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General Topic / Proof That The World Is Nuts
« on: July 13, 2008, 09:26:37 AM »
In Lebanon , men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death. (Like THAT makes sense.)

In Bahrain , a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.

(Do they look different reversed?)

Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

(A brick?)

The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation. (Much worse than 'going blind!')

There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside And deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time. Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.

(Let's just think for a minute; is there Any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?) 

In Hong Kong , a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.

(Ah! Justice!)

Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool , England - but only in tropical fish stores. (But of course!)

In Cali , Colombia , a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.

(Makes one shudder at the thought.)

In Santa Cruz , Bolivia , it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.

(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

In Maryland , it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only 'in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises.'

(Is this a great country or what? Well, not as great as Guam !)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Who volunteers for this stuff?)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)

The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (From drinking little bottles of???)

(Did the government pay for this research??)

Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Ah, geez.)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)

Starfish don't have brains.

(I know some people like that, too.)

And, the best for last?

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

(And I thought I had bad Breath in the morning!)

General Topic / Just Stay
« on: July 13, 2008, 09:23:54 AM »
A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside.

'Your son is here,' she said to the old man.

She had to repeat the words several times before the patient's eyes opened.

He was heavily sedated because of the pain of his heart attack, he dimly saw the young uniformed Marine standing outside the oxygen tent. He reached out his hand. The Marine wrapped his toughened fingers around the old man's limp ones, squeezing a message of love and encouragement.

The nurse brought a chair so that the Marine could sit beside the bed.A ll through the night the young Marine sat there in the poorly lighted ward, holding the old man's hand and offering him words of love and strength. Occasionally, the nurse suggested that the Marine move away and rest awhile.
He refused. Whenever the nurse came into the ward, the Marine was oblivious of her and of the night noises of the hospital - the clanking of the oxygen tank, the laughter of the night staff members exchanging greetings, the cries and moans of the other patients.

Now and then she heard him say a few gentle words. The dying man said nothing, only held tightly to his son all through the night.

Along towards dawn, the old man died. The Marine released the now lifeless hand he had been holding and went to tell the nurse. While she did what she had to do, he waited.

Finally, she returned. She started to offer words of sympathy, but the Marine interrupted her.

'Who was that man?' he asked.
The nurse was startled, 'He was your father,' she answered.
'No, he wasn't,' the Marine replied. 'I never saw him before in my life.'

'Then why didn't you say something when I took you to him?'

'I knew right away there had been a mistake,
but I also knew he needed his son, and his
son just wasn't here.
When I realized that he was too sick to tell
whether or not I was his son,
knowing how much he needed me, I stayed.'

The next time someone needs you ... just be there. Stay.

Youtube Replay / Scary Landlord
« on: June 12, 2008, 01:03:10 AM »

Youtube Replay / Say It Again
« on: May 26, 2008, 04:04:05 PM »

Youtube Replay / He's Such A Cutie Pie!
« on: May 02, 2008, 08:05:07 AM »
To apologize for making you guys cry on that vid of Madonna Decena, here's a vid of Charlie Green, a 10-yr old half-Pinoy half-British boy wonder. I hope this makes you all smile.  :)

Youtube Replay / I Was Moved To Tears
« on: May 01, 2008, 10:38:44 AM »
This performance made me cry. But through the tears, I felt immense pride. Filipino talent and the beauty of the Filipino gyud!

Youtube Replay / WordPlay
« on: April 22, 2008, 09:00:22 AM »

Youtube Replay / Geek In The Pink!
« on: April 22, 2008, 08:59:25 AM »

Youtube Replay / Have You Ever?
« on: February 23, 2008, 11:44:15 AM »

Youtube Replay / Never Had A Dream Come True
« on: February 23, 2008, 11:39:03 AM »

Youtube Replay / Have You Ever Been In Love?
« on: February 23, 2008, 11:27:28 AM »

Youtube Replay / I Surrender
« on: February 23, 2008, 10:03:23 AM »

Youtube Replay / Moments Like This
« on: February 23, 2008, 09:37:44 AM »
When tears flow and words escape me. *wow*

Music and Video / This is Why I Love Him
« on: February 20, 2008, 12:48:57 PM »
I was watching American Idol earlier, and was quietly disappointed when I realized, as talented as the singers were, there will never be another one quite as good as Elliott Yamin. *sigh*

Showbiz & Celebrity / Gorgeous Pinay Celebs
« on: December 08, 2007, 08:38:24 AM »
Claudine Barretto (she's even prettier now that she's a mom)

6kh0k2h - Show Posts - C2H4

Jokes and Humor / Why, Why, Why
« on: November 25, 2007, 02:27:00 AM »
Why Do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use, the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE......
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.


Jokes and Humor / WOMEN
« on: November 25, 2007, 02:22:19 AM »
A woman & a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, Monday morning. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. God works in Mysterious ways.

After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man.That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days".

Flattered, the man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely, this must be a sign from God!"

The woman continues, "And look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break.
Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune."

Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it
back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap
back on, and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police...."

Women are clever, evil bitches. Don't mess with them.

Jokes and Humor / DIVORCE Vs. MURDER
« on: November 25, 2007, 01:45:12 AM »
A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy,  walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide."
      The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"
      The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband."
      The pharmacist's eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have  mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband.
      That's against the law! I'll lose my license! They'll throw both of us  in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely
      You CANNOT have any cyanide!"
      The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of  her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
      The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now, that's different. You didn't tell me you had a prescription!"

Fashion Trend / The Power of Makeup
« on: November 17, 2007, 05:30:54 AM »
The colors are awesome!

Fashion Trend / Smoky Eye Tutorial
« on: November 17, 2007, 05:07:28 AM »
This is my biggest frustration. I can't do a proper smoky eye!

Let's watch and learn.

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