Author Topic: Facts that Women should know from Men  (Read 2895 times)

Gener

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Facts that Women should know from Men
« on: December 01, 2008, 08:39:55 PM »
I have come to a few clear conclusions about the sometimes hard-to-believe but still lovable world of men. Want details? Here's a peek into our private minds. Although some of these truths may not be pretty, they'll help you understand any man in your life.

WE can't resist the tease
There's no sexier surprise for us than when you dance seductively, slowly undress or wear lacy underwear — anything that stimulates us visually. This sexual tension drives us wild, because our mind races, imagining what's coming next. Feel shy dancing around in your bra? You should know that we don't notice your so-called flaws when you're turning us on. In this situation, we have a one-track mind, and it stays focused on how hot you are. So the next time you undress, take it slow. Toss your clothes to your man as you go. That's all it takes to drive us nuts — in a good way.

WE can't help but stare at other women
It's true: We just can't control ourselves. The same way when you walk by a window filled with gorgeous shoes — you have to look. It's anthropological; if you look at the mating habits of gorillas, even if they're "pair bonded", most males cruise the females and stare when a cute gorilla girl walks by. Guy's are not insensitive, we’ve just been momentarily possessed by our inner ape.

WE are big kids (and proud of it)
Deep down, all men are big  boys. (This explains why so many grown men wear baseball caps.) Our interests are boy-like, too. Take for example our obsession with sports. Most men love anything that involves kicking something, throwing things, or punching other men. Sound like 10-year-olds on the playground to you?  When you put three or more men together, we bond by yelling at the TV and being idiots to each other. Regressing into childlike behavior isn't just a means of amusing ourselves — it's our way of escaping real-life pressures and feeling accepted as we are. There's no point in denying us time to release our juvenile side. Just be glad we're doing it during boys' night out and not in front of your girlfriends or family!

WE are perverts
There's no getting around it: Guys are pervs. We think about sex 24/7. And sometimes we daydream about — and look at pictures of — gross stuff or weird moves, moves that we'd never try in a million years. Fact is, men have a higher tolerance for body fluids and outrageous sex acts than you do (it's something about that 10-year-old boy inside each of us — see above). And it's a fact that men's sexual fantasies contain more people than you do. For the guy who has everything, try to give your man the gift of porn. It's the one present men never complain about (or return). But if you can't stand the thought of these films, then don't go there. Nothing is less sexy to a man than a woman who's uncomfortable. Guys may be turned on by the visuals in porn, but trust me, we'd rather have the real, in-the-flesh deal anytime.

WE would love to cheat
That doesn't mean we will, though. Luckily, we're either too guilty, too shy or too scared. Hey, it's biology: We see, we want, we fantasize. Men are not by nature monogamous animals, and we often have to fight our sexual urges, which many do very successfully. If a guy could live his perfect fantasy life, he would have a wife and a new fling whenever he felt like it. (While women look for that one "special" guy, men look for those five "special" girls.) Fifty percent of men say that if there were zero percent chance you'd find out, they'd cheat. But that also means 50 percent wouldn't — even if there were no danger of getting caught. Many men say that when they've had the idea, they nix it because they wouldn't want to mess up the good thing they've got at home.

WE love to boost our ego
Every man has a bit of Hercules in him. We want you to think we're strong, successful, and sexy. Most men would never admit this, but men like to think they're slightly smarter than the woman they're with. Yet we have no problem with the woman being 10 times better-looking than us (that strokes our ego even more). Ultimately, we settle for just being able to do one thing better than you. I think it's because, privately, we think we're the superior sex.

WE love oral s_ _
What do men want more of in bed? Of the ten men I asked (including myself) that question, 80 percent of us said, "More oral sex." Specifically, we wanted to be on the receiving end. Why do we love it so much? We don't have to worry about technique, and you do all the work (sometimes we're kinda lazy). Guys say the best treat a woman can give is oral sex in the morning; in the same way you love the idea of breakfast in bed.

WE don't take hints
When men are with other men, we don't tiptoe around each other and drop subtle suggestions. That's because hints don't register with us. While you pride yourselves on being able to know intuitively what your friends, husbands, and kids are thinking, but we have no interest in reading minds. That's why, "If you don't ask, you don't get." In relationships, don't expect a guy to know exactly what you want — and whenever you do, you will be disappointed. If, for example, you want your guy to take you out for your birthday, you're wasting your time dropping hints like "Guess what day Friday is? It's someone's birthday!" If you do that, you'll be 80 before he takes you out.

WE love our p_ _ _s
Man’s best friend is actually not a dog but our penis. And we assume it's your best friend, too. After all, like a dog, it's always happy to see you, enjoys being petted, and often rubs itself against your legs. And have you noticed that guys are so intimate with our ‘members’ that we often create pet names for them, including ‘Junior’, ‘Manoy’ and the ever-so-subtle ‘Jun-jun’?

While you have internal, squishy accommodations, we are equipped with external, throbbing reminders of the biological imperative to "spread the seed." Every time we look down at our tools standing at attention, we remember that our penises are there for a reason — to conquer the planet. That's why we've built so many monuments in the penis's likeness- from the Eiffel Tower to the Empire State Building.

Women don't make a big deal about what you have going on downstairs because you're too busy worrying about the size and shape of your other body parts. But we are obsessed with size. Every time I have a drinking session with my barkada, it’s a common for a man (when the spirit of san miguel beer sinks in) to boast the size of his ‘Jun-jun’. Some may claim it as ‘ocho-de-ligo’ (about the diameter of a ligo sardines can and 8 inches long), "There's my size!" Would you believe us? No, because when men pull out the ruler — we almost always round up. If you ask a dozen men what the average length of an erect penis is, they'll say eight inches. But if you ask a dozen women, you'll say it's four inches. Bottom line: No matter how small it is, tell your man it's huge. If it's really too big, tell him just that. Trust me — he'll take it as a compliment.

WE don't get Valentine's Day.
Most guys consider February 14 a "chick holiday." And it stresses us: We don't know what's expected, what we should buy, and how much (or how little) we should express our feelings. It’s not that we're not incapable of romance, we just hate being romantic on cue. Just tell us, "V-Day is Friday. Let's go out for dinner." If you remind us when it is and let us off the hook for some of the standard requirements, we’ll more likely to deliver some creative romance of our own.


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hofelina

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Re: Facts that Women should know from Men
« Reply #1 on: December 03, 2008, 07:21:25 AM »
Gener,

Ngayon ko lang nabasa ito!  Wag kang mag-alala, itong mga sinulat mo ay hindi na bago.  Na ang lalaki ay madaling matuliro, permanente yan. Pag sex ang napapag-usapan, ang lahat ng laman ng utak ay bumaba sa inyong .....

At 3 bagay ang hindi nawawala sa focus; auto, computer at female breasts, it can be in different order.

Manay

ps
This posting is a great answer why priest are not allowed to marry.

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Gener

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Re: Facts that Women should know from Men
« Reply #2 on: December 10, 2008, 03:38:28 PM »
manay tess, dagdag mo na rin yung female butts sa list. ;)

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hofelina

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Re: Facts that Women should know from Men
« Reply #3 on: December 10, 2008, 03:49:20 PM »
Ondoy Gener,

Ibig mong sabihin yung katulad ni J Lopez?

Manay

but what does a great butt do if the face looks like a horse?

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Lorenzo

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Re: Facts that Women should know from Men
« Reply #4 on: January 03, 2009, 11:18:27 AM »
Women need to give their men space at times.

I for one never liked it when my xgf nagged me or demanded to know my location.

Men, just like women, require breathing space.



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Re: Facts that Women should know from Men
« Reply #5 on: January 03, 2009, 02:31:18 PM »


This is a wealth of experience that GENERations
will re-read for years to come. Classic!  ;D



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Re: Facts that Women should know from Men
« Reply #6 on: January 03, 2009, 04:45:13 PM »

What Women Should Know About Men

1. If you think the way to a man's heart is through his stomach you're
   aiming to high.

2. Women don't make fools of men -- most of them are the do-it-yourself
   types.

3. The best reason to divorce a man is a health reason: you've got sick
   of him.

4. Never trust a man who says he's the boss at home. He probaly lies
   about other things too.

5. A woman's work that is never done, is the stuff she asked her husband
   to do.

6. If you want a nice man go for a bald one -- they try harder.

7. Go for younger men. You might as well -- they never mature anyway.

8. There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men --
   "don't" and "stop" (but not used together).

9. Men are all the same -- they just have different faces so you can
   tell them apart.

10. Definition of a man with manners -- he gets out of the bath to pee.

11. Whenever you meet a man who would make a good husband, you will
    usually find that he is.

12. Scientists have just discovered something that can do the work of
    five men -- a women.

13. There are a lot of words you can use to describe men -- strong,
    caring, loving -- they'd be wrong but you could still use them!

14. Men are like animals -- messy, insensitive and potentially violent
    -- but they make great pets!

15. Mens brains are like the prison system -- not enough cells per man.

16. Husbands are like children -- they're fine if they're someone
    else's.



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Gener

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Re: Facts that Women should know from Men
« Reply #7 on: January 03, 2009, 07:20:18 PM »
Ondoy Gener,

Ibig mong sabihin yung katulad ni J Lopez?

Manay

Manay Tess, ang tawag naming mga kalalakihan sa ganyan ay "hipon". hehehehe, tapon ang ulo at isubo ang katawan

but what does a great butt do if the face looks like a horse?

manay tess, hipon ang tawag ddon, tapon ang ulo, subo ang katawan, hehehe ;D

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