Tubag Bohol With Mike Ligalig

Into Your Heart => Anonymous Diary Blog => Topic started by: Gener on June 17, 2010, 08:47:14 pm

Title: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on June 17, 2010, 08:47:14 pm
Son, you are in your 2nd year of being a college student. Dalawang taon  na lang magtatapos ka na sa kolehiyo at sana kapag dumating ang panahon na iyon, kung may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad.

Marahil marami ang magtataas ng kilay o di kaya’y magtatanong ng “Bakit?” kapag nalaman nila na ganito ang payo ko sa iyo. Sabagay marami pa rin sa mga kababayan natin na ang paniniwala ay ‘mayaman ang mga OFW’, ‘masarap ang buhay sa abroad’ o kaya’s sikat ka kapag may kamag anak ka sa abroad. Siyempre naman, halos puro imported ang gamit sa bahay, ‘stateside’ wika nga. Pero ang hindi nila alam ay kung ano ba ang kapalit ng mga materyal na kasaganahan ito.

Karamihan sa mga magulang na nagtratrabaho sa abroad ay hindi maikaila ang ‘sense of loss’ na kung minsan ay may pagsisisi dahil sa hindi nakagisnang paglaki ng mga anak na naiwan sa Pilipinas. I grope for words to describe the passing of an era which part of my life have been sacrificed. Mula ng ako’y nagtrabaho sa abroad, I have looked at you and to other siblings of yours wishing that I could see all of you to grow into fine human beings wishing that I was there every step of your way. Pero ang reyalidad, hindi kasi malayo ako sa inyo. Nagkakasya na lang ako sa pagsasaya ng mag isa na malayo sa inyo sa panahon ng inyong kagalakan and perhaps bled profusely in my own when I know that one of you is in pain. Lagi ko kayong naaalala when I visit a nice place or eat an unusually fine meal kasi ang lagi kong sinasabi, “Sana kasama ko ang pamilya ko.” I worry for your safety and I cannot imagine not being able to recognize you and your other siblings in your mature years. Naalala ko tuloy minsan ng tanungin ko si mommy mo kung sino yung binata na nasa picture na ipinadala niya sa email ko. Sabi ni mommy mo, “Ano ka ba Dad, si Glenn yan, panganay mo!”

Sa panahon ngayon ng ‘absentee parenting’, the communication of love has taken the form of steady stream of ‘balik-bayan box’ every Christmas. Pero sa kabila ng dami ng reagalong natatangap, this however cannot compensate for the erosion of intimacy in the family. How easy to measure the benefits from overseas work but remain doubtful if one can ever quantify what a migrating parent has given up in terms of love. Kaya anak, if ever may choice ka after your graduation at kung makakahanap ka ng trabaho sa Pilipinas, kahit hnidi kalakihan ang sweldo basta disente at marangal, huwag kang mag-abroad. Diyan ka na lang sa Pilipinas kasi balang araw magkakaroon ka na rin ng sarili mong pamilya, mas masarap na abutin ang pangrap ninyo sa buhay ng magkakasama.
 

Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: vrglguapo on June 17, 2010, 10:14:05 pm
Para sa akin bigyan ko nang karapatan ang mga anak ko mag decide kung gusto sila mag abroad hala sigi ,para sa maganda nilang kinabukasan,Para sa sarili nilang mga pamilya..Katulad sa akin na isang magulang hindi ko naman asahan na magsama kami habang buhay dahil darating ang araw at sila ay mag asawa din.Siguro sa unang panahon kung pinigilan ako nang mga parents  ko mag abroad, hindi ko marating ang buhay ko ngayon at sa mama ko na age of 96 dahil sa trabaho ko dito sa abroad nabigyan ko siya nang buhay na comfortable at kasaganahan.Never in my life i say to my self i was sorry to work abroad.Kahit malayo sa anak makauwi din kami once or twice a year at pinapa bakasyon din namin dito sa abroad paminsan minsan.Kaya masabi ko lang Anak,if ever you have a choice,go abroad if you have a chance you have to make your own life,mahirap ang buhay sa pinas pag dating nang sahod ubos na sa pambayad nang utang,petsa 5 pa lang nang buwan umpisa naman nang utang..Haayyyy buhay Pinoy nga naman..
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: statesville on June 18, 2010, 01:21:09 am
Ang kasabihang ang kaligayahan ay hindi mabibili sa pera  talagang may katutuhanan
   makaya mo mang bilhin ang materyal na bagay pero hindi matatakpan ang
   sikip nang dibdib  sa pangulila kong magkalayo ang mga mahal sa buhay.  :(
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: vrglguapo on June 18, 2010, 02:40:23 am
magsamasama ang pamilya kahit walang makain?,gutom at wala pang matricula sa escuela,kung may oppurtunity mag abroad bakit hindi nang mabigyan nang kasaganahan ang pamilya..Cguro kung ang buhay mo ay nakasama sa upper middle class sa Pilipinas ok lang hindi na mag abroad at may pang gastos sa familla..Pero kung ang sitwasyon sa buhay sa pilipinas ay kakha tuka katulad nang isang manok at isa na ako doon, hindi na bali mangulila sa famiila..Isa  ako sa bilang na libolibong mga OCW,idilat ang iyong mga mata at tangapin ang katutuhanan..Hindi mayaman ang Pinas..magsumikap para sa kinabukasan..
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: david on June 18, 2010, 03:12:43 am
og di man makapalit og kalipay ang kwarta, samot na ang way kwarta di kapalit og kalipay
kadaghanan sa piskay og mga balay sa amoa poro naay membro sa pamilya nagtrabaho sa abroad
akong anak gipa tokoranvkog  bay, suportado sa tanang bagay pero among sabot og di mag tarong sa pag skwela
kotob 18 anyos og di siya mokayod gutom, wa nay suporta ...
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Aaron on June 18, 2010, 03:13:16 am
ako kung ang pag abroad ang dahilan parang mabigyan ko ang kinabukasan ang mga nak ko susunggaban ko ,dito ka nga sa pnas wala kana mang maayos na trabaho mas masakit na makita mo sila na hindi mo maibigay ang kanilang gusto kaysa hindi mo sila makita peru alam mo na nasa maayos ang kanilang buhay.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: david on June 18, 2010, 03:14:38 am
og di man makapalit og kalipay ang kwarta, samot na ang way kwarta di kapalit og kalipay
kong may oportyunidad nga makapag abroad nganong di man mo abroad
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: hofelina on June 18, 2010, 05:22:13 am
Hindi gawang biro ang magdesisyon, dahil tayo ay mapagmahal sa pamilya, nais nating mabigyan sila ng kaginhawa-an, kay ang pag-abroad ay hindi maiiwasan.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on June 18, 2010, 09:43:25 am
As the saying goes: “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” Going abroad to work will definitely put money in one's bank account enough to live a little comfortable life—that if he/she knows how to handle it, perhaps that would probably explains why majority of OFW's are still working abroad despite being abroad for more than 10 years or so.

My intention of asking my son not go abroad is clear (if ever he has a choice, and this is not an order but a counsel from a father who had experienced being a diaspora). Ofcourse, this is given the fact that in worst case, he couldn't find a decent job in the Philippines and there is a ways and means for him to find good one outside of the country though away from his family, I think the decision is very clear. But if he has a choice, I want him to weigh the consequences, the pros and the cons of being away from his family.

There is nothing bad in our intention to give our family comforts in life and that is the reason why most of us went abroad (like me till now) but there should be a fixed plan for us to achieve our goal. The irony is that most of us doesn't even have that goal and we end up growing older and still working away from family. I even read sad stories where OFW parent finally met his family in wheel chair as an invalid human being while others are-- in a casket. Who want's to end our life like that? Anyone?

That is why my advise to my son is that, if he has a choice, why not let try his luck in the Philippines? Living expenses may be tough, but with patience, perseverance, hard-work and focus, life here couldn’t all be that bad. He may not make a fortune but he can be creative to make ends meet, just so he and his family can have a life together. The long and short of it is he has to make a hard choice—and it should not be on the side of glitter.

"Life satisfaction should not be measured not by gross domestic product, but by gross national happiness." --King of Bhutan
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Raquelproud boholana on June 18, 2010, 11:46:09 am
Very good advice Gener. Ako man din ay mga kapatid ,pamangkin,kaibigan na nagtatrabaho abroad at naisip ko na kung mahirap ito sa kanila mas lalong mahirap itong sitwasyon na to sa mga naiwan. I can't imagine being away from my children that long. Last week nagpunta kami nang dalawang anak ko sa Florida tapos naiwan ang dalawang bunso. Over one week lang akong nawala pagbalik ko yung anak kong bunso 10 months old halos di na niya ako nakilala tapos ang dami na niyang nagawa sa one week na absence ko. Naisip ko tuloy ano kaya kung buong taon akong nawala siguro ang hirap. I feel sad nga sa mga pamangkin ko sa atin na Daddy nila or Mama wala kasi nga nagtatrabaho sa malayong lugar mapifeel mo talaga ang longing nila. May pera nga sila at may nakakain pero talagang may deperensya.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: taga tigbao on June 18, 2010, 03:18:29 pm
Ako man ay may planong mag-abroad pero hanggat may maganda pa at desenting trabaho dito sa Pilipinas ay hindi ko muna gagawin ang aking balak ITAY.  8)

If I can earn a decent income here enough to provide for my family and for some other luxuries, hindi na lang din muna ang pag-aabroad.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on June 18, 2010, 03:21:11 pm
Ako man ay may planong mag-abroad pero hanggat may maganda pa at desenting trabaho dito sa Pilipinas ay hindi ko muna gagawin ang aking balak ITAY.  8)


Mabuti naman malaman anak at maayos ang buhay mo sa Pinas,ANAK ;)
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on June 18, 2010, 03:42:33 pm
The link below mirrors one of the reasons why I say what i wnat to say to my son. This time, I'm expressing my self as a son to my father. This is for all of you fellow OFWs in our endless struggle to provide a better means for our family and to all the fathers as well, this is for all of us.

http://www.gmanews.tv/story/193314/hampas-ng-pagmamahal-ni-itay# (http://www.gmanews.tv/story/193314/hampas-ng-pagmamahal-ni-itay#)
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: vrglguapo on June 20, 2010, 02:55:51 am
The link below mirrors one of the reasons why I say what i wnat to say to my son. This time, I'm expressing my self as a son to my father. This is for all of you fellow OFWs in our endless struggle to provide a better means for our family and to all the fathers as well, this is for all of us.

http://www.gmanews.tv/story/193314/hampas-ng-pagmamahal-ni-itay# (http://www.gmanews.tv/story/193314/hampas-ng-pagmamahal-ni-itay#)

..To be a OCW we must have a strong personality, wide understanding about life and welfare to our family,good understanding about value of money,Honesty to our wife and children,and not a sentimental person..These are lists of few thing you need to be an OCW.If you think you don't have one of these things ,its better to stay  at home lalo na yung mga seloso at selosa ..Baka magka problema pa at wala na si Dear Kuya Eddie..Kaya ang nangyayari nang ibang OCW umuwi sa Pinas sira ang ulo deretso sa Mental Hospital..Payong kapatid lang Kabayan if you have weak at heart and weak personality huwag na kayong mag OCW.. :-[
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on June 20, 2010, 03:07:18 am
..To be a OCW we must have a strong personality, wide understanding about life and welfare to our family,good understanding about value of money,Honesty to our wife and children,and not a sentimental person..These are lists of few thing you need to be an OCW.If you think you don't have one of these things ,its better to stay  at home lalo na yung mga seloso at selosa ..Baka magka problema pa at wala na si Dear Kuya Eddie..Kaya ang nangyayari nang ibang OCW umuwi sa Pinas sira ang ulo deretso sa Mental Hospital..Payong kapatid lang Kabayan if you have weak at heart and weak personality huwag na kayong mag OCW.. :-[

Kabayan, kahit anong tatag ng personality ng isang tao at iba pa kung walang pananalig sa Panginoon Diyos ay walang patutunguhan mabuti, kay nasa abroad ka o maging sa sariling bansa. Ang pagiging sentimental ay di sukatan ng kahinaan ng isang tao ganun din naman ang pagkakaroon ng strong na personality ay di rin pamantayan ng kalakasan ng tao bagkus, ang pananalig sa Diyos na siyang pinagmumulan na katatagan at tagumpay sa buhay. Kung minsan ang sobrang kompiyansa sa sarili ang nagiging dahilan ng kapahamakan. Mapalad ang mga tao na umaamin ng kahinaan at umaasa ng kalakasan sa Panginoon sa[agkat nasa kanila ang habag ng Paginoon kaysa sa mga taong nananalig sa sariling lakas, talino at abilidad.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: vrglguapo on June 20, 2010, 03:32:47 am
Tama lahat cnasabi mo kaibigan..sana maganda ang hantungan sa pagiging OCW mo good luck to you and God bless sa ating mga OCW nang hindi mapahamak sa maling landas..
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: fdaray on June 20, 2010, 07:42:27 am
Dili nato e discourage ang mga anak na mag-abroad. Depende sa kagustohan nila. Daghang Pinoy nga abroad ang ilang anak nga magara ang mga bahay, at nakapag-aral sa kanilang mga anak sa mga prestigious school .

Kahit naman sa Pilipinas, marami pa rin ang mga nasa maling landas. Depende....,


Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: vrglguapo on June 20, 2010, 09:52:55 am
Dili nato e discourage ang mga anak na mag-abroad. Depende sa kagustohan nila. Daghang Pinoy nga abroad ang ilang anak nga magara ang mga bahay, at nakapag-aral sa kanilang mga anak sa mga prestigious school .

Kahit naman sa Pilipinas, marami pa rin ang mga nasa maling landas. Depende....,



Tinood jud nang imong gisulti fdaray,kay sa e discourage ang .mga bata mag abroad hatagan nato sila ug incouragement para sa ilang magandang kinabukasan.Naa ko estorya bahin anang pag abroad.Ang among duha ka silingan yung isa gusto mag OCW yung isa ayaw dahil malungkot daw at ano ba naman yung pera kung hiwalay sa pamilya.Nang dahil mahina ang loob namalagi na lang sa pinas,gutom ang inabut sa pamilya hindi pa nakapag aral ang mga bata dahil sa palaging kapos ang pera.Yung isa naman pumunta sa UAE tinitiis ang lungkot at hirap sa buhay nang mabigyan naman nang kasaganahan ang pamilya.Nakatapus mag aral ang mga anak may nurse at Eng.yung nurse paalis naman sa oabroad.Yung tatay hindi na nag abroad dahil tapos na ang mga anak.Maganda na ang buhay  ngayon.Kaya may kasabihan kung walang tiyaga walang nilaga.Sa lahat na gustong mag OCW mabuhay kayong lahat.Kayo ang bagong bayani nang Pinas.I salute your courage,and determination to have a better life.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on June 20, 2010, 06:27:30 pm
As the saying goes: “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” Going abroad to work will definitely put money in one's bank account enough to live a little comfortable life—that if he/she knows how to handle it,

Living expenses may be tough, but with patience, perseverance, hard-work and focus, life here couldn’t all be that bad. He may not make a fortune but he can be creative to make ends meet, just so he and his family can have a life together. The long and short of it is he has to make a hard choice—and it should not be on the side of glitter.


There are always 2 sides of the coin. In the case of going abroad, I wouldn't be surprised if our vision is biased always on the side of the economics lest we forget the immeasurable losses of migration, and I already mentioned that in my previous post above. And really the road to hell is paved with good intentions and I know all of us will definetly agree that no Pinoy diaspora leaves our country without good intentions but we cannot have the best of both worlds, happiness and prosperity. It's just a matter of one weighing one's priority. Life's happiness is not always about on the side of prosperity but prosperity can sometimes be a result of happiness. You can be prosperous in a sense that you are surrounded by people you loved and people who loved you in return but can't be happy even we have the finest things in the world. While it is true that we must allow our children to make decision for themselves but as parents, it is our obligation to present clearly the scenarios, the pros and the cons, the left and the right so that they will be guided in their decision. But if we will have it our way as parents, we would want them to follow the "tried and tested" formula we developed all throughout the years of our existense. But at the ned of the day, it is them (children) who will still decide what road they want to travel.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: vrglguapo on June 21, 2010, 01:44:07 am
Another good example of OCW parents and thier children left behind..I guess there was no regrets on both parents and kids on thier situatuion..kaunting tiis kabayan nang umunlad ang buhay  http://www.boholchronicle.com/2010/jun/20/comm2.htm (http://www.boholchronicle.com/2010/jun/20/comm2.htm)..Never say bahala ug saging gikaon basta loving..hehe
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on June 21, 2010, 02:54:46 am
Another good example of OCW parents and thier children left behind..I guess there was no regrets on both parents and kids on thier situatuion..kaunting tiis kabayan nang umunlad ang buhay  http://www.boholchronicle.com/2010/jun/20/comm2.htm (http://www.boholchronicle.com/2010/jun/20/comm2.htm)..Never say bahala ug saging gikaon basta loving..hehe

Kabayan, you exactly missed the point. never in my post could you find anything that will say or advocate that its ok to to stay to where one's family is even to the point of living a miserable life. i suggest that you read my post toroughly before you conclude your statement.

While it is true that there are successful stories of pinoy migration (and i must say that i belong to this small statistics) but have you tried to established how many stories belong to the "not so good ending?" Hindi na tayo kailangang lumayo kaibigan at basahin mo na lang ang laman ng pahayagan araw-araw.

No one doubts the resiliency of Filipinos especially OFWs. Hindi matatawaran ang pagtitiis ng mga migranteng Pinoy kahit na anong hirap ang danasin sa ibang bansa. Subalit sigurado ako, kung tatanungin mo ang bawat isa sa amin, kung may pagkakataon na maghanapbuhay sa sariling bayan, kundi man lahat, marahil higit sa nakararami sa amin na sasabihin sa iyo na mas gugustuhin  pa rin namin magtrabaho sa sariling bayan kung may pagkakataon at opportunidad (at hindi makuntento lamang sa pagkain ng saging). Iyan KABAYAN, ang ibig sabihin o ang buod na aking post na sana mainitindihan mo ng lubusan ng sa gayon ay hindi ka makapagbigay ng inconclusive na statement.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on June 23, 2010, 01:15:15 pm
"Gusto kong sisihin ang Pilipinas dahil napakahirap ng buhay dito. Sa Amerika ba may tatay na nangingibang-bansa para makapagtrabaho lang?" - Luis Iral Galicia

Wala sanang pinoy na napipilitang umalis ng bansa para maghanap-buhay kung mayroon sanang maayos na polisiya sa pagtataguyod at pagpapasigla ng business opportunities sa Pilipinas. Sa mga nagdaang gobyerno, wala akong makita na plataporma na inilatag para kung hindi man wakasan ang forced migration ng mga pinoy or at least mabawasan bagkus, ay umaayuda pa sa mass exodus ng pinoy dahil ito na lang ang last saving grace ng ekonomiya ng pilipinas. Para bagang sinasabi na, "sige mga OFW, kailangan ninyong mag abroad dahil kailangan ng bayan ang remittance ninyo. At kami sa gobyerno, sasakay na lang sa epekto ng patuloy na paglago ng buwanang remittance para kredito sa epekto kunwari ng masaganang ekonomiya ng bansa" Kung sasabihin na magtiis kaming mga OFW, matagal ng nagtitiis ang mga pinoy na parang kahalintulad ng mga "prostitute" sa brothel na walang magawa kung hindi mag paubaya sa mga nakapilang parukyano hangang sa ang iba ay inabot na ang kamatayan. Kinakailangan ba na sapitin ng bawat OFW ang kamatayan para mapatunayan ang pinoy resiliency? Sabagay, bagong bayani daw kami pero anong epekto ng pagiging bayani mo kung ang pamilya mo ang nasakripisyo. Basahin ang kalakip na istorya sa ibaba.

http://www.gmanews.tv/story/165443/ang-tatay-kong-ofw (http://www.gmanews.tv/story/165443/ang-tatay-kong-ofw)
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: vrglguapo on June 23, 2010, 03:02:26 pm
"Gusto kong sisihin ang Pilipinas dahil napakahirap ng buhay dito. Sa Amerika ba may tatay na nangingibang-bansa para makapagtrabaho lang?" - Luis Iral Galicia

Wala sanang pinoy na napipilitang umalis ng bansa para maghanap-buhay kung mayroon sanang maayos na polisiya sa pagtataguyod at pagpapasigla ng business opportunities sa Pilipinas. Sa mga nagdaang gobyerno, wala akong makita na plataporma na inilatag para kung hindi man wakasan ang forced migration ng mga pinoy or at least mabawasan bagkus, ay umaayuda pa sa mass exodus ng pinoy dahil ito na lang ang last saving grace ng ekonomiya ng pilipinas. Para bagang sinasabi na, "sige mga OFW, kailangan ninyong mag abroad dahil kailangan ng bayan ang remittance ninyo. At kami sa gobyerno, sasakay na lang sa epekto ng patuloy na paglago ng buwanang remittance para kredito sa epekto kunwari ng masaganang ekonomiya ng bansa" Kung sasabihin na magtiis kaming mga OFW, matagal ng nagtitiis ang mga pinoy na parang kahalintulad ng mga "prostitute" sa brothel na walang magawa kung hindi mag paubaya sa mga nakapilang parukyano hangang sa ang iba ay inabot na ang kamatayan. Kinakailangan ba na sapitin ng bawat OFW ang kamatayan para mapatunayan ang pinoy resiliency? Sabagay, bagong bayani daw kami pero anong epekto ng pagiging bayani mo kung ang pamilya mo ang nasakripisyo. Basahin ang kalakip na istorya sa ibaba.

http://www.gmanews.tv/story/165443/ang-tatay-kong-ofw (http://www.gmanews.tv/story/165443/ang-tatay-kong-ofw)

Hindi Talaga mawala sa isang OCW na may sentimentality dahil sa malayo sa mahal sa buhay..Pero bago sila pumirma nang contrata patulak sa ibang bansa dapat  alamin muna nila ang advantages at disadvantage nang magiging OCW para pagdating nang araw walang sisihan.Ang pagiging barumbado o lasingero o magiging addict o nagiging dalagang ina ang isang anak ,yan ay mangyayari din kahit both parents nandiyan sa Pinas..I say that's why the mother who is left behind is the biggest social influence of the behavior of their children,,Yung mga Nanay na nagmahjong maghapon,puro social doon social dito walang trabaho, mga social climber,kadalasan sa mga anak nila ay failure sa buhay.I would  like to share to all OCW this article i read from Inquirer ,i hope they will remember this story when they are working overseas and serve them well..http://blogs.inquirer.net/moneysmarts/ (http://blogs.inquirer.net/moneysmarts/)
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on June 23, 2010, 08:55:01 pm
tama ka dyan kabayan.

kung minsan ang mga kabayan natin kapag nakaranas ng konting ginhawa ay nalilimutan na ang mag "save for the rainy days" at kung minsan, kahit na di naman kalakihan ang kita sa abroad, pag uwi sa Pinas, gastos dito gastos doon kaya akala tuloy ng mga kamag anak ay 'mayaman ang mga OFW.' Meron akong kasamahan sa trabaho, pag uwi sa Cebu, inum-dito, inum doon. Ipinasara pa raw niya ang isang Videoke house para exclusively for him and his drinking mates, hayun after 1 month pa lang, hurot na gihapon kaya pagdating dito sa opisina, utang na naman sa opisina and considering na almost 10 years na sa company, hayun wala pa ring asenso. Kaya nga dapat, habang nasa abroad kailangan may goal setting. Hangangang kailan ka ba dapat magtrabaho ng malayo sa pamilya mo. kasi kung wala tayong objective sa buhay at sige-sige lang, kadalasan yun yung mga inaabutan na ng katandaan sa pag-a-abroad, wala pa rin asenso. Dapat lagi natin isipin na ang trabaho sa ibang bayan ay di dapat maging parte ng long term planning. dapat gamitin lang ito bilang instrumento sa pagahon sa kahirapan at makapag umpisa ng buhay na maayos sa Pilipinas kasama ang pamilya. Dapat tayong mga Pilipino ay baguhin ang mentalidad na sa halip maghanap ng trabaho, dapat gumawa ng trabaho at maging enterpreneur.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Bambi on July 03, 2010, 06:26:56 am
Gener, parents advice is really logical.  But i think...ang anak ay walang ibang choice din....you will never find a good paid job in the Phils unless until "You are the fittest or kapit is"
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: alycxs on July 03, 2010, 11:23:21 am
I don't have kids but I grew up with an OFW dad.

If I did have children, I would encourage them to go where their heart leads them. When I was 16, I got admitted to UP Diliman Pre-law and wanted to take archeology as my minor then switch over. I've always read about Egypt and Knossos and I've always wanted to go. My father told me that if I ever wanted a husband, kids and a family, my life as an archeologist would not work. He made me weigh it on my own, the important things that I really wanted to have further down in life. So I abandoned the notion and took Pre-law.

A few years later, I found myself on my last year of Accounting at HNU. I asked my parents if I could take French and Japanese classes for the summer since it was offered. They asked me why and I said, well, after I graduate, I'd like to become a flight attendant for KLM or Cathay and take my MBA online, or do distance learning. I've always wanted to travel and see...well...Egypt, Greece and Rome. So my father, who has traveled the world in his 20 some years of being a Seaman told me that if I pursued this path, I will forget time and before I know it, I've seen the places I've wanted to see but grow old without a husband or kids.

I dwelled on this, but took the classes anyway. He gave me a choice and gave me the money to study.

A while later, through luck or destiny, I found myself married to a dapper young man and moved to a new country. Two years later my move, my father got sick, lost his income and now has solely to rely on my mother. Sometimes, with a little help from me. Not all the time, but I'm sure all the sugar free supplies I send in the balikbayan boxes go a long way, specially glucerna.

Had my father discouraged me about going abroad, I probably wouldn't have worked and studied so hard when I was young. If he just gave me a subscription to National Geographic and then told me to stay put, I don't know if I would have had the drive or still be sitting in Bohol and reading books.

I probably wouldn't have aimed for science high school and probably wouldn't have studied so hard to graduate near the top of my class because I didn't aim for UP or ADMU or LSU. Its all a domino effect. Maybe it works for some kids, maybe not for others. In my case, I wanted to be in a good school, so I can have the background to go where I want to go and do what I want to do.

If Papa had said, stay pud and find a way to make a life here in the Philippines...well, Lord knows how hard our lives  would've been after he got sick. Or if he would still be alive, seeing that sometimes, Glucerna and Ensure is all he could eat/drink.  If I was still there, I certainly could not afford Glucerna, or sugar free cookies or sugar free chocolates...I know some are just creature comforts but it sure makes life so much bearable for someone who's partially blind, diabetic and needs assistance 24/7.



I sure miss Papa...  :)

(https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi51.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Ff394%2Falycxs%2FPapa%2Ffatherduck.jpg&hash=1320a63a0a401f033af30501db832264b9e2b7d3)


Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Lorenzo on July 03, 2010, 11:50:36 am
I don't have kids but I grew up with an OFW dad.

If I did have children, I would encourage them to go where their heart leads them. When I was 16, I got admitted to UP Diliman Pre-law and wanted to take archeology as my minor then switch over. I've always read about Egypt and Knossos and I've always wanted to go. My father told me that if I ever wanted a husband, kids and a family, my life as an archeologist would not work. He made me weigh it on my own, the important things that I really wanted to have further down in life. So I abandoned the notion and took Pre-law.

A few years later, I found myself on my last year of Accounting at HNU. I asked my parents if I could take French and Japanese classes for the summer since it was offered. They asked me why and I said, well, after I graduate, I'd like to become a flight attendant for KLM or Cathay and take my MBA online, or do distance learning. I've always wanted to travel and see...well...Egypt, Greece and Rome. So my father, who has traveled the world in his 20 some years of being a Seaman told me that if I pursued this path, I will forget time and before I know it, I've seen the places I've wanted to see but grow old without a husband or kids.

I dwelled on this, but took the classes anyway. He gave me a choice and gave me the money to study.

A while later, through luck or destiny, I found myself married to a dapper young man and moved to a new country. Two years later my move, my father got sick, lost his income and now has solely to rely on my mother. Sometimes, with a little help from me. Not all the time, but I'm sure all the sugar free supplies I send in the balikbayan boxes go a long way, specially glucerna.

Had my father discouraged me about going abroad, I probably wouldn't have worked and studied so hard when I was young. If he just gave me a subscription to National Geographic and then told me to stay put, I don't know if I would have had the drive or still be sitting in Bohol and reading books.

I probably wouldn't have aimed for science high school and probably wouldn't have studied so hard to graduate near the top of my class because I didn't aim for UP or ADMU or LSU. Its all a domino effect. Maybe it works for some kids, maybe not for others. In my case, I wanted to be in a good school, so I can have the background to go where I want to go and do what I want to do.

If Papa had said, stay pud and find a way to make a life here in the Philippines...well, Lord knows how hard our lives  would've been after he got sick. Or if he would still be alive, seeing that sometimes, Glucerna and Ensure is all he could eat/drink.  If I was still there, I certainly could not afford Glucerna, or sugar free cookies or sugar free chocolates...I know some are just creature comforts but it sure makes life so much bearable for someone who's partially blind, diabetic and needs assistance 24/7.



I sure miss Papa...  :)

(https://tubagbohol.mikeligalig.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi51.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Ff394%2Falycxs%2FPapa%2Ffatherduck.jpg&hash=1320a63a0a401f033af30501db832264b9e2b7d3)




INSPIRING!
And you know , there is a reason for the things we do, and special circumstances like these always reminds of the necessity in our decisions in life. I am happy to read that you are doing good and that your father, whom worked abroad to support his children, is now being cared for by his wife and children.

Everything is a cycle, Alice. As our parents care for us, it is also expected that we, too, care for them and support them when the time does come. God Bless You!


PS.
Alice, good to see your beautiful face here in Tubag Bohol Dot Com again!
:)

Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on July 03, 2010, 12:52:45 pm
Thanks for sharing your inspiring story Kabayan Alice.
 
I don’t see anything wrong with your father's advise/opinion neither your being abroad. It's just that raising a family where the husband or the wife is miles away from their family is difficult. You have the advantage that most OFW's doesn’t have--working abroad and at the same time living with your family. But this opportunity comes only in few pieces and so rare that only a few could have. I understand where your father is coming from because I’m beginning to experience the situation that your father had painted. How easy to measure the benefits of overseas work but I doubt if anyone can ever quantify what has been given up or lost in terms of love.

I just hope that someday, working abroad is just a matter of choice and not the only choice.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: alycxs on July 03, 2010, 12:58:08 pm
Gener, growing up, my father was gone 6-10 months at a time. When I was very little, my mother said he was gone as long as 18 months out to sea just to save money to complete their house and pay off the lot that they got to build their house on.

I am away from my parents and brother. I am blessed that I have my husband, but he too is gone sometimes 2 weeks out of the month. He is American but works for Cathay in Hong Kong since airlines here in the US don't pay their pilots very much. In a sense, he is like an OFW, same amount of time away from home, but just in 2 week increments.  :)
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Lorenzo on July 03, 2010, 01:14:45 pm
I will share my story, next.



I grew up in a rather large and very warm , welcoming family. Both sides of my family, in reference to my father's and mother's, were pivotal in the education of my parents , the upbringing of filial piety, maternal and paternal responsibility, as well as loyalty to the entire family and in quest for the good of the family and those who are in need that the family has obligations to.

I would not say that my family is unique or different from the average Filipino Family, rather, it is their experience , in regards to my mother and father, that brings to me and my siblings a personal touch of the Filipino Diaspora. My father's side of the family are very well educated, my grandmother's side came from a father who was a High School Principal in Padre Burgos, Leyte, and whose wife was also a teacher, and their parents before them were educators and educated during the time of the Spanish, then later in the American epoch. Education has always been stressed and forwarded in my father's side of the family. My grand uncle, the late Dr. Hermogines Ebuenga, M.D, was the first Medical Anesthesiologist in Bohol Island Province, was himself sent to school by my grandfather, the late Mr. Rustico Aray Lucino, a businessman from Bohol. His actions in supporting family, helping family is the very manifestation of the saying "Family Loyalty". Aside from assisting my grand uncle, my grandfather also made sure that all of his children were educated and made sure that they understood the necessity of financial stability, and the possibilities of a successful life abroad as well as one in the Philippines. My father and uncles went on to engineering at CIT and eventually went abroad , an aunt who went to nursing school and eventually went to the US, an aunt went on to law school and now is a bureaucrat in Bohol, another uncle who was a graduate of Cebu Institute of Medicine who is now based in the UK. My grandfather and my grandmother taught their children the importance of personal and filial responsibility--and that one should remember their past and their family who are in need because you really do not know when you yourself will be in need. A person whom you help today, will be the person who might help you in the future. My father and my Mother were both OFWs before finally becoming American Citizens, my father was a Supervisor Civil Engineer at a German-based company in Saudi Arabia whilst my mother was a Registered Nurse who found a job in the United States during the height of the Filipino Brain Drain in late 1980s and early 1990s. Filipinos are also survivors. When he arrived to the United States, my father chose to go to school again--to get his RN, despite being a Civil Engineer. The reasons for this change in careers was to augment our family's income and to better provide for his family; again a sacrifice. In fact, I can even claim that my parents sacrificed everything to come to the United States; a sacrifice to provide a better future for their children and for family back home. Tho my parents moved to the United States and we, with them, they never really forgot the importance of teaching us of the sacrifices of their family, as well as helping relatives and friends whom were in need. Again, upholding the teachings of my late grandfather who stressed the importance of Filial Piety and Filial Responsibility.

For me, as one who was raised in the American Life yet has links to the Brain Drain, I find it rather poignant to think about this situation.

I think that all Filipinos have a personal right to choose whether they want to be OFWS or not, to go abroad and seek greener pastures or to stay and find a great life in the Philippines. That personal and unalienable right to choose is theirs.

But I can totally understand why some of them would go abroad, I can understand why they send money to families every month, I can understand why they go home only once or twice a year, sometimes even once a decade.

The Universal Theme in the Tale of the Filipino Diaspora is this: Filial Piety, Filial Responsibility.

Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: alycxs on July 03, 2010, 01:33:05 pm
We also have to remember too " It is always greener at the other side..."  and "different strokes for different folks"

When I am at the height of my loneliness, I open facebook and see my childhood barkada with their pictures all over Bohol, the beaches, the caves, the climbs, the hike trails....

When I was growing up, I see my cousins stateside going to Disney and playing in the snow, swimming in their backyard pools, doing all the things that are not even available in the entire Philippines.

Lord knows what they think when they look at my life. Sometimes, I feel jealous of some of my old friends who's got children since after 6 years of marriage, I don't have any...and then, I get told that they feel jealous of me, that I get to drive to where I want and visit Bohol once or twice a year.

Some people enjoy life in the US and wish to petition everybody they can over. Some people absolutely hate it.  While I'd love to bring my parents and my brother over, specially my parents so they can have better medical care, my best friend, who makes more money than I do, a very successful RN would go home to Bohol in a heartbeat. No plans of bringing any family over. The highlight of her year is the annual 6 week stay in Bohol.

In the end, the choice of going abroad depends on the life a person wants to lead. I can't see a person who loves the warm sunshine, the beach and island life too much as thriving in a place like say..hmmm...Alaska...or even Minnesota in the winter .No amount of money can do that  ;)   Nor can I see a scholar, intent on furthering his or her knowledge be content to stay in our beautiful little island. mental and/or financial fulfillment just isn't there. ( Unless he/she is a marine biologist with a dive certificate )   :D
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Gener on July 03, 2010, 01:35:28 pm

I am away from my parents and brother. I am blessed that I have my husband, but he too is gone sometimes 2 weeks out of the month. He is American but works for Cathay in Hong Kong since airlines here in the US don't pay their pilots very much. In a sense, he is like an OFW, same amount of time away from home, but just in 2 week increments.  :)

You're still lucky, though 2 weeks can still be long for others but far,far better than those who only sees each other after every 2 years or worse, 3 or maybe more. Kaya for me, what I bargain to my boss is to allow me to go for a quarterly vacation kahit na walang increase, so that my kids can still remember my face :P
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Lorenzo on July 03, 2010, 01:39:19 pm
We also have to remember too " It is always greener at the other side..."  and "different strokes for different folks"

When I am at the height of my loneliness, I open facebook and see my childhood barkada with their pictures all over Bohol, the beaches, the caves, the climbs, the hike trails....

When I was growing up, I see my cousins stateside going to Disney and playing in the snow, swimming in their backyard pools, doing all the things that are not even available in the entire Philippines.

Lord knows what they think when they look at my life. Sometimes, I feel jealous of some of my old friends who's got children since after 6 years of marriage, I don't have any...and then, I get told that they feel jealous of me, that I get to drive to where I want and visit Bohol once or twice a year.

Some people enjoy life in the US and wish to petition everybody they can over. Some people absolutely hate it.  While I'd love to bring my parents and my brother over, specially my parents so they can have better medical care, my best friend, who makes more money than I do, a very successful RN would go home to Bohol in a heartbeat. No plans of bringing any family over. The highlight of her year is the annual 6 week stay in Bohol.

In the end, the choice of going abroad depends on the life a person wants to lead. I can't see a person who loves the warm sunshine, the beach and island life too much as thriving in a place like say..hmmm...Alaska...or even Minnesota in the winter .No amount of money can do that  ;)   Nor can I see a scholar, intent on furthering his or her knowledge be content to stay in our beautiful little island. mental and/or financial fulfillment just isn't there. ( Unless he/she is a marine biologist with a dive certificate )   :D

lol! I love the latter part: 'unless he/she is a marine biologist with a dive certificate'. :)

I guess thats the beauty of being Boholano; it is the fact that we are a migratory people, we adapt anywhere and everywhere.

And for us who are abroad and currently living abroad; we always have the option of going back to Bohol anytime we want, while at the same time being able to help friends and family whenever we can.

You are right tho; different circumstances applies for different people.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Lorenzo on July 03, 2010, 01:48:06 pm
You're still lucky, though 2 weeks can still be long for others but far,far better than those who only sees each other after every 2 years or worse, 3 or maybe more. Kaya for me, what I bargain to my boss is to allow me to go for a quarterly vacation kahit na walang increase, so that my kids can still remember my face :P

Gener, I understand how hard it is for kids to grow up without a father.

I remember when I was 3-4 years old and my father, who was a Civil Engineer in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, would come back once a year. I would always constantly ask my yayas where daddy was. He returned home once a year with a box of toys, food, clothes, etc. However, it was always painful for me whenever he had to go back to Saudi.

I would rather have him stay with us than go to Saudi. I remember one time when I was  younger, I found out that he was getting his clothes ready and packing his suitcase already. I knew he was going back to Saudi; and decided to come along. I packed my clothes in my own little suitcase, defiant and determined to tag along with my father, the Engineer.

My dad saw this and he laughed, tho he was crying at the same time. He explained to me that he would be back, but I kept on saying, "Gusto pood ko mo kuyug nimo, daddy...." (which means: I also want to go with you daddy).

Thanks be to God that my mom was granted permission to bring family to the United States (thanks to George H. Bush Sr).
Our family was united again.

Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: vrglguapo on July 03, 2010, 01:57:04 pm
You're still lucky, though 2 weeks can still be long for others but far,far better than those who only sees each other after every 2 years or worse, 3 or maybe more. Kaya for me, what I bargain to my boss is to allow me to go for a quarterly vacation kahit na walang increase, so that my kids can still remember my face :P
Bay Gener you can also use the Skype put a camera and you can talk and see them everyday and its free..And your kids can see you too..It is almost next thing of being there,very handy..In my time when i was working on the merchant navy there was no thing as Skype and we have to buy phone card w/c is very expensive to call home and months to wait for our mail to arrived.Now the OCW have the best in communication to their family so far..
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: alycxs on July 03, 2010, 02:38:11 pm
Most of the instant messengers have a webcam option. Back when I was 14-15, Yahoo messenger and mIRC was very popular with my friends. Both of those have a webcam and voicechat option just like skype. Free too. Then there's AIM and ICQ.

These days, the new laptops have built in webcams and mics so you don't have to get them separately. All you need for good communication is a good internet connection.....sheeshhh even facebook has pretty good chat.

Oh...facebook is prolly the best "life" sharing site, from photos to vids to notes...name it, it can probably be shared there. I found more than 50+ cousins there...some that I haven't seen for 15 or so years. I even found an old college buddy of mine which I haven't talked to for 10 years. My uncles who are still actively working as seamen use t-mobile and they send their wives a magicjack. With a DSL connection in Bohol, its like making a local call.

Its nice most of them have magicjack too, so its cheaper for me to call everyone. Including Mama and Papa.  ;D ;D ;D 8)
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: tubagboholspride on July 20, 2010, 04:14:48 pm
naniniwala po ako sa pananaw nyo. alam ko po yung kahit kadugo mo sya ay ilang ka. Naranasan ko po yan sa Tita ko na I think mga 7years xa sa Saudi Arabia at nung umuwi xa although alam ko naman na tita ko sya ilang parin ako sa kanya, at minsan nakikita ko sa mata nya na parang sad sya kasi parang akward nga.. kaya kung magkakaroon ako ng trabaho hanggat kaya dito lng ako sa Philippines.
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: st. agnes on September 05, 2010, 08:55:08 am
 Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad

omg! wHY?

Im too lazy to read the content..
this is what I am dreaming of.. to go abroad..
after everything happened to me, still, Im strong enough
to pursue my dreams..
tho my mom discourage me to go abroad because of my health, but still...
I believe in my prenciples in life...
I rather live a life with failure, than to live a life with regrets...
I am pushing thru my dreams.. after I will fully recover....
I see goin abroad would be our key to fullfill our dreams.
dreams of having a decent yet simple house, a hummer car for myself, a family of my own -- babie I mean...
how can I have them when we are earning not that much?
I think goin abroad is the answer for this...
so... wait for me there "abroad" (don't know which countryu I prefer to go... )
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Lorenzo on September 08, 2010, 03:10:04 am
Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad

omg! wHY?

Im too lazy to read the content..
this is what I am dreaming of.. to go abroad..
after everything happened to me, still, Im strong enough
to pursue my dreams..
tho my mom discourage me to go abroad because of my health, but still...
I believe in my prenciples in life...
I rather live a life with failure, than to live a life with regrets...
I am pushing thru my dreams.. after I will fully recover....
I see goin abroad would be our key to fullfill our dreams.
dreams of having a decent yet simple house, a hummer car for myself, a family of my own -- babie I mean...
how can I have them when we are earning not that much?
I think goin abroad is the answer for this...
so... wait for me there "abroad" (don't know which countryu I prefer to go... )

Elsie, follow your heart. Follow where you want to go, and by His Grace..you will do it. You can do it. Put your plans to God, and for sure He will guide your path. There is nothing that you cannot do when you present your plans before God Almighty...

That is always my method in doing things. Mo guide man siya , aber, He can make things happen even when we think it be hard to accomplish.


Keep on inspiring, sis!
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: st. agnes on September 10, 2010, 05:38:47 pm
He can make things happen even when we think it be hard to accomplish.

@ Bran Bran - Hey Kuya Bran.. thank u for that inspiring words... Yes, I will always will... to Put my plans to God... Thank you Kuya Bran....
Title: Re: Anak, if ever may choice ka, huwag kang mag-abroad
Post by: Lorenzo on September 12, 2010, 08:54:01 pm
Elsie,

Keep on inspiring others!

God Is Our Strength.