now he's a famous
marathon runner!
Doc 3: That's nothing. I put a mole on the face of this s*** idiot
and now she's the PRESIDENT!!

hahahahahaha

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Barbaro · « **Reply #230 on:** March 01, 2008, 05:51:05 PM »

Abalos's Prayer:
ZTE father, who are in China, hakot be thy name, thy kickback
come, thy wealth be done, in Wack-Wack as it is in Comelec.
Give me this day my daily bribe, and conceal all my sins, as I
conceal those sin along with me, and if I am led into temptation,
deliver me from criticism, its power, and its money forever and
ever. Amen.

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Bambi · « **Reply #231 on:** March 02, 2008, 03:09:24 AM »

3 surgeons trying to impress each other's skill:
Dok 1: I operated the arm of this guy and he's now a famous
basketball star.
Dok 2: I operated the leg of this guy and now he's a famous
marathon runner!

Whahahahaha! Very funny Barbaro.....hope she will get the time to browse this thread.
Doc 3: That's nothing. I put a mole on the face of this s*** idiot
and now she's the PRESIDENT!!

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Barbaro · « **Reply #232 on:** March 02, 2008, 11:00:11 PM »

Sa Umpisa ang tawag sa taong walang hiya:
--MAKAPAL
Nung lumala ay naging
--GARAPAL
Ngayon malubha na. Ang tawag:
--MAKAPAGAL!

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hazel · « **Reply #233 on:** March 02, 2008, 11:07:03 PM »

Sa Umpisa ang tawag sa taong walang hiya:
--MAKAPAL
Nung lumala ay naging
--GARAPAL
Ngayon malubha na. Ang tawag:
--MAKAPAGAL!

hahahhahahaha

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Happy · « **Reply #234 on:** March 03, 2008, 03:31:20 AM »

hala ka Barbs, pangita nalang daan ug kataguan diha

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svetlana · « **Reply #235 on:** March 03, 2008, 04:05:23 PM »

Dear Dodong,

Sa susunod anak, Nido non-fat na lang ang ipadala mo sa tatang mo.

Nasisira kasi ang tiyan niya sa pinadala mong Nivea Moisturing Milk.

Nagmamahal,
Nanay

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Barbaro · « **Reply #236 on:** March 03, 2008, 10:53:36 PM »

3 girls paalam sa erpats:
Girl 1: Dad, am going out with PETE to EAT
Girl 2: I'm going out with LANCE to DANCE
Girl 3: I'm going out with REX....
Dad: Ah hinde! Dito ka lang!!!

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Happy · « **Reply #237 on:** March 04, 2008, 02:47:46 AM »

Dear Dodong,

Sa susunod anak, Nido non-fat na lang ang ipadala mo sa tatang mo.

Nasisira kasi ang tiyan niya sa pinadala mong Nivea Moisturing Milk.

Nagmamahal,
Nanay

San man si tatay wala man basaha kung para asa tong gatasa to

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Barbaro · « **Reply #238 on:** March 04, 2008, 07:03:38 PM »

Walang matinong lalake sa malanding babae"
mali....
Eto dapat
"Walang malanding babae kung matino ang lalake."

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Happy · « **Reply #239 on:** March 05, 2008, 07:25:42 AM »

Kabawos pud

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Barbaro · « **Reply #240 on:** March 06, 2008, 08:03:37 PM »

Chinese feng shui: If MIRROR at the stairs, may swelte at grasya
akyat. If MIRROR at the door, may swelte at grasya pasok.
If MIRROR at the ceiling, ikaw swelte, nasa loob ka ng MOTEL!

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Scarb · « **Reply #241 on:** March 09, 2008, 03:56:20 AM »

Sa Umpisa ang tawag sa taong walang hiya:
--MAKAPAL
Nung lumala ay naging
--GARAPAL
Ngayon malubha na. Ang tawag:
--MAKAPAGAL!

Barbs baby huuh maau jud ka mopagaray-garay bah!

salamat sa pagpakatawa

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Barbaro · « **Reply #242 on:** March 09, 2008, 12:48:10 PM »

Nanay: Papauwi ka na ba? Asan ka na?
Anak: Andito po ako sa ospital...
Nanay (umiiyak): Ha? Ano nangyari sayo?!
Anak: Nay, nurse po ako, duty ako ngayon!

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Brownman · « **Reply #243 on:** March 09, 2008, 01:13:47 PM »

basin gui ango ango na Barbs ijang mader, he, he

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svetlana · « **Reply #244 on:** March 09, 2008, 06:15:44 PM »

Nanay: Papauwi ka na ba? Asan ka na?
Anak: Andito po ako sa ospital...
Nanay (umiiyak): Ha? Ano nangyari sayo?!
Anak: Nay, nurse po ako, duty ako ngayon!

wahahahaha pastilan si Nanay nakalimot nga nurse ijang anak!

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

swakee · « **Reply #245 on:** March 10, 2008, 01:49:03 PM »

toinkz! si nanay naay 3 mins memory lapsed...

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pioneer · « **Reply #246 on:** March 10, 2008, 01:59:43 PM »

Friends, one joke, one thread.

This thread is locked as it is too long already. Our visitors would get lost following all the jokes in a single thread.

Preference: One joke, one thread.

Linkback: https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/index.php?topic=3344.0

Author Topic: It's Joke Time Again (Read 29135 times)

hazel

hazel

hazel