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Boudreaux and Thibodeaux, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking dem bud-lite.

Boudreaux turns to Thibodeaux and says, 'You know me, I'm tired of going tru life without dat education.  Tomorrow me I'm goin to dat Community College and sign me up for some classes.'

Thibodeaux thinks it's a good idea and the two have another bud-lite.

The next day, Boudreaux goes down to the college and meets Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic.

'Logic?' Boudreaux says. 'What's dat Hun?'

The dean says, 'I'll give you an example.  Do you own a weed eater?'

'Yeah.'

'Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I think that you would have a yard.'

'Dat's right, I do have a yard.'

'I'm not done,' the dean says.

'Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house.'

'Mais Yeh, I got me a house dare.'

'And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family.'

'Mais Yeh dats right too, I have a family.

'I'm not done yet.  

Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife.  

And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a heterosexual.'

'I am a heterosexual. Dat's amazing, you were able to find all dat out because I got DA weed eater.'

Excited to take the class now, Boudreaux shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Thibodeaux at the bar.  

He tells Thibodeaux about his classes, how he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic.

'Logic?  ' Thibodeaux says, 'What's dat?'

Boudreaux says, 'I'll give you an example.  Do you have a weed eater?'

'No.'

'Den you're a queer.'  


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Boudreaux was turning 75 and was overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet.

The doctor said, "I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least 5 pounds.

When Boudreaux returned, he shocked the doctor by having lost nearly 60 lbs!

"Wow, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?"

Boudreaux nodded, "I'll tell you though, I thought I wuz gonna drop dead on dat 3rd day."

"From the hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.

Hell no, it wuz from all dat damn skippin! 




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BOUDREAUX DECLARES WAR ON OBAMA

President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang.

"Hello, President Obama " a heavily accented southern voice said. "This is Boudreaux, down here at the Joe's Crab Shack, Acadia Parish, Louisiana. I am callin' to tell y’all dat we are officially declaring war on ya!"   

"Well Boudreaux," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news!  How big is your army?"
 
"Right now," said Boudreaux, after a moments calculation "there is myself, my cousin Pierre, my next-door-neighbor Francois, and the whole Evangeline hunt club. That makes eleven!"   

Barack paused. "I must tell you Boudreaux that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."   

"No for sure!" said Boudreaux. "I'll have ta call back at ya!"

Sure enough, the next day, Boudreaux called again.

"Mr. Obama, the war is still on! We have done acquire some infantry equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be Boudreaux?" Barack asked. 

"Well cher, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Francois's farm tractor."

President Obama sighed. "I must tell you, Boudreaux, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."   

"Lord above", said Boudreaux, "I'll for sure be getting back to ya."   

Sure enough, Boudreaux rang again the next day.

"President Obama, the war is still on! We have done managed to go git ourselves airborne! We for sure up an' modified Pierre's ultra-light with a jess a few shotgun in the cockpit, and four boys from the Legion have done come and joined us as well!"

Barack was silent for a minute then cleared his throat. "I must tell you Boudreaux that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes.  My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

"Oh Lord," said Boudreaux, "for sure I'll have to call back at you."   

Sure enough, Boudreaux called again the next day.

"President Obama ! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have done had to call off dat war what we was talking bout."   

"I'm not surprised to hear that" said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"   

Well, cher," said Boudreaux, "we've all done sat down and had a long chat over some crawfish and beers, and we done come to realize that there's just no way we can feed two million prisoners." 

COONASS CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN




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Thibodeaux was driving down the road one day when he saw a beautiful woman standing in the middle of it. Thibodeaux hit the brakes and asked the woman, "What's wrong Miss?"

The lady explained, "My life is over. Nobody cares about me. I want it all to end, so I'm just praying that someone will run over me on this road."

Thibodeaux begged her, "No Miss. Please don't do that. You are beautiful, obviously smart, and you have a full life ahead of you. I'll tell you what. Jump in my truck and I will sneak you onto the boat I am working on. We are heading to France, so you can hide during the journey and we will slip off together in Europe and live a wonderful life."

The lady agreed, and Thibodeaux snuck her onto the boat as promised. For over three weeks, he fed her three meals a day, brought her water, and romanced her in the life boat after the crew went to bed.

Eventually, the captain of the ship caught the lady and asked her, "Miss, why are you hiding down in that cabin?"

The lady explained, "I'm so sorry. One of your crew, Thibodeaux, has been hiding me here, feeding me, and romancing me at night on this whole journey to France."

The captain giggled and told her, "No, no. We're not on our way to France. This is just the Chalmette ferry!"




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Boudreaux was lying on his death bed. The doctor had already told him that he surely wouldn't live for another week. Suddenly,
and much to Boudreaux's glee, a wonderful aroma hit Boudreaux like a tidal wave. He knew that the smell meant only one thing -
his wife had just made a pot of gumbo.

Boudreaux wanted a bowl so badly, but he was no longer able to walk, so he crawled out of his bed and into the kitchen.
Just as Boudreaux was reaching for the pot, his wife barked out, "Boudreaux! Shame on you! You know that gumbo is going to be for the funeral." 


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Quibodeaux, Thibodeaux and Boudreaux were sitting in a boat on a very cloudy day fishing. They had been fishing a good while when the sky suddenly opened up just above them and a ray of light shined down directly on the front of the boat. It spooked them and they started to get nervous. All of a sudden, they heard a voice from up above. "This is the Lord."

They all looked at one another and begin saying, "I didn't do nothing, I didn't do nothing, I didn't do nothing."

The Lord said, "Don't get nervous. I'm not here to pass judgment on you, I only want to grant each of you one healing wish."

They all calmed down and Quibodeaux stood up in the boat. "As you already know Lord, I've been having this crick in the back of my neck for the past ten years and if you were to grant me a healing wish, that would be it."

The Lord waved his hand and Quibodeaux started moving his neck freely.

"Mais, that feels good. Thank you Lord, thank you," and he sat down.

Thibodeaux stood up next. "You know Lord, that bum leg I've been having for the past fifteen years, you know how bad I limp, if you were to grant me one wish, that would be it."

The Lord waved his hand and Thibodeaux immediately felt the limp leave his leg. "Oh thank you Lord, oh thank you, thank you."

Before Thibodeaux could sit down, there was a big splash behind the boat. Both Quibodeaux and Thibodeaux looked behind themselves and see Boudreaux swimming away from the boat as fast as he could. Thibodeaux shouted, "Boudreaux, where you going? The Lord is not here to pass judgment on you, he's here to grant you a healing wish. You know that bad back of yours, he can heal it for you right here and now."

Boudreaux hollered back, not missing a swim stride, "No, no, I don't want the Lord to heal me, I'll lose my disability check.

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One day, Boudreaux and Clotile were riding their boat at Bayou Benoit when they hit a sunken log and the boat overturned. Clotile didn't have a life jacket on, and she drowned. The sheriff and a bunch of neighbors came by to try to find her, but they didn't have any luck. A week passed and Thibodeaux knocked on Boudreaux's front door.

"Boudreaux, I have some good news and some bad news for you."

"Give me the bad news first."

"Well, the bad news is that we found Clotile. She drowned. We so sorry for you."

"Well go on, what is the good news?"

"The good new is... when we pull her up, we fill two sacks of big blue point crab."

"Mais, where you put her body?"

"Well, Boudreaux. De first time we did so good with the crabs, we decided to leave her in the water one more day." 



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paapila si bourdeaux dinhi sa tb fr chic, bi.  haraw silingan unta mo.  angayan gyod siya dinhi.

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Two Cajun boys called Pierre and Boudreaux found themselves out of a job when the underwear factory in Port Barre shut down.
So their boss said they should go to the Louisiana State Unemployment Office (LSU) to get some money from the State while they were looking for work. So Pierre and Boudreaux went to the LSU office.

Boudreaux was interviewed first.

"What was your former occupation?" asked the Unemployment lady.

"Me, I was a crotch stitcher. I specialised in ladies underpants," Boudreaux replied proudly.

The lady looked it up in her big book and said, "OK, you're eligible for $50 a week."

"You mean I don't gotta do nothin' and I kin get $50 a week. Man, dats betta den crawfishin'!" Boudreaux exclaimed.

The lady ignored him and asked Pierre the same question.

Pierre looked her straight in the eye and said, "I was one a dem diesel fitters."

She looked it up in her big book again and said: "OK then, you're eligible for $200 a week in unemployment benefits."

"Wait a minute!" Boudreaux shouted. "Mais, how come Pierre gets $200 a week, and me, I only get fifty bucks? I tole you I used to be a crotch stitcher; you know you gotta be real good to do dat kind of work so de seams are all nice an straight an smooth so nutting scratches de lady. An Pierre here, he's only a diesel fitter. And he's gonna make at least twice more dan me?!"

"Oh," the replied the lady, "but he's a skilled labourer with an education. Diesel fitters are in high demand, especially by oil companies. There's not many diesel specialists around."

"Whoa, whoa, lady," Boudreaux continued, "you got dat all wrong. Yeah, Pierre's a diesel fitter, all right. But what dat means is dat after I do all de fine work on de lady drawers, he picks dem up, looks 'em over and stretches dem dis way and dat, and den says,
'Yep, dees’ll fit her!'" 



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Here's how a Cajun sounds...


New Orleans Cajun, Justin Wilson - Boys First Hunt

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hahaha. oh very interesting. fr. roel, i have a friend who lives downstairs of my apartment building. she has a very thick bayou accent.

cute na cute. 

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Boudreaux bought his wife Marie a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, Fontenot inquired how she was doing with it.

"Oh," said Boudreaux, "I persuaded her to switch to a clarinet."

"How come?," asked Fontenot.

"Well," Boudreaux answered, "because with a clarinet she can't sing." 


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Boudreaux is so cheap that after his airplane landed safely he grumbled, "Well, der goes five dollars down da drain for dat flight insurance!" 


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The judge had just awarded a divorce to Boudreaux’s wife, who had charged non-support. He said to Boudreaux, "I have decided to give your wife $400 a month for support."

"Well, dat's fine, Judge," said Boudreaux. "And once in a while I'll try to chip in a few bucks, myself." 

 


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Clarence, a Cajun from New Iberia walked into a bank in New York City and asked for the loan officer. He told the loan officer that he was going to Paris for an International Cajun Festival for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000 and that he was not a depositor of the bank.

The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan, so the Clarence handed over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car was parked on the street in front of the bank. Clarence produced the title and everything checked out. The loan officer agreed to hold the car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest.

Later, the bank's president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the Cajun from the south for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral for a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the bank's private underground garage and parked it.

Two weeks later, the Clarence returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest of $23.07.

The loan officer said, 'Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out on Dun & Bradstreet and found that you are a distinguished alumnus of the University of Louisiana-Lafayette, a highly sophisticated investor and multi-millionaire with real estate and financial interests all over the world, and that your investments include a large number of wind turbines around Sweetwater, Texas. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?

Clarence replied, "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return?" 



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Three College Cajuns

Three Cajuns go down to Mexico to celebrate college graduation. They get drunk, and wake up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed in the morning, though none of them can remember what they did the night before.

The first one, Henri, is strapped in the electric chair, and is asked if he has any last words. He says, "I just graduated from Nichols State in Thibodaux, Louisiana and believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on the behalf of the innocent."

They throw the switch and nothing happens. They all immediately fall to the floor on their knees; beg for Henri’s forgiveness, and release him.

The second, Gaston, is strapped in and gives his last words, "I just graduated from McNeese State in Lake Charles, Louisiana and I believe in the power of justice to intervene on the part of the innocent."

They throw the switch and, again, nothing happens. Again, they all immediately fall to their knees; beg for his forgiveness, and release him.

The last one, Boudreaux, is strapped in and he says, "Well, den, I'm from the University of Louisiana in Lafayette and I just graduated wit ma degree in Electrical Engineering, and I'll tell you right now, you ain't gonna electrocute nobody if you don't plug this ting in."

 


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The actual sound of a Cajun man... this is my friend Rey telling Cajun jokes yesterday before the Stations of the Cross

Cajun Rey - Part 1 of 2

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paskang... hahaha!  butdan man sad kog tijan ani.  naa pod diay morag bol-anon ug sense of humor diha...

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Cajun Ray buying sweet for his wife 


St. Genevieve Men's Club â—‹ Lenten Fish Fry 2011

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