I have pain in my heart, but there is no bitterness. I don’t see you as a mistake. I still remember the beautiful moments we had. Yes, our journey was riddled with many rough patches, but life is never just one shade. I was angry, to be honest. I was mad at you. I was blaming you for everything. But I later realized that I won’t find my peace that way. So I looked back at everything again. And you know, it was just meant to be. We are better this way, apart from each other, but in peace. We were both just burning to keep this dead wood alive. It was good that we buried it. I know I have said many mean things to you. And you too have hurt me with those toxic words. You know, we end up saying the worst things when we are hurting. And we both were hurting. So let’s not seek apologies and reasons. We are tired of those endless fights, aren’t we? So what to seek now? I think closure is all I want. And I don’t want it from you. I am writing this just to pour my heart out.
You know where you lost me? You started to make me feel disrespected. I went to bed, feeling unappreciated and worthless. I thought this was not big enough a reason to say goodbye. But I was so wrong. Respect is what keeps a relationship alive after the initial spark. It keeps suffocating you, that burn in your heart when you fight to be treated with respect. So yes, you were right. I did not have many reasons against you. It was just one. You did not respect me. For you, it was no issue. And for me, it was everything. That's where we grew apart. So I will never have any regrets about this decision. It was critical for me to keep my soul alive, my dignity intact. And I hope you bloom the same way. I wish you all the happiness and love in the world. But I pray that we don’t cross paths again, ever. I don’t want to keep in touch. I want us to just live peacefully and apart from each other. Trust me, that’s the best thing that can happen to us now. I have almost healed already. And I won’t let anything come between me and my peace now, no person, no relation. From now on, my life is about me and my dreams.
~ Rahul Kaushik
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